Man #1: *He calls 112. Man #2: Emergency Call: Fire department and
rescue service. In which location is the emergency? Man #1: In Kreuzberg.
Man #2: Where exactly in Kreuzberg? Man #1: Friedrichstraße.
Man #2: Ok. In Friedrichstraße. And
the house number? Man #1: 246.
Man #2: 246. What is the reason for your call? Man #1: He just wanted to change a light bulb,
but the child came into the room and turned on the light
just as he reached into the socket. He screamed and fell to the ground. Now there
is smoke coming from his ears and he isn’t reacting. Man #2: Can you open the doors for us
when we are there? Man #1: I can open the doors.
Man #2: The colleagues from the rescue service will be notified right away and then drive to you,
ok? If something changes or gets worse,
please call 112 again immediately. Man #1: Help! My son fell into the
river! Man #2: I
Where is your son? Man #1: He is there in the river!
Man #2: How did he fall in there? Man #1: I don’t know. I looked
away for one moment and then I heard a scream. I
turned around and he was already in the river. Man #2: It will all be ok. Help is
on the way. What is your son’s name? Man #1: Fred.
Man #2: Fred, you have to stay calm and try to hold on to the riverbank.
Help is on the way. You only have to hold on for a few minutes.
Man #1: Excuse me, have you seen a small brown dog? I lost my
dog. I can’t find him anywhere. Man #2: I saw a dog like that 10 minutes ago.
It went that way. Man #1: Thank you very much.
Man #1: Where is the hospital? Man #2: You will find the hospital
in Promenadenstraße. Is this an emergency? Should I call 112?
Man #1: No. This isn’t an emergency. I am just having a heart attack.
Man #2: That is definitely an emergency. You need an ambulance. You can’t
just take the bus to the hospital when you are having a heart attack.
Man #1: I can’t afford a trip in an ambulance.
Man #2: The health insurance fund pays for that. This is Germany, after all.
Man #1: Thank goodness that I had a heart attack in Germany and
not in the USA. At home that costs $450. Man #2: Then you would have two heart attacks.
You have the second one when you see the bill. *He winks to the camera.*
Man #1: Ow. My leg hurts. Man #2: What happened?
Man #1: I don’t know. One minute I was walking quite well, but then I heard a
loud crack. Now it really hurts. Man #2: I can see your bone. Maybe
you should sit down. Man #1: Yes, good idea.
Man #1: Do you have aspirin? Man #2: Yes. Why?
Man #1: May I have a pill? I have a headache.
Man #2: Just one pill? I usually take two.
Man #1: For me one is usually enough. Man #2: Ok. Here you go.
Man #1: Do you have aspirin? Man #2: I have here ibuprofen,
acetaminophen, hydrocodon, oxycodon.... Man #1: Are you a drug dealer?
Man #2: No. Why do you ask? Man #1: I simply asked for aspirin
and you offered me opioids. Why do you have so many drugs?
Man #2: You never know.
Man #1: Help! I need the police. Someone stole my wallet! Someone simply took it out of my pocket.
Voice from Off Camera: Call 110! Police Officer: Did you see
who took your wallet? Man #1: Yes. He wore white gloves
and a yellow hat with the letter W. He also had a big handlebar mustache. His pants were
a purple pair of overalls and his shoes were green. Police Officer: Wario stole your wallet?
Man #1: You know this man?!? Get him! Police Officer: *He rolls his eyes.
Man #1: *He throws up. Man #2: Are you ok, Fred?
Man #1: No. I just threw up. Man #2: Hmmm. Did you eat something bad?
Man #1: No. Man #2: Are you sick?
Man #1: No. Man #2: Did you see something disgusting?
Man #1: Yes... Man #2: What?
Man #1: Your face! Hahahahaha. Man #2: I hate you.