(classical music)
- P-U-S-I-L-L-A-N-I-M-O-U-S.
Pusillanimous.
- Sit down.
I am the new spelling judge,
appointed by the Trump administration.
I'm just here to implement some new rules.
Due to unfair harassment from the dishonest news media,
Executive Order Number 232 states
however the Trump administration
spells a word is now the way
that word must be spelled, effective now.
Next kid, you're up.
Your word is honored.
- Honored.
H-O-N-O-R-E-D.
- Wrong!
Wrong, you're wrong.
It's now H-O-N-E-R-E-D.
Next!
Sit down.
Your word is attacker.
- What is the origin?
- White House Press Release.
- Can you use it in a sentence?
- I'm not here to hold your hand, okay?
Just spell the word.
- Attacker.
A-T-T-A-C--
- Nope!
Nope, sit down.
Theresa, as in Theresa May.
- Theresa.
T-H-E-R--
- No, okay?
Just because Theresa May spells her name with an H,
doesn't mean she's right.
Phoenix.
- P-H-O-E--
- No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
It's not hard, okay?
Phone-ix.
- P-A-I-D.
- No!
- J-U-D-G-M--
- Wrong.
- H-E-R-E--
- Nope.
- T-E-N-N-E-S-S--
- No!
Sit, no.
- I-N-S-T-I-N-C-T.
- Wrong, bye-bye.
- D-U-M-B-E-R.
- No, little dumber.
Ridiculous.
- R-E-D-I-C-U-L-O-U-S.
"Rediculous."
- That is correct.
- Enough!
Enough!
That's not how you spell ridiculous!
- That's how you spell it now, okay?
That's how Trump spells it, that's how you spell it.
- No, words have an agreed spelling!
- Okay, look, the President of the United States
is the President of the English language.
- He's not the President of words!
No!
No, you're fake news!
- No, you're fake news, sir!
- [Man] You're fake news! - [Judge] You're fake news.
- You're fake news.
- I don't even think you're in this room,
because you're so fake.
- No, I am in this room, and I am here, and you are fake.
- [Judge] No, hey, I'm sorry,
you better sit down before I kick your kid, and all--
(beep)
For the win.
Your word is tap.
And here's a sentence.
- But I never asked for a sentence.
- Shut up, I want everyone to hear this anyways.
"How low has President Obama gone to tap my phones,
"during this very sacred election process?
"This is Nixon Watergate.
"Bad, or sick guy."
(dramatic music)
- Tap.
- T-A-P...
P.
- That is correct, congratulations, you are the winner,
you are complacent now, I'm very proud of you.
(camera shutter clicks)