- Hey you, my name is Thomas TomSka Ridgewell
and welcome back to
- Tnetnoo.
- Sure why not.
(beeping)
Why have you drawn us kissing?
(Ben laughing)
Why do you do this?
Today I am here with Ben Wonchop Smallman.
Ben, if you don't know, is the animator of the asdfmovies
and also a bunch of other things, Crash Zoom,
just all that stuff really.
He's great.
And also my longest standing friend.
Well, longest surviving friend.
(laughing)
That seems more like a threat than anything else.
Because Ben is the animator of asdfmovie, Crash Zoom
and a number of other things,
he thought it would be fun if today I animated
and he wrote the jokes.
So today we're going to be making a brand new asdfmovie,
unofficial, non canonical, that Ben's going to be writing,
and I'm going to be animating,
and it's going to go really well
because as we all know I am best animator.
So what's our first joke, Ben?
- Uh, girl tells her gal pals,
"That man's got a dick like a horse."
And then it cuts to a guy riding on a giant censored dick
like a horse going
(tongue clicking)
And he's like "Morning ladies."
- Two things Ben.
One, thank you for drawing something
that has five characters,
one of them being a giant penis.
And two, thank you for just that joke in general.
Ben, god damn it.
(both laughing) Tom, just animate on the fly.
This will be a good video idea, you fucking idiot.
Girl one is like, oh shit.
I only know how to draw girl hair one way.
Bob, bob.
(Ben laughing)
Right, now, now.
I used to draw these myself, okay?
I used to, I used to do things.
How does one draw a boob?
Well that's why I'm glad I can't draw
because if I could I'd just draw boobs all the time.
Oh man, these tits look bad dude.
These are some bad tits.
Oh no.
Oh no, oh no.
What are you doing now?
What is that?
What are you doing?
- Please sponsor us Activision.
- What?
I've made it worse.
Oh god.
Ben, we did it.
We drew a wom.
- A wom!
You know what, I can't be bothered to do that hair again so.
- Give her a Mohawk.
- What I'm going to do is I'm going to Ariana Grande her.
- I have no idea how Ariandee Lassay is.
- Cool.
Again, honestly, honestly, it could have gone a lot worse.
We'll take our reference layer.
Delete it.
Fuck!
(Ben laughing) Okay I may have deleted everything.
Tada!
(vocalizing)
That looks really shit, Ben.
So what's the whole line?
- He's got a dick like a horse.
- Now Ben, when in asdfmovie have we ever alluded to
penises or said the word 'dick'?
- Yeah, well this is DarkSquidge channel
so, we can dick jokes. - I mean, you're not wrong.
I'm literally going to do this all one layer
because I don't have time to care about anything.
What does a hand pointing look like?
(Ben grunts)
Thank you.
- Demonetized.
- Couple fingers.
(both laughing)
It does.
I've just drawn a penis.
It's a finger!
You know what, fuck you, okay, it's a really good hand.
You know what we need, Ben?
- Save it.
- Oh god, you're so right.
(Ben laughing)
You're so right.
All right we're ready to move on with our lives.
So.
- So this one you're basically just gotta draw
a man riding a big censored bar.
(Tom sighing)
- Cowboy hat is like a butt.
- It basically looks like a penis but with squishy balls.
(both laughing)
- I mean now I guess I can kind of see it.
It's like I have to concede on that point.
It does look a bit like a very short penis
with very squishy balls.
(both laughing)
You know what?
I thought he was actually looking pretty good
and now it doesn't.
- All bad on the butt jokes.
- You're not wrong.
But I hate you.
Wait so is he actually riding his own penis?
- Yes. - Oh!
- He's riding his dick like a horse.
- I thought it was just like-
- That's why he has a dick like a horse.
His dick is like a horse.
- Oh, yeah that makes much more sense.
Animating with Tom and Ben.
(clicking)
Do you reckon this looks like a foot, Ben?
- Yeah. - You know what that means?
It's time for moving tool.
(vocalizing)
Yay! Moving tool AKA, get me the fuck out
of this bad situation I've drawn.
So I feel like we need to add a little more penis.
So here's our cowboy.
- He's gotta tip his hat. - Yeah, no, I will get there.
So that would be this hand.
Wait would it be, yeah.
- And this will prove us a testament as to
why I never write any of the jokes in asdfmovie.
- Hey now.
- Except for that one thing in the deleted scenes.
- Yeah, you did the "you know who's gay, us."
And that was a funny joke Ben.
- Yeah. - That was a good joke.
So, I need to give them three frames of animation.
- Just gotta sort of like go.
(grunting)
- Bingo, bongo.
(Ben grunting)
We'll have him over here.
We'll lean him back, and we'll put him over here.
Lean him forward.
(tongue clicking) Ben, I don't want to fucking alarm you
but I think we may have finished animating this scene.
You gotta dick like a horse.
(tongue clicking)
- All right, save that shit.
(Tom beatboxing)
- It took 45 minutes.
(both laughing)
Okay, I've proven I can do somewhat animations
but now let's be badder.
- Mine Turtle says, "Hello."
Parking Meter says, "Hello."
They get married.
- You know what, I love it.
I'm a big fan of that.
What is it with you and our characters getting married?
This is the second sketch you've written
in which characters get married at the end.
So, um, Mine Turtle, he looks like, oh god.
Mine Turtle is basically a mine from Worms
and the turtle from Nameless by Yotam Perel.
This is going well Ben.
Ah, you'll be happy to know that
your animator is working very hard today.
The power of editing is that not everything that I do
has to go in the video. Cool, great, every time I touch this
I some how make it a bit worse so I need to stop.
Mine Turtle, we'll have him there, he's chilling.
So what we'll do is we'll actually, at the start,
we'll have his mouth flat.
(both laughing)
No that's his face man, that's his face.
- Not canon.
- So here's our parking meter.
The parking meter, I don't know why,
I just feel like the parking meter looks inherently happy.
Ben's just clocked out.
(Ben laughing)
He's having an old doodle.
What the fucks going on there?
That's not okay.
That looks like the saddest little Mine Turtle in the world.
Hello.
Okay, and now they're getting married.
- Yes.
- So, okay I'm going to reuse the elements, I don't care.
- So who's going to be the bride?
- I mean, it can really only be the parking meter because-
- He's tall enough.
- Yeah, well we can't like show a veil on the other one.
How do you draw a veil?
I have no idea what a veil looks like honestly.
- Yeah just do that and give him a tiny little dress.
- That's what a top hat looks like right?
I think you had like flowers right, like a flower trellis.
Okay that's like this, right?
- The only word I've heard that is
- I've drawn another penis.
(Ben laughing)
That was supposed to be flowers
and I've drawn another penis.
No you know what, that's the wedding.
There you go, that's what a wedding looks like.
So what I want to do, and you're going to hate me for this.
- Yeah.
- Is I want us to do a little lesson in the rule of thirds.
So what I'm going to do is I'm going to
pull these thirds onto here
because the brain like it.
The brain like it when the thing on the third.
(classical music)
Hello.
They're getting married.
All right!
That's another one down.
Give me a low five.
(slapping)
Nice.
- Guy number one, "You looking fine."
Guy number two who's line art is set
to naught point five width,
"Hey, thanks for noticing."
(Tom sighing)
Because he's fine.
- I get it.
- Art joke.
- Ben I am noticing a theme that literally 100% of these
are involving people flirting with each other.
Guy number one, he's cool right?
- Yeah.
- He's like, "aye, you looking fine."
So he's like
(tongue clicking)
Right?
Is that good?
- Yeah. - Looks like he's aiming a gun
but he forgot to bring the gun.
This is the best thing I have ever drawn.
You know what we need?
Smooth, smooth, smooth, smooth, smooth.
Oh, I've made it much worse.
(both laughing)
Undo, undo, undo, undo, undo.
That hand looks fucking terrible, but hey.
- Now. - You're.
- An. - All.
- Star.
- This looks like a fucking travesty if I'm honest.
Aye, you looking fine.
Pizza, pizza, forget about it.
How come this is the best asdf man
I've drawn for this one so far?
He's a friend and a boy.
That's actually too thin,
I don't think people are going to be able to see it
on the screen.
- Yeah, that'll do.
- That reads, yeah.
And that's another one down.
- Yeah.
(applause)
Girl tells her gal pal,
"That horse has got a dick like a man."
And the horse's penis, which looks like the cow says,
"Yes, I have real penis, you want to go skateboards?"
- Yeah man.
- I mean you can copy and paste.
- Oh, I'm gonna. Oh you know I'm going to
cut some fucking corners tonight Ben.
First of all, boom, who cares.
Thank you frame.
Right. So, we've gotta draw a horse.
Now Ben, thank you for picking the thing
I am singularly the worst at drawing in the god damn world.
So, horse, horse, here we go.
Here we go, here's a horse.
Here's a horse.
Okay, that went well.
Now, Ben, does this look like a fucking horse to you.
- Well I mean, if you-
- It better do because this is the horse you're getting.
I will draw my horse, my way.
Honestly, like I have actually surprised myself.
(Ben laughing)
Like if you had to be like, "What animal is this?"
I genuinely feel like most people
would accurately guess horse.
Honestly, I've fucking blown myself away here.
I went in with very low standards and they were met.
I just forgot the tail needs a big funny funny bum.
You know what, I feel like the dick needs
to already just be there.
Is this truly your vision?
- You can just make him go, "Ladies."
(laughing)
- I'm going to hold you to that
and you're rewritten your own joke now.
Look it's a little stubby penis hat, okay?
(Ben laughing)
You don't know me.
I'm an artiste.
Oh god, that's not an arm.
That's also not an arm.
I'm very good at identifying things that aren't arms.
- Ma'am. - Ma'am.
(laughing)
- Another one has bitten the dust.
- Guy one, "I'm so angry I think I might explode."
Guy A melts.
Guy B says, "What a twist."
- Yeah, okay, cool.
Guy one, Guy A and Guy B.
(Ben laughing)
- Iconic.
I didn't realize that.
- I'm going to copy the way you draw asdf men, Ben
even though that's absolutely not
how I would draw them standing up.
(Tom exhales) Okay, is there a way to just flip an element.
Wow!
So, is that how you just do these?
With just little eyebrows?
I'm so angry I could melt.
All right so I've made our guy, he's very angry.
This guy is more chill.
He's our chill boy.
Okay.
So now for the fun part. Onion skinning.
- Hooray. - Hooray.
All right so, to get that feeling like he's melting
I'm going to start getting him bowing wider.
This looks like he's melting, right?
I'm doing a very good job with this melt.
The problem with animation is that
I'm going to spend so much time on this guy melting
and it's going to come to exactly like
not even half a second's worth of animation.
Like this one I'm actually trying with.
I'd like one to be at least like
no, Tom's not completely fucking useless.
(singing) One more frame.
Whoa.
Oh god, I'm so nearly done.
Yeah, I did it.
- Yeah!
- Ben I did it.
- You melty boy.
- Yeah, I did it, Ben.
I'm proud of myself.
- Hooray. - Done.
- I'm retiring.
- I drew Donkey Kang. - You did draw Donkey Kong.
You sure hecking did Ben.
Ah, all right Ben, so how do you feel
your first asdfmovie went?
You proud of yourself?
You shouldn't be.
(Ben laughing) None of us should be proud of ourselves.
Thank you very much for helping me make this asdfmovie Ben.
Now, let's see what we've created.
(slapping)
(static)
- That man's got a dick like a horse.
(tongue clicking)
- Ma'am.
(bright music)
(static)
- Hello.
(dramatic music)
(static)
- Hey, you looking fine.
- You noticed.
(static)
- That horse has got a dick like a man.
- Ma'am.
(static)
- I'm so angry I could explode.
(static)