By the end of this video,
I'm going to give you six things to look out for.
Hey there, I'm Rebecca Zung.
When you are dealing with a narcissist and
you are getting ready to go to court, you better look out.
I am an attorney and I have seen it,
I've been dealing with narcissists in court for more than 20 years and
I can tell you that when you're in a relationship with a narcissist,
you are either for them, or you are against them,
and when you are in that discard phase of a relationship,
they go into you are against them situation,
now you become public enemy number one.
So, now you're against them.
So, now gloves are off and they want to take you down,
they want to take you down
before you have a chance to take them down.
So, they want to make sure they get to you right away.
They're going to act like they want to make this all amicable,
so they're going to act like they want this
to be all friendly, all nice and super good terms.
Now, the thing that I'm going to say to you is,
that they have been liars the entire relationship,
there’s a reason why
you don't want to be married to them anymore.
They haven’t been telling you the truth the whole time;
Why would they start now all the sudden being truthful to you?
They're not.
I’ve literally had to come to this conversation with my clients and
the clients just tend to be like,
“Oh, why would my lawyer be telling me the truth?”
And I'm like, “Okay”.
Well, I've had to literally get out emails with my clients and say,
“I know your soon to be ex-husband is telling you this,
here is an email I got from his lawyer today,
which is telling the opposite of what he's saying to you”.
It's so mind- blowing to me,
but they say they want to be amicable,
but they're doing that because
they're trying to trick you into signing something.
They're going to say,
“You don't need a lawyer, we can do this on our own”,
or something like that,
but it's just to try to trick you into signing something,
Don't do it people!!
They're going to try to get you to settle early,
they're going to try to get between you and your lawyer,
because they don't want you to get a lawyer
because they don't want this person to have control over you.
So, they're going to say your lawyer is bad,
they're going to say that your lawyer is a shyster,
or your lawyer is too busy,
or that your lawyer is in some way not good.
Because they don't want this person to have control over you.
They're going to lie in the pleadings,
you're going to get this petition and
it's going to be like,
“Wow, I can't believe they said all this stuff”,
just don't be shocked,
because they’re just going to say all kinds of crap,
don't be shocked,
they’re going to say whatever they’re going to say.
You're going to feel the need to go insane,
but they literally will lie and
say whatever they're going to say,
they will lie right in court documents, they will.
They will ignore court orders too, by the way,
just blatantly ignore them.
That happens.
They'll say things like,
that they're going to take your kids away from you,
they're going to say things with no basis in fact or law.
There have been so many times that
I've had people come into my office and say like,
“I'm afraid that I'm going to be out on the streets”,
or something like that,
or that “They're going to take my house away from me”,
so many times these things have no basis in fact or law,
but I'll tell you something,
you really need early on to get your leverage over the narcissist,
I would definitely check out my video
on “Get leverage over the narcissist”,
because you do want to do that early on.
So check out my video on that.
Including withholding evidence, certain parts of discovery and
they’ll start moving money around,
they have no scruples,
they have no conscience about that,
they will definitely do that,
whatever they can get away with, they will do.
All right, so that is number four.
By the way, it's so time to slay the narc, right?
I mean, S.L.A.Y is my program,
is strategy, leverage, anticipate, focus on you.
It is so time to slay the narc.
File ridiculous motions, file pleadings,
use the court system to get at you,
just to make your life miserable,
they use that as a another way of getting supply.
So, whatever supply they were getting from you
during the relationship,
their now going to trade that,
by getting supply by just making you miserable now and
they use the court system as their sword,
as a way of getting supply.
So, filing motions, filing false motions sometimes,
filing whatever crap pleadings they can come up with,
they will definitely do.
They line up they’re flying monkeys against you,
this is the discard phase,
this is where you definitely see the birth of the smear campaign,
they will line up those flying monkeys against you,
including the children if they can, really sad,
but if they can, they'll start using the children
to kind of get them to be on their side against you,
to say things against you,
but especially other people as well.
I mean, they started to plant those seeds early on,
maybe even months ago, agaisnt you.
“Oh, so-and-so has a drinking problem”,
or “Oh, so-and-so is very irresponsible with the kids”,
or something like that.
Maybe they started to say things against you a long time ago,
if they knew that this was kind of brewing and coming.
So anyway, lining up those people against you,
to make it look like they're wonderful,
and you're the bad one.
That's what they will do, is a form of bullying.
So, anyway, those are six things to look out for
when you are in a court battle with a narcissist.
If you guys are in a court battle with a narcissist,
you probably have seen it.
But those are six things to look out for,
if you are in a court battle with a narcissist,
so, just to recap,
if you're in a court battle with a narcissist,
they will try to get you to settle early,
they're going to make it look like they want it to be amicable,
they'll say that you don't need a lawyer and
they try to get you off to the side,
they try to get you to settle early,
make it look like they're on your side,
but it's really just a ploy and when that doesn't work,
they just start right into playing dirty.
They will lie in pleadings and ignore court orders.
The next thing to watch out for,
during court battles with a narcissist,
is that they will threaten you
with things that are totally false and
have no basis in fact or law.
Don't be scared.
I mean, really just do your fact checking,
even if you can't afford an attorney all the time, by the way,
maybe use an attorney to consult with sometimes,
because a lot of times, it's just scare tactics.
So, that's the third thing to look out for
during court battles with a narcissist.
Don't be afraid, so many times,
after people have done their initial consultations with me,
they've been like, “Oh my God, I feel so much better”,
because they just realized they're trying to bully them.
And the fourth thing to look out for,
during court battles with a narcissist,
is that they manipulate evidence,
they will manipulate text messages,
they will manipulate photographs.
This is why, by the way,
I say to use one form of communication and
I really prefer it to be email, or a court-approved app,
because they're less likely to be manipulated and
they do have a time and date stamp.
So, that's the fourth thing to look out for
during court battles with a narcissist.
The fifth thing to look out for,
is that they will use the court system as a sword,
they will use the court system as a sword,
they will file false motions, they will file false pleadings,
or it doesn't even have to be false, by the way,
they can just file this crazy stuff,
just to make your life miserable, just to generate paperwork,
just to push the attorney's fees up,
just to make it expensive,
just to try to push you into wanting to settle,
just to try to get you back into the first thing I said,
get you to settle for something less than what you're entitled to,
because you're just dead tired,
or you just feel like you can't go on anymore,
because they've basically bullied you into it.
So, that’s the fifth thing to look out for
during court battles with a narcissist.
Then, the sixth thing to look out for,
is lining up those flying monkeys,
that smear campaign, using other people against you,
lining up other people against you, including the children,
unfortunately, that is something they’ll try to do.
But, if you know early on this is going to be coming,
that this is going to be happening,
you can get ready,
you can start to get your leverage ready,
you can start to get your strategy ready and
you can win because they are liars, they're lazy and
they do leave a trail behind them and
because they are one-trick ponies,
this is far as needing that narcissistic supply,
while they're horrible and heinous to deal with,
you definitely can come up with a strategy, the leverage and
you can anticipate what they're going to do,
so that you can absolutely,
you absolutely can win with the right framework,
you absolutely can win every single time,
so you need to have the right mindset though.
The best lawyers can't help you
if you don't think that you can win and
whatever strategy you have, the best leverage you have,
if you don't feel like you can win,
then nobody can help you.
So, you have to have everything put together,
organized the right way and documented the right way.
So, that's what I help you do with my S.L.A.Y program.
If you are getting ready to negotiate with a narcissist,
make sure you start with my free
“Crush my negotiation” prep worksheet,
at winmynegotiation.com
you can get it right there and
make sure that you have subscribed to this channel,
if you haven't done so already.
Subscribe, hit that notification bell,
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Make sure that you share this video,
so other people can get this information as well,
because I'm on a mission here,
as I always say, I'm on a mission, a crusade,
I want everybody to have access to this information,
because it's time to stop the drama, trauma and chaos.
It's time for people to be able
to have access to this information all over the world.
We are here to shut down narcissists everywhere.
Remember, today's a great day to start negotiating your best life.
I will see all of you guys in the next video.