NOW 2020 IS ALMOST OVER.
AND I THINK IT'S SAFE TO SAY NOW, 2020 IS ALMOST OVER AND I
THINK IT'S SAFE TO SAY IT'S BEEN A VERY, VERY, VERY LONG YEAR.
THE LONGEST YEAR.
SO LONG, IN FACT, THAT YOU MIGHT HAVE LOST TRACK OF
EVERYTHING THAT HAPPENED IN THE PAST 12 MONTHS.
SO IN CASE YOU NEED A QUICK REFRESHER ON 2020, LET ME BREAK
IT DOWN FOR YOU REAL QUICK.
TRUMP WAS IMPEACHED, BUT IT DIDN'T STICK.
"PARASITE" WON THE OSCARS BEST PIC.
MEGHAN AND HARRY MOVED TO L.A.
MR. PEANUT WAS NOT OKAY.
J.LO SHOWED OFF HER SUPER BOWL RANGE.
TOM HANKS GOT SICK.
THEN EVERYTHING CHANGED.
SOURDOUGH BREAD GOT US INSTAGRAM LIKES.
QUARANTINE BEARDS MADE OUR FRIENDS SAY "YIKES."
"ANIMAL CROSSING" WAS A BLOCKBUSTER GAME.
ELON MUSK HAD A BABY-- WAIT, WHAT WAS HIS NAME?
AUNT BECKY MADE A GUILTY PLEA.
I STILL DON'T UNDERSTAND QUIBI.
TWITTER FINALLY CHECKED SOME FACTS.
ZUCKERBERG REMAINS AN ASS.
TOOBIN HAD A ZOOM ERECTION.
I WILL NOT KIDNAP ONE DIRECTION.
TIKTOK DANCES WERE ENORMOUS.
NOT TO MENTION MURDER HORNETS.
A T.P. SHORTAGE LEFT US ALL FEELING CURSED, BECAUSE 2020 HAS
BEEN THE ABSOLUTE WORST!
"TIGER KING" BECAME OUR LATEST OBSESSION-- STILL WAITING ON
CAROLE BASKIN'S CONFESSION.
"NORMAL PEOPLE" ON HULU SET OUR HEARTS BEATING.
"THE UNDOING" FINALE HAD EVERYONE TWEETING.
"THE QUEEN'S GAMBIT" PAID OFF IN SPADES.
"THE CROWN'S" DIANA LACED UP HER BLADES.
"SCHITT'S CREEK" WAS THIS YEAR'S BIG EMMY WINNER.
SOMEHOW SARAH PALIN WAS ON "THE MASKED SINGER."
THEY DELAYED "JAMES BOND: NO TIME TO DIE," IT SHOULD BE IN
"HAMILTON" MADE ITS STREAMING DEBUT; SO DID "MY WIIIIIFE" IN
WITH SO MANY STREAMERS, YOU JUST CAN'T GO WRONG-- YOU CAN
START BY WATCHING YOUR BOY IN "THE PROM!"
THE LAKERS WON AND HONORED KOBE.
THE DODGERS GOT THEIR SERIES TROPHY.
GRONK AND BRADY REUNITED.
THE WEEKND BLINDED ALL THE LIGHTS.
BTS WAS "DYNAMITE."
BEYONCÉ TOLD US "BLACK IS KING."
PARENTS GOOGLED, "WHAT DOES 'WAP' MEAN?"
HARRY STYLES TOPPED THE CHARTS.
DUA LIPA SAID "DON'T START."
TAYLOR DROPPED A DOUBLE-WHAMMY.
EILISH WON, LIKE, ALL THE GRAMMYS.
VERZUZ BATTLES LIT UP OUR SCREENS.
DOLLY HELPED FUND THE COVID VACCINE.
SHAWN MENDES WAS THE ONE AND ONLY, WHILE BIEBER WAS SO
"LOOO-OOO-OOO-ONELY."
LADY GAGA "RAINED ON ME."
STALLION WAS STILL MEGAN THEE.
LIVE MUSIC WAS CANCELLED, OR SO IT SEEMS-- EXCEPT FOR THE GUY
WHO HAD "CRANBERRY DREAMS!" ON ELECTION NIGHT, TRUMP WAS
FINALLY DEFEATED.
IT'S ALMOST JANUARY, HE STILL HASN'T CONCEDED.
FROM VOTER FRAUD LAWSUITS THERE'S JUST NO ESCAPING.
THE PARKING LOT AT FOUR SEASONS TOTAL LANDSCAPING.
AS THE NEW VEEP, KAMALA MADE HISTORY.
HOW JOE BROKE HIS FOOT IS STILL A MYSTERY.
MIKE PENCE'S HEAD WAS HOME TO A FLY; GIULIANI'S HAIR WAS
DRIPPING WITH DYE.
McCONNELL'S HANDS ARE TURNING BLUE.
MELANIA HATES CHRISTMAS, TOO.
TRUMP TURNED HIS BACK ON ALL OF HIS LACKEYS, WHILE WE ALL GOT
THE HOTS FOR STEVE KORNACKI.
THE ONLY THING SCARIER THAN KELLYANNE CONWAY, WAS THAT WEEK
WHERE WE THOUGHT WE'D HAVE PRESIDENT KANYE!
DON'T GET ME WRONG, THERE'S REASON TO HOPE-- FIVE MORE
STATES ALL LEGALIZED DOPE.
THE COVID VACCINE IS NOW WITHIN REACH-- A MUCH BETTER OPTION
THAN INJECTING WITH BLEACH.
2020 DESTROYED ALL OF OUR PLANS, BUT WE CAN GET THROUGH IT BY
WASHING OUR HANDS.
LENDING NEIGHBORS ASSISTANCE AND KEEPING SOCIAL DISTANCE,
TO FLATTEN THE CURVE AND GET BACK TO THE TASK.
NEXT YEAR WILL BE BETTER-- JUST PUT ON A MASK.
MERRY CHRISTMAS TO YOU AND THOSE YOU HOLD DEAR.
HERE'S HOPING WE'LL BE TOGETHER IN PERSON NEXT YEAR!
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH GAL GADOT!