Hey guys, welcome back. Thanks for joining me this week for another video
I am so excited about this week's video because we are celebrating all the single people out there
I am so excited about this because I know Valentine's Day is coming and I wanted to make a video
Especially for the people who are single newly single
about to be single and
Really celebrate yourself know not to start this video on the debbie downer note
But you know Valentine's Day
Typically is this couple's holiday?
And I just think that there are a lot of people in this world that are in relationships
That are not good for them. They don't love their partner. Perhaps two people are cheating on each other. There's no excitement
There's no passion. There's no
Friendship. There's just two people living together and
Or just people are with each other for the wrong reasons, whatever the situation is
so the reason why I wanted to make this video is to celebrate you so this is all about
Celebrating all the girls and guys out there that are single and that are saying to themselves
You know what? I want a relationship, but I also know what I want
I know what I deserve and I'm not going to settle so for this Valentine's Day
I'm just gonna celebrate me and I'm going to enjoy
This part of my life of being single because I could meet someone tomorrow and never be single again
most importantly
This is celebrating the single men and women out there that don't feel that lack in their life that
While of course, they want to be in a relationship, of course, they want to find someone to enjoy life with that
They don't come from that lack place that they have worked so hard on
Rebuilding themselves and having this amazing life that whoever comes into their life now
Needs to add value to it and that they're not just gonna take whatever comes along
so this video is all for you guys to celebrate your single self on this Valentine's Day if you
Feel this and you embrace it or if you're new leasing and you have box of tissues with you right now
And you're crying your eyes out because you're going through this breakup. You're going through this divorce. I want to give you six reasons
Why you should embrace your single self number one, this is your time to be selfish
You are never gonna have this moment again
Like I said, you could meet someone tomorrow and it doesn't matter how old you are
this could be the person that you spend the rest of your life with so this is the time in your life where you get
To be selfish with your time your money what you want to do where you want to go?
When it's time to shut the TV off you don't have to compromise on anything. You don't have to say
Hey, do you want to do this? Hey, is it? Okay. I'm gonna you know, I'm gonna go hang out with my friends
There's just no
Conversation this is your time to be selfish in any way shape or form. So use this time to your advantage work on yourself
Love yourself
Start a hobby start a new career, you know
Just focus on you number two is I want you to set goals
And create healthy habits when we're single. We have lots of energy. We're
Hopefully the most confident in ourselves
So in this time of your life, since we're being selfish we need to inspire ourselves
We need to you know, get ourselves out of our comfort zone. Try new things set new goals
send intentions for yourself things that you want to achieve whether it's
Personally doing self development whether it's getting into shape whether it's meeting a new group of girlfriends, you know
I know Bumble has you know the app now or you can even like meet girls or guy friends like in your area
Get out there and set goals for yourself create healthy habits for yourself so you can create the life that you really want
This is about you embracing life and not letting your fears take hold of you
so life isn't gonna just happen for you that career that you've always wanted isn't just going to knock on your door and say
Okay, I'm here
Here you go
You know the group of girlfriends that you've always wanted or the basketball league that you want to join go do it
This is the time in your life where you have to push yourself
So far out of your comfort zone to create the life that you want
one of the things that I often do with my clients when they're looking to
Get a relationship or they want to do is we really focus on who is this person that you want to meet
Who is this person that you're trying to attract it in your life and most often the list that they make of this person?
I'll ask them
Do you have every single quality that you're looking for in a partner? And
Most often they don't so if you want a woman or a man that's very secure and loves themselves
And has a great life. Can you say that you are that person?
can you say that you are a secure confident person that you know who you are that you know what you want and
That you have a great life and not faking that so we often at times can say of course. I'm confident
Of course, I love my life
But do you really are there all aspects of your life that you really?
Enjoy and you're happy with right now if you can wholeheartedly say that
Amazing great good for you
But most most of us always have an area of our life that we want to improve on
So spend this time and focus on those areas
Set new intentions for yourself new habits new goals so you can become the person that you're looking to attract
The third thing is don't wait for people to make plans with you. So often especially with women I find at times
It's like they're hesitant to and men too
I think but they're just hesitant to ask people to do something
like they have a friend in the office and they're like
Oh, I really like her and I would love to go shopping with her out for dinner with her or whatever
But they're just hesitant to kind of put themselves out there. So push yourself out of your comfort zone
Don't wait for all of your married friends
To ask you to go out for dinner make it a point to say
You know what?
I'm gonna contact all my girlfriends that are married or all my guy friends that are in a relationship and I'm gonna make plans
I'm gonna you know, maybe think of a trip that I want to go on and see who wants to join me
That was something that I always did um throw and I still do it throughout my journey
I don't wait for people to always make plans with me
I schedule things that I want to do and if people want to join then that's amazing
It's just about you taking the initiative on your own life and just push yourself to have the life experiences that you want to have
regardless of
You know your relationship status the fourth thing is take care of yourself
And this really has to do with creating the healthy habits, but taking care of yourself
Buy yourself new clothes start working out. Watch what you eat exercise more get your hair done. Get your hair cut
You know go to the dentist get your teeth whitened, whatever you can do
That'll make you feel the most confident the most happy with yourself and content with yourself. Give yourself the most energy
That's what you should be doing right now
because like I said in the beginning
This is your time to focus solely on yourself and you're trying to create the best possible version of yourself
So you can attract the best in someone else the best person for you. Are you taking care of yourself?
Investing in doing things like coaching, you know, if you have low self-esteem low confidence
working on possibly hiring a coach or watching videos and watching motivational speakers and
Pay the money to go to that seminar that you want to go to or that yoga retreat or whatever it is
So you can get your mind, right?
You know
the most important thing that we can give ourselves is working on our mental toughness is working on that self-talk because the
conversations that are going on inside of your head are
The reasons why you don't have the things that you have and it's gonna be the thing
That allows you to know what you want to set those goals
Set those intentions and push through that fear and that self-doubt to get to the stuff that you really want
But you have to be willing to do the work
you can't just sit back and
Want life to just hand you everything you've always wanted you have to work at it
So working at it is learning how to love yourself is focusing every single day. Okay, what are the thoughts that I'm thinking?
I'm gonna be mindful every day of my inner dialogue and that's my most important goal
And thing that I want to achieve for me, I went through a period where it's all I did
It's all I focused on as much as I could throughout the day
Of course, I had to go to work and take care of my son and do the things that I had to do
but any other point in the day and I wasn't dating I wasn't doing anything I
Wanted to be single and just focus on me. Learn how to love myself for the first time. Learn how to have healthy
Dialogue and it meant reading books doing seminars investing in coaching, you know focusing so much on
what are the thoughts that I'm thinking and
Working on that inner dialogue that takes a lot of work
but the work that you do in that area of your life that
personal development that affects every single aspect of your life
it affects the goal the career you want to go after the jobs you want to apply for the friends that you have the
relationships with your family members it
Hugely impacts the partner that you're gonna attract into your life
So focusing on yourself right now is so so important
number five is don't focus on what you don't have focus on what you do have so it's very easy to just
Especially in the day and age that we live in you know
It's it's Valentine's Day is coming up and all of these cards and you know
Commercials of a man giving a woman a diamond bracelet or whatever kay jewel or whatever
It's easy to go into the place of lack go into the place of like wow. I don't have anyone it's the holidays
Well, I don't have anyone. It's New Years Eve. Why don't I mean one?
It's Valentine's Day why we don't have anyone to go on a trip with
it's like it's very easy to just get back into that that
you know way of thinking but you have to push past all of that and say
Me not having someone on Valentine's Day does not define me and it doesn't
Equal my happiness, like getting a card and some chocolates and some roses and just being able to say
Oh, I have someone that's not enough for me. I want more. I want a friendship. I want a great relationship with this person
I want this person to be my best friend and even though I don't have it this year
Doesn't mean I'm never going to have it
so I'm gonna enjoy the moment that I'm in right now at this stage of my life and focus on myself and be selfish and
go on a trip if I want to go on one and have all my girlfriend's come with me or
Even some new people that I just met in the office
Maybe come with me and enjoy my life. One of the best places to be is when you really
authentically
Honestly, love your life by yourself
When you're at that place, it's almost like that saying that people tell you when you're not looking is when it's gonna happen
You know that type of thing when you really really like your life
You know that you've done so much work on yourself
In order to have this life that you really love and you've built this great community and these new friendships or whatever, right?
There's new career anything that you've you know created for yourself that you did this work when you get to that place
You will be so picky as to who comes into your life
You'll be able to spot abusive people very very easily
You'll be able to spot people that are not right for you because you know how you want to feel
You're on such a high from your own life that anyone that comes and brings you off that high
You know is not right for you
and that's a great place to be because
It's not that you're too
picky
Like some of your friends and family will like to say and I have so many clients that constantly tell me
Well, my parents think I'm too picky
My friends think I'm too picky and that's just outside noise that you have to just completely ignore
This is about you being in a great space
so you can attract a great person and you're not going to attract a great healthy person unless you are a healthy person yourself and
The last thing which is probably repetitive but it is what it is. Enjoy being single
Enjoy going on dates. Don't look at every single date that you do go on as oh my god. Is this the person?
Oh my god, is this it? Like do I like him? Does he have a weird towel?
Like don't overthink anything just enjoy the moment live in the moment of what you're doing with this person
Whether it's a first date a second date a third date whether you're going out to the movies on Valentine's Day with your girlfriend
True happiness is living in
This moment because quite frankly, that's all you have
You don't know what's gonna happen to you tomorrow
And you can't worry about what happened to you in the past because you can't go there and live that experience again
All you have is right now and if you live your life in these small moments
That's where the happiness lies and when you're going on dates and you're not overthinking is this person right for me?
Is this it and you're just so in your head, but you're just having a good time and just enjoying life
That's that's true. That's on that's truly authentic. That's someone that
Isn't worrying isn't fear. If there's no one security there's nothing that this person's thinking. They're just living in the moment enjoying life
That's the happy person that we see that we want to be around that that energy is contagious. So I hope that this video
Has helped you guys to embrace your single selves
I hope that you have a wonderful Valentine's Day do something for
Yourself, whether that's buy yourself a gift whether that's pamper yourself do something that's self loving and be good to yourself on that day
So whenever you have a thought of like look at me and by myself
You need to tell that thought to take a hike and just repeat over and over again
This doesn't define me and I'm not gonna be alone forever. So I'm gonna enjoy this day to myself
So again, I hope that that has helped you
If you have liked this video
Please give it a thumbs up comment down below on what you are gonna be doing for yourself
This Valentine's Day and I will see you next week