For the last 10 years, our first guests
have made Modern Family one of the funniest shows on TV.
Please welcome Ed O'Neil, Sofia Vergara, Ty Burrell,
Julie Bowen, Jesse Tyler Ferguson, and Eric Stonestreet.
[APPLAUSE]
This is going to be a problem.
Uh-oh, why?
Oh.
That's nice.
Yeah, very nice.
Are you crying?
No, I'm not crying.
You're tearing up.
You're crying?
No, I'm not crying.
I think that's sweet.
That's very nice.
It's a wonderful welcome.
Thank you.
Didn't have any more couches.
How are you?
Good.
You want a sip of water?
Yes, please.
All right.
Yeah.
Oh, we don't get water either?
They don't get water.
Yeah, no.
We don't get coffee.
That's the question.
We don't get real coffee.
Are you still complaining about Colombian coffee?
Because you always fake it and give us water in a cup.
If someone requests coffee, we give them coffee.
Then give us a glass of water, but not a cup of water.
All right.
Do you see what we've been dealing with?
Oh, I know.
For 10 years.
10 years.
Speaking of that, so 10 years ago, really, Ed was the guy--
Super famous.
He was younger.
Yes.
Yeah.
And younger.
Sure.
Hang in there, dad.
So what did-- do you remember first impressions?
What did you-- when you were there,
what was your first thought?
I was nervous, because of course,
to work with all American people, and--
Aw, thank you.
Yeah.
We aren't all American.
But the moment I saw all of them, I'm like,
this is going to be great.
Everybody was like, amazing.
Right away.
Yeah.
I was wrong, but I--
And what did you think?
The first time that I met everybody was at the table
read.
You know, we have these table reads.
And--
The reads.
At a table.
So we're reading the pilot.
We're reading the script.
And so I sat down, and I looked around, and I waved
and I thought, I don't know anybody here.
I don't know anybody.
None of these people are famous.
None of them are famous.
So you thought it was going to be your show.
No, I thought it was going to be no show.
But anyway, we started reading.
And when I read, I don't act it out.
I'm more or less just reading it.
Yeah.
So for the writers.
And anyway, two or three minutes in, I started going,
like, who are these people?
It was like, they were so good.
Yeah.
And the kids, everybody was so good.
I thought, whoa, maybe we have a shot here.
Yeah, because they weren't just reading.
They were acting.
That's what you're supposed to do.
We were trying.
It gives them a sense of if it's working or not.
Since we were nobodys, we needed to impress.
He didn't.
That's right.
Exactly, exactly.
What do you remember, Eric?
Well, I remember thinking, wow, I'm
potentially going to be friends with Al Bundy, which
was really, really cool.
And, you know--
Ed saw the pilot, I think, before any of us did,
because he's Ed.
And I got a call on my phone that was unavailable
and I answered.
And I had friends in the car and I said hello.
He's like, Eric.
Ed O'Neill.
I'm like, hey, Ed.
How are you?
He's like, listen.
If this show doesn't go on for 10 years,
I don't know what the hell I'm doing in this business.
That was the first thing he said after he saw the pilot.
But--
You were right.
I was excited.
And then I was just really trying
hard not to get fired for staring at Sofia.
I remember when she walked into the table read,
I was just like, oh my goodness!
Nope, nope, nope, nope.
I can't look.
I'll get busted.
I was young and fresh back then, 10 years ago.
That actually was my first impression of Eric,
having only read the script, knowing
he was playing Cam, a gay man.
I sat down next to him, and Sofia was two down from us,
and he goes, well, she's not ugly.
Oh, you're very straight.
You're a very straight man.
And then Eric would keep asking me, he's like, nothing?
Nothing, Jesse?
I'll be like, she's great.
She's lovely.
She's a really nice person.
I'm not sexually attracted to her.
But you feel nothing?
Nothing at all?
No.
I can't believe they were talking about me like that.
Yeah.
Really, you can't believe that?
I could not believe it.
No respect.
Shocking.
So Julie, you were pregnant.
I was pregnant, and I felt something for Sofia.
You can feel lots of things.
I was very pregnant with twins, and it was actually my birthday
with the table read.
Which, I hate my birthday, and I wanted
to just get out of there before anybody
noticed that I was the least talented of this crew.
Oh.
And-- no, I was terrified.
Dry mouth, sweaty palms.
I used to grab Ty underneath the table all the time.
By the way, I'm pretending to be giving her solace.
Meanwhile, I'm equally terrified.
I was very nervous.
It's going to be fine.
I was very nervous, and I thought--
Sofia, that's me hiding the two babies in my belly.
Look at the--
Wow.
Dear God.
But when Julie-- I didn't know she
was pregnant until she got up from the table,
because you couldn't tell at all.
Here, nothing.
It was like, perfection.
What I remember about Sofia is she
was wearing this very chic--
I thought she was going to be more like Gloria,
more like cha-cha.
And then she was wearing this very chic, like,
off-the-shoulder, and I was like she has an enormous--
Bosom?
Bosom.
How does she keep it all there?
And she said to me right away, "You
should see the rig I have under here."
And she had this, like, a homemade freaking contraption
on.
I was very impressed.
Homemade contraption.
But she was a girl's girl right away.
By the way, bosom.
I mean, literally, you've been on this show for 10 years
and your accent has gotten worse.
How is that possible?
Well, it's a talent, you know?
It really is.
I have made a commitment with myself
that I am going to be Gloria, a very thick Latin-spoken woman.
A thick Latin.
Yes, you sure have.
It's gotten worse and worse over the years.
I can barely understand you.
All right, we're going to take a break
and see who does the best impression, because I'm sure
you all--
Oh, no!
We have fun together.
You sure do.
And it really is consistent.
I say it every time one of you is here.
And it's so nice to have all of you together,
but it really is consistently brilliant writing,
and all of you together are so funny.
I hope this goes on many more years.
Do we know--
Why can't it be like a Law and Order?
Yes, it should.
That's a good question.
It should be like a Law and Order.
Somebody dies every week.
Every single week.
Well--
Or like an Ellen DeGeneres.
We're like, this is 16 years.
Couldn't it go 16 years for you?
Why not?
Yes, I think it should.
I accept that.
All right, before the break, we were talking
about Sofia Vergara's accent.
And who does the best Sofia Vergara?
Julie.
I think it's Julie.
Julie.
Really?
I just do it a lot.
It doesn't mean it's good.
It just means that--
a higher volume of words come out
of my mouth than most people.
But you have to give me, like, a topic.
Yes, because it comes natural to her.
Yeah, oh, it comes so natural to me.
And of course, all I can think of is disgusting things.
Oh, she said today, she goes, "What are you
going to wear for Ellen?
And I said, "You know, I'm going to wear--" She goes,
"Is it cocktail?"
And I said, "Well, I'm wearing, like, trousers."
"But cocktail."
Great.
Yeah.
And then she goes, "I will wear something tight and like
a Dolce maybe, but it will have fruit on it or flowers
so you know it's for the day.
It's a cocktail."
And she did.
That's amazing.
I don't know why it sounds like that, but I did tell her that.
And you were right.
"Is it cocktail?"
That's one that she always asks.
Yeah.
Why would daytime be cocktail?
I mean--
"Not full length, you know, not black."
I don't know why I always hear cocktail.
This is not a cocktail dress.
It's not like a gown, but it's not like a sporty thing.
Right.
Like what you're wearing.
Is this cocktail, Ed?
This is definitely cocktail.
This is Ed.
This is shrimp cocktail.
This is going to the supermarket.
This is 60s and very comfortable.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And this is Ed.
I love Ed so much.
So you were texting, because you all are on a text chain, right?
Oh, yeah.
So all of you text chain all the time.
And do you get on that Ed?
I'm on it, but--
What happens?
I don't understand how it works.
Yeah.
You just text.
I-- I read them.
There are many of them, often.
And then I hesitate--
Because he doesn't read them often,
so once he starts reading, there's been a long--
Lots of them.
And then he'll respond three days later, like, yes.
Like, I don't know what the question was anymore.
What is this, or something?
Eric, you know what happened.
Yeah.
And then he'll subtext me and say, Eric,
who's the 818454 number?
And I'll be like--
It's your castmate.
That's Sarah.
And he goes, now, which one is she?
I don't do that.
He doesn't do that.
No, he doesn't do that.
But he will ask, like, I don't have all these numbers.
Somebody switched their numbers.
And I can't imagine what your texts sound like,
because they-- do they sound like--
Ja ja ja ja ja.
Ya.
Hilarious.
I want to show, before we go to break,
I want to show a picture, and I want
to see if you know who this.
This is, how old?
16?
Oh, 11.
11?
Oh my God.
No.
No, that's Julie.
That's Sofia.
It's Sofia.
I saw this, and I was like, let me show you
what I was like at 11.
You will not mistake us.
This is like your son.
That's little monkey face.
It looks like your son.
See, that's an example.
Sofia always fits the funniest last thing.
Yeah.
I know, that's Sofia.
It looks like Julie.
But why, do you think I look sexy in that picture?
You look beautiful.
Yeah, you just look beautiful.
Your breast contraption fell down, though.
It was--
I'm sure-- well, this is not fair,
because I was obviously at the photoshoot,
and she was at the farm.
I was at the farm.
This is not fair for Julie.
You know?
We're going to take a break, and we're
going to bring out the rest of the cast after this.
All right, let's bring out the rest of the cast
from Modern Family.
Please welcome Sarah Hyland, Ariel Winter, Nolan Gould,
and Rico Rodriguez.
All right, what's really fun about a show that
goes on 10 years that starts with kids
is watching how you grow up.
I mean, it's-- well, you were 18.
I was 18, and my face hasn't changed very much.
No, you're still-- I mean, because you
were playing what age?
15.
15, wow.
And you looked 15.
If you look at the beginning of the very first season--
Oh my gosh.
It's crazy, right?
Sure.
Aw.
Rico.
Look at Rico.
Wow.
But now you all have cars and you have houses,
and it's amazing.
I mean, you must have--
Rico, you must have been, like, flipping out
when you learned who your mother was.
That must have been like--
That's funny.
So when I found out who my TV parents were going to be,
my mom and dad, they're like, "Rico.
You'll never believe who is playing your dad."
I'm like, "Well, who?"
They go, "Ed O'Neill."
I was like, "Who's that?"
And they go, "You know, from that show,
Married with Children?"
I'm like, "Not ringing a bell."
They go, "OK.
[SINGING] Love and marriage."
I'm like, I'm like, "I have no idea who that is.
I'm sorry."
And then they go, "Oh, your mom is Sofia Vergara."
I go, "Oh the actress from Madea Goes to Jail?
I love her.
Oh my gosh."
But I'm more contemporary with you than Ed.
Ed is very old.
That's right.
Oh my gosh.
And then the three of you have these two for parents,
and that must be--
I mean, do you feel like they're almost
your kids, because-- didn't you teach Noah how to shave?
Yeah, it's a little like life imitating art,
art imitating life, I think.
It's like a give and take between that.
But yeah, Ty actually taught me how to shave.
He also taught Rico how to shave,
but it didn't go so well.
Yeah.
No, I didn't get the memo.
He missed a few spots.
Yeah.
So it's great, because like I said, I hope it keeps going,
because I want to see what happens with--
I mean, we've watched the family grow,
and I hope that we keep watching that.
And also, you think about all the physical activity,
especially for you, Ty, that it starts out really,
really fun, season one.
10 years in, are you still enjoying the physical stuff
they give you?
I enjoy them in the moment.
The day after is different than it used to be.
Than it used to be.
There was an episode last season on a hoverboard,
and after I kind of figured out how to do it,
I got very cocky, which is not unusual,
about something physical like that.
I felt very proud of myself and rode it all in between takes.
There were take after take after take,
and then I would just ride it around the sound stage,
like grabbing something to drink.
And I'm just assuming that that hoverboard thing
ended badly too.
Actually, I woke up the next day,
and I'm not exaggerating that I couldn't get out of bed.
But a hoverboard's the thing that just carries you.
Yeah.
There are no muscles being--
there are no muscles activated by a hoverboard.
None.
And I somehow managed to mess up my back.
It must have been some core activity or something.
Yeah.
So Eric has been-- you've all been with this a lot,
but Eric has been with us a lot, and we've enjoyed-- nope.
We're just going to watch--
No, no.
So let's look at Eric scaring some people.
[MUSIC PLAYING]
It's a funny--
Boo!
Ah, mother--
Boo!
Jesus Christ.
Boo!
[SCREAMS] Hola, Eric.
Boo!
Hey, Eric.
How you doing, man?
Good.
I'm not even sure which one would you go first--
Boo!
Oh, no.
No, Eric was trying to scare me.
Boo!
Ah, mother of pearl.
Oh, stop it.
Boo!
Really?
Ellen tell you to do this?
All right.
You got some of them.
No, Ed was genuinely scared.
Sofia was genuinely scared.
I was.
You got some of them.
You did.
Yeah.
OK, so we hear someone is getting killed off this season.
That is correct.
Jesse.
No.
Don't tell us.
Maybe, I don't know.
I don't know.
We can't say anything.
I didn't get nervous when I heard somebody was--
You didn't?
No.
If I had heard somebody was going to get deported,
then I would have been.
It would be either Rico or me.
I think Rico would go first.
All right, we're going to take a break.
We'll be back.
You're going to stand here.
Mm-hmm.
All right, you're going to stand here.
Mm-hmm.
I'm going to, I think I'll sit here.
Why don't you sit here too.
OK.
All right, crowd around.
All right.
Are we doing a photoshoot?
Yep, we are.
Did you-- you just figured that out?
All right.
One.
I don't know what I'm doing.
Two.
Three, go.
A prom photo?
Cheese.
Oh, that's good.
I'm doing that too.
Boo!
Woah!
[SCREAMS]
Oh my God.
Get out of there!
Who is it?
Who's in there?
Get out.
Who is it?
It's Lady Gaga.
Who is it?
Who are you?
Get out!
Did she-- did it get you?
It's just a clown.
Yes he did.
Not OK.
This is not OK.
The 10th season premiere of Modern Family
airs tomorrow at 9:00 on ABC.
I want to thank the cast of Modern Family.
Bye bye.
[MUSIC PLAYING]