And you get to perform to your favourite song.
How many people get to do that?
It's true, yeah.
I'm an ARMY too, by the way.
Oh wow, ARMY!
(Ferlyn) ARMY! (Jian Wen) Borahae!
Borahae.
Hi.
Actually...
I think I'm struggling with,
A bit of uncertainty of the future.
I'm not sure where to move on from here.
To give everybody a context, I think,
Last year I auditioned to become a K-Pop idol.
And I wanted to chase this dream of mine.
So I actually auditioned for 13 different companies.
And I really wanted to achieve this dream but,
Unfortunately, I didn't pass any auditions.
But it was an interesting experience for me.
Just that I'm not really sure how to move on from here.
Yeah. It's a bit of an uncertainty about the future.
First of all, thanks for sharing.
I'm actually quite impressed that you went to 13 auditions.
That's pretty impressive man.
Like, how do you feel going to 13 of them?
Did you prepare a lot for it?
I kind of like, sent the same audition clip to 13 different companies.
I'm okay.
The preparation process wasn't so much.
- Oh, so it's a virtual audition kind of thing. - Yeah, it's a virtual audition.
I've even been to a Zoom audition as well.
Share with me what you did.
What did you prepare? What did you do?
Sing? Dance? I don't know.
I was auditioning under the dance category because,
A little bit of background, I did breakdance when I was younger.
When I was preparing, I prepared to dance.
And I also danced to the song-
I don't know whether you know this song by BTS called 'Euphoria'?
(Ferlyn) Oh, 'Euphoria'! (Jian Wen) Yeah.
For some of the other auditions, I also prepared my own choreography.
Like B-Boy choreography.
So do you enjoy the process of doing all these?
I was a bit nervous at first, but then I felt that,
Overall, I enjoyed the whole experience. From the preparation-
Even though it's quite long, I felt that it was all worth it.
Then that's great! I mean if it's worth it then,
I mean, you've definitely learned something out of it right?
And you've probably improved yourself through the whole process also.
Maybe without yourself knowing.
But I'm pretty sure you are better than you were before the whole process of the audition.
I would like to share more about myself also.
Sure.
I used to work in the K-Pop industry.
(Ferlyn) So I... (Jian Wen) Ooh!
I pretty much know the kind of struggle & disappointment you're feeling right now.
But I feel like,
In anything we do right.
As long as we enjoy the process, we know that we did our best,
I don't think the result is everything.
And I'm pretty sure that what you've learned throughout the process last year,
It will be of good use in the near future.
That's what I feel.
I think it's true, yeah.
Do you feel more confident in your own skills, in your dancing?
Yeah, honestly, now that you've said it.
Whatever I did, it helped me to become a better person, in a sense.
I was better than the person before I even did all these things.
That's good.
So if there's more auditions in the future, will you want to go for it?
It's not really of whether I would go, I think I'm too old for it as well.
(Ferlyn) Okay... (Jian Wen) Yeah.
Because I think they would want younger people.
Well...
Don't let those details, or like,
Specifications, stop you from doing what you want to do.
I actually went for an audition before.
Oh!
And I was past the age range that they were looking for.
Oh, wow.
But I got what I wanted. I was the final winner.
(Jian Wen) Oh, wow! (Ferlyn) I was the oldest contestant.
So I don't think you should base on what other people want,
But what you really want.
I guess... Yeah.
Wait so, did you go on to Korea?
Well, I worked there for a while.
I felt exactly how you're feeling right now.
When I had to make a decision whether or not to,
Find a new path or continue what I was doing.
I also felt like there were a lot of uncertainties in my future.
I think it's part & parcel of life.
In every kind of industry.
Be it the entertainment industry or an office job.
As a lawyer or as a doctor.
At some point, I feel like everybody will face that.
And I think that's part & parcel of adulting.
Yeah, I guess... Wow.
Yeah I don't think you should beat yourself down too much.
And you told me that you gained confidence from it.
You know that you are better today than you were before the auditions.
(Jian Wen) Yeah. (Ferlyn) Right?
And you get to perform to your favourite song! How many people get to do that?
True, yeah.
I'm an ARMY too, by the way.
Oh wow, ARMY!
(Ferlyn) ARMY! (Jian Wen) Borahae!
Borahae.
How are you feeling right now?
Honestly, a bit comforted in a sense.
Knowing that someone has been through this.
Especially in Singapore. It's a very different experience also.
It's not common to a normal Singaporean.
Who wants to do well, maybe become a doctor or lawyer.
I think it's a very different experience and knowing that,
Someone else has been through this.
It gives me great joy also, in a sense.
I feel a sense of... Wholesomeness.
That somehow people relate (to me).
I'm glad you gained something out of this conversation.
But I'm curious though, what are you doing now?
(Jian Wen) What am I doing now? (Ferlyn) Still studying?
I chose to pursue content creation on the various social media platforms like Instagram, TikTok.
And I think I enjoy what I do.
I do videos about my own life, like I do vlogging.
I do fashion-related content.
(Ferlyn) Nice! (Jian Wen) I think that's what brings me joy.
That's great.
Any struggles while doing all these?
I think it's more of like,
Like, how do I start? I think in Singapore, it's not very common
To pursue this kind of job.
I think I struggle a bit on how to start and where to start.
Do I just keep making videos then income will come in?
Or like, how do you get noticed by other brands before you get sponsorships?
Actually, now that we're on this topic, I'm curious what you're doing as well.
I'm currently a full-time actress.
Oh, wow!
Yes, I'm focusing on acting.
That is something I never thought I would do.
(Ferlyn) I never thought I would be an actress. (Jian Wen) Wait, really?
Isn't it part of the process of being a Kpop idol?
Like, they go into acting also.
No.
No, I've never imagined myself being an actress.
(Jian Wen) Really? (Ferlyn) Yeah.
It actually took me a while, I struggled a bit to find confidence to do what I'm doing today.
That's why I mentioned just now.
You know, if you feel like this path is for you,
Opportunities will come to you.
And it really depends on whether you want to grab it or not.
And I grabbed it even though I was way past the age range they were looking for.
Now I'm curious how old you are.
You make it sound like you're so old.
Yeah you see, because I took that opportunity, I didn't want it to go to waste.
Because I really wanted to do it, right?
I did it & today I have the opportunity to talk to you & share my experience.
And because of this talk I think it's worth it!
If I can really inspire someone, why not?
So that's what I do now.
Wow, that's pretty cool.
Yeah but then again,
In the future, if I have other opportunities waiting for me, I think I will go for it though?
What are some struggles you're facing in the industry now that you're acting?
Actually, similar to you.
Being an artiste, it's all about content creation, all about how to gain awareness.
To get people to like you, to get clients to use you.
For the start, I actually struggled a bit.
And it's probably what you're going through now.
And I would say that it's inevitable. Everybody has to go through that.
But by going through that you kind of find the colour of your personality.
You kind of find like,
Your niche.
Slowly you will grow. Slowly I think, people will see you.
And when that day comes,
If you want to hide your light, you cannot hide it. Because you already found your new confidence, personality.
Your new persona I should say.
Be a little bit patient with yourself I think. That's very important.
How about the people around you? Your family, your friends.
Do they support what you're doing?
Hmm, okay, yes.
I think honestly, I'm pretty grateful for my friends & family.
Shout out to my parents, they choose to fully support me.
And be there for me whenever I need help.
And to my friends, when I have struggles, I share with them.
When I have joys in life, I share with them as well & they celebrate with me.
They also give me advice, stick by me & never once doubted me.
It's very lucky for you to have these people around you.
Do you have any mentor?
(Ferlyn) To help you & guide you. (Jian Wen) Mentor?
And maybe give you creative ideas.
Not really eh.
My friends will sometimes give me ideas.
Or like, they'll just support me in whatever I do.
So if there's one thing that you wish you could have,
While doing what you're doing right now. What is that one thing you wished you have?
I think like what you mentioned. A mentor, someone to look up to.
In Singapore, it's very different.
I think it would really help, not just myself but even others,
If there's like a way or a guide on how to start out in the entertainment industry.
Is it just a one-route thing? Or do you have to go to acting school or university?
People out there who have done it to speak up & share their experiences with everybody.
Actually, I'm quite curious.
Since you went to Korea, how was the journey like?
I think throughout the whole journey I kind of realise what I really want in life.
I grew up. I really grew up. I became an adult.
There's a lot of ups & downs, right?
There's really good ones where I get to do things that I never imagined myself doing.
Then the bad ones are those that people don't see behind closed doors.
Where loneliness kicks in.
Because you do not have a support system, your friends & family are not there (with you).
And I think that part is a little bit of a struggle.
But if you ask me, if I were to turn back time, would I (still) go to Korea?
I will.
So, is it only the K-Pop industry that you want to be in?
Because since your passion is dancing, performing,
Does it really have to be the K-Pop industry or any industry that fits your passion?
I honestly want to maybe like,
Hmm, I don't know, have my own song?
Or maybe act one day.
Nice.
When I was younger, I always had the dream to act in a drama or a show.
I want to see myself acting or singing one day.
I want to bring hope to people, in the sense to inspire others.
I have to ask one thing, do you have any final tips for me?
Given that I'm a newbie going into this industry. Do you have any tips for me?
Well, since you're an ARMY.
You know this song (lyrics),
"You've shown me I have reasons, I should love myself"?
I feel like,
We have to keep finding many many reasons to love ourselves.
Sometimes we forget.
Sometimes it's because of all the disappointment.
But I don't think we should ever put ourselves in that place.
Persevere.
Because you love yourself, persevere.
I'm still persevering.
Hwaiting!
You're very young & you'll be meeting new friends, maybe you'll start dating again.
When you date, there's one thing that as single parents we have to bear in mind.
It's best not to bring him home yet.