-Good evening, I'm Seth Meyers.
This is "Late Night," we hope you're doing well tonight.
And now we're gonna get to the news.
"The New York Times" has published additional audio
of House Minority Leader Kevin McCarthy
and the aftermath of the Capitol attack.
All right, how do we have this much audio of Kevin McCarthy?
Pretty soon, we're gonna be able to put out an E.P..
[ Laughter ]
President Biden said yesterday that his administration
is making progress on reducing the national debt.
Oh, good, that was definitely the thing I was
most worried about.
[ Laughter ] What about abortion,
the pandemic, climate change?
The Democrats are like the people who offer
to bring the most boring thing to a party.
"Good news, everyone, the napkins are here!"
[ Laughter ] "The soiree can begin!"
President Biden warned yesterday that the leaked opinion
that indicated the Supreme Court is prepared to overturn
Roe v. Wade could threaten other freedoms and said,
"What happens if you have states change the laws
saying that children who are LGBTQ can't be in classrooms
with other children?"
Said Republicans, "Oh, hey, that's good.
That's good." [ Laughter ]
"What else you got?"
Florida Congressman Matt Gaetz tweeted yesterday...
Which is pretty bold coming from a guy
who does all his dating on Venmo.
[ Laughter ]
Several journalists across multiple news outlets
have reportedly tested positive for the coronavirus
after attending last weekend's
White House Correspondents' Dinner.
So all those articles about how we're back to normal
are gonna be a week late.
[ Laughter ]
Donald Trump Jr. reportedly met on Tuesday
with the House Committee investigating
the Capitol attack remotely for more than three hours.
Three hours doesn't seem very long,
but because it's Don Jr., it still came out
to like eight hours' worth of testimony.
-The media runs right away.
It's Russian disinformation.
There's literally zero evidence
that it's Russian dis--
[ Laughter ]
-President Biden mistakenly said at a White House event this week
that there's never been a senator from Delaware.
While the GOP is trying to convince us there's
never been a congressman from North Carolina.
[ Laughter ]
Sunday is Mother's Day, which means today is
"I got plenty of time to get a card."
Tomorrow is "I should get a card."
Saturday is "What about an e-card?"
And Sunday is "I'm screwed."
[ Laughter ]
Residents of Nantucket voted yesterday to allow
everyone to go topless on its beaches,
bringing them one step closer to finally living up
to their limericks.
[ Laughter ]
[ Applause ]
An -- Yes, sometimes it takes a minute for the limerick jokes
to land.
[ Laughter ]
We'll be patient.
An otter was recently spotted swimming in the Detroit River
for the first time in over 100 years.
But I'm willing to bet that it's a different otter.
[ Laughter ]
And finally, the FDA is looking at a new proposed rule
to ban menthol cigarettes.
Here to talk about it is one of our writers, Amber Ruffin,
in a segment called "Is This Racist?"
[ Cheers and applause ]
-The FDA is going to ban menthol cigarettes,
and that's ra-- well...
I mean, it is...
[ Laughter ]
Okay. No, wait.
[ Stammers ] I mean, it feels ra--
[ Laughter ]
But is it, like, all-the-way racist?
I -- Okay, okay, okay.
You gotta look at the -- uh...
[ Laughter ]
[ Sighs ] Yeah, 'cause if I say that,
then that means the other thing, so,
dicey, dicey, dicey.
Uh...Okay. Wait.
I got it.
It is racist, because the other cigarettes
are, well -- that's different.
[ Laughter ]
Okay. Wait.
Okay.
Yeah, okay, wait, no.
Not racist, final answer.
[ Laughter ]
[ Cheers and applause ]
-Amber Ruffin, everybody!
-Wait! No, I mean, maybe it is a little --
-We got a great show for you tonight.