Frustration is something that really only ought to show up in your life every
once in a while. But if you've got frustration every day, you need this
training. Watch I'll show you what to do next.
Frustration, why are you facing so much frustration? What is going on? Ah, you know
what? I think you are misinterpreting what frustration really is. Because
frustration is an emotion based upon a response of something that happened. And
if you keep using the language of frustration like, "Oh, I'm so frustrated. Oh
I'm so frustrated." What? How come frustration has like seeped
into your life and literally become part of your language? Oh, we've got to do some
work on you. We're going tO help you out here and understanding what's going on
with this whole frustration thing. I don't use the word. I don't understand
why other people use this word all the time. And let me show you what I do to be
able to help nip this emotion from infesting my life. Frustration happens
because something behind you. Something something in your plans, something in
your schedule didn't work. This is you out here on this line of time. And this
is what's happened behind you. This is like in the last month and last week in
the last couple hours. And these red marks right here mark
different things. This this right here did it happen.
This right here was a glitch. This right here was a small thing didn't happen.
Another glitch. This right here, total come apart. Something didn't actually
come together completely at all. So, when a person is moving through life and you
go through your schedule and you go through your plans during the day,
somewhere along the way people fail you. Or your ideas fail. Looking back over
what has happened, each one of these moments that didn't turn out is an
incomplete experience. But what you're doing is you are standing here looking
forward in your life and you literally are saying, "I'm so frustrated." And what
you're actually to explain to the people around you and
as you're moving forward. And when you say the word frustration you're actually
saying, "Things that I had planned didn't turn out. My ideas aren't working. My
schedule is falling apart." That's what frustration really is to you.
Are these different things that just didn't come together. But here's how
you're blind siding you. This is where you're messing up your ability to solve
these problems is you're using the language of frustration. If you could,
instead of using this word, actually say, "My plan and my schedule didn't work
today. My child, without me knowing it,
interrupted my day. The car broke down." But as long as you keep saying the
emotional word, you actually are telling your brain, "I'm emotional." So, let's
replace this word of frustration with the word emotional. And
imagine if we went around and nobody could use the word frustration anymore.
And they only could say emotional. So, you'd hear people doing this, "Oh, my gosh.
I'm so emotional. You know what? I'm just emotional again. You know kids, you caused
me to be emotional." So instead of saying, "Kids you caused me to be frustrated. Oh,
my gosh. I'm so frustrated today. I'm so frustrated about my schedule." Instead of
saying the word frustration, you might as well just say emotional. Because that's
what you're actually demonstrating is you're just having an emotion. But here's
where you're messing yourself up is you're saying the word frustration that
now is being labeled as kids, calendar, spouse, weather, income, finances, dinner,
dishes. Instead of saying "The dishes aren't done like I asked them to be done.
My spouse forgot to pay the house payment." You see as long as you keep
using the word frustration, you are camouflaging what the real challenge was.
And because your brain is listening to how you talk and
you're labeling everything as frustration it doesn't have any details
to it. And so all these things that fell apart in the last couple days that
caused you to be frustrated, you're going to go through it again.
Because you don't even know what to solve. So, when I hear people say, "Oh, my
gosh. I'm so frustrated with this." And I ask them, I go,
"What are you frustrated about?" I'm not kidding. This is the most common answer I
hear. They will say, "I don't know. I'm just frustrated." And I'll ask my client again.
I'll say, "You keep using the word frustrated. What is it that you're
frustrated about?" "You know, it's just things." And they can't even explain it.
They don't even know what these experiences were. They don't know what
the activities were that frustrated them. Because they just keep labeling all
these incidences with the word frustration. And it's meshing all the
problems together. And guess what? A person who keeps using this word to
describe these situations actually is completely cluttering up their mind. Boy,
as your mentor, if I could give you some advice, don't use this word. It's causing
you confusion, it's causing you to be lost, it's causing you not to know what
to fix. And I'm not kidding. My clients, I'll ask "What are you frustrated about?"
They can't even tell me. And as soon as they start to remember like what it is,
they'll go, "Oh, yeah. It's my kids." I go, "What did your kids do?" "I don't know, but
they just drive me crazy." Tough to solve a problem when you can't
even see what it is. Tough to solve a problem when you can't even see what it
is. Here's the better language. "I am frustrated because my schedule fell
apart today because of my flat tire." Use the emotional word and the description.
But as soon as you start to drop the description and only use the emotional
word, you become and over-clouded mind of emotion
and you're not going to be able to solve your problems. Be very clear that
whenever you go to explain something that is emotional they use the emotional
word and a description of what happened. It's like the person who says, "Oh, I'm so
angry." Okay, what are you angry about? "I'm just so angry." What are you angry about?
They've used "I'm so angry" so many times they actually forgot the details. They
actually don't know who they're angry about. And I rest my case. I rest my case.
That the human race is becoming way overly done in emotions. We are such an
emotionally charged people right now and we are making a bigger mess of it. You
will do better when you can actually eliminate frustration from your language
and describe the activity that needs attention. It needs to be worked on and
needs to be looked at. And needs to be adjusted. Now, here's how you can
literally begin to eliminate step by step, eliminate frustrating moments in
your life. First, what you want to do is you want to look back over the last day.
Look back over the last day. This could be the hours of the day. Look back over
the last day and notice what did not work. Notice, do you have a time
management problem? Do you have a coordination problem? Do you have a
communication problem? Don't blame other people. No blame. You need to take a look
at do you have a communication problem, a coordination problem, a time management
problem. You're the problem. Not everybody else. Because if you blame somebody else,
they can't fix it. Because then you have to control them to change their life, to
be different. So your life is going to get better, better? No! No, you own the problem.
You got to get better as communication, get better with coordination,
better with time management. Somewhere, you caused this to happen. I know, you
could say all kinds of things back to me on this one. But I'm going to poke at you,
point at you. These things you're frustrated about is because you lack
skill. Somewhere along the way, I'm not kidding. As adults, somewhere
along the way, we think we arrived to be the all-knowing adult. Are you kidding? As
an adult, we need more schooling than ever. We're raising children, we're
starting businesses, we're trying to run a household. Whoever said that adults
should stop going to school in high school or college? How come there's not
adult schools going on? We should still be in school on communication skills,
time management skills, coordination skills delegation skills. And because you
are done learning, you're going to have problems. I'm not kidding. I think every
single adult needs to continue to take time management courses. Needs to take
coordination and team-building courses. And be able to literally take emotional
management courses. Why are adults not taking emotional management classes?
What's with that? Like all of a sudden they are perfect with emotions? No, no. Adults are
messing up the kids because adults can't manage their emotions so the kids can't
manage of their emotions. Okay, alright. I'll step on my self box. First step, review
the last day. Find out what, where you lack skill and then go get a book, watch
a video, get training, get a mentor, get a coach, go to a class. And get better at
time management, coordination, team building and all these different types
of things that you really are not good at. Frustration is happening because of
your lack of skill. But you're not going to see it, if you keep labeling
everything as frustration. Or being frustrating. See the problems for what
they are. Call them for what they are. And group them. You're going to notice that a
lot of your glitches actually go into categories.
You'll see it. You'll see it. But review the last day. And if you really want to
start to learn about yourself, review the last week and notice where the glitches
are. Because the glitches that happened today, (Guess what?) Are going to happen tomorrow.
No! And then they're going to happen next week. Because as long as you keep
labeling them as frustrating and you don't label them for what they are,
you can't fix them. So, call it for what it is and find some training to help you.
Help you get through that. So, to get better and not be so frustrated, you get
to learn how to give instructions better. Instructions to your kids, instructions
to your spouse. When you are not good at instructions, you cause these glitches. So,
practice giving instructions better. Next, follow up with people. Follow up with
them. Have them, you know... You text them, you call them, anytime you get a
prompting that you feel like something's not being taken care of, that is a real
indicator you need to call and follow up. As soon as you sense that somebody
didn't do what you ask them to do, it's a real thing. Trust your intuition. Trust
your intuition. A third one to help you to get away from this frustration that's
consumed your life and you're drowning in is ask people to report to you. When
you're kids... If you're worried about your kids or and what your kids are doing,
have them text you. "Hey, when you get to school text me. When you leave school
today, text me. When you get to your friend's house, text me." This isn't
control. It's called communication. Raise your kids with this higher level of
communication. That they get to report to mom and dad. You don't have to go chase
them and it's so frustrating because your kids don't communicate with you. Set
the ground rules. Set the ground rules that your kids report to you if that's
what's needed. Or if you've got people on your team that you need to know what's
going on, set the ground rules. But to help you eliminate this,
every step of the way. Get better at instructions, follow up on the people and
cause them to report. If you're doing all the follow up, NO. You set up systems
that they get to report to you. Because if you're caught up in all the follow up,
you're going to get frustrated with that, People can report as much as you follow
up on them and kids get to learn that reporting is a process of life. So,
frustration, yes, it's an emotion. But it's an emotion that it's time for you to
manage and to eradicate. Frustration is the emotional reaction to something not
working out. And today's your day to manage that emotion and start noticing
what it is that needs to be fixed. Adjust or changed by you getting some training
in communication, coordination and I'm going to throw this one in. --Emotional
management skills. That's a game changer. let's get frustration out of your life.
Okay, cut frustration out of your life. Stop saying the word. Now, I can help you
from this point on. What you want to do is you want to click the link below, it's
about my monthly mentoring program. You don't even have to travel. No travel at
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know the more you understand the better you're going to perform.