Aye yai yai yai YAI
Yaai.
Oh no.
Oh,
"Welcome to alpha three"?
Is that talking about the game or is that talking about the town?
Are there some weird segmented
series of towns and this is the third -
oh shit.
Oh hi.
Hello!
Oh, you look tired.
*mumbles* Also stupid.
* Dancing very weirdly*
Whoah.
Whooahahoh!
WHOAH!!
HELLO NEIGHBOR!
Hi...
Oh shit, well -
that got more insane.
Why did I buy this house?
Oh man.
Man, the land value in this neighborhood must be shit
if that's what we're looking at.
Oh my GOD.
Well hello everybody!
My name is Markiplier and welcome back to Hello Neighbor.
It's been a while,
uhh,
since I played.
And uh, there's been a lot of changes I imagine,
So I'm just gonna go right over and say hiiii!
*thunder crashes* I-
Helloo?
I'm new to the neighborhood!
Oh god this is drastically different.
Oh god everything's different! Hello!! I'm
just gonna barge into your home!! Hope you don't mind -
Ohhhh fuck me.
*softly* Hello? Hi!
I remember there being -
*he heard something behind him*
I remember there being mannequins, but I
don't remember there being anything - ooh -
I... Ahhh... oh. Okay, this is bizarre!
Oh. Yeah, let's keep the lights off, I like
to make it creepier in my -
*hears car noise outside*
- breaking and entering.
*neighbor gasps behind Mark*
Fucking hello! HI!
WHOA! HI!
Fucking fuck!
What the fuck??
Well I guess he was gentle about it,
I heard a gasp, and then he moved on!
Good for him, I guess. He was just - he was just
mildly concerned that somebody was in his house!
Okay, well, that's a thing.
I guess he just picked me up with his big, strong arms and
moved me back outside to my place.
well okay; oh this has not been taken care
of. Oh man, the art style has drastically
improved I must -
I must admit. I'm just going to steal his
milk and his broom, and his - pot and everything
move along. Oh geez, why is this here? I can't even move
that. Why can't I move that anymore? Like why I can't I
move anything anymore?
Why is everything so locked down in here?
Okay well somewhere - fucking I'm not in
your house; you're in my house. I'm just
unpacking, was looking for help
yeah well, yeah okay, forgive and forget!
Okay, well, at least I have a house now
Hello 911? I'm breaking into my
neighbor's house - oh. It's very dark. Oh, jeez.
Well, I goofed, because I have no
idea where my thing is now.
*creepy music playing*
I don't know what that is, but I think
it's really stupid.
Oh! I have to press and hold to pick up.
Oh, hey neighbor.
You want some glue? Is that sticky? Ah, it's sticky.
Hey neighbor!
Hi-yah!
What was that? I'm going in.
Aye yai yai yai yai yia ya.
yai yai YAAAIIIII
Okay, so he's not up here. I don't - oh, fuck no!
No! Why is it all locked down now? How am I
gonna be able to get - how am I gonna be
able to get anywhere?
Okay, so this is saying that there's a key in an
apple, maybe?
*footsteps on floorboards*
Ooo, fuck.
Hi. I don't like this place at all.
Nothing here is cool.
Absolutely everything in this house is terrifying,
and I don't know why I should be here but
I'm looking for a key apple; an apple key.
Oh fuck, I didn't - I didn't do that!
AH FUCKING FUCKING FUCK
FUCKING STOP!
Good God
that's so scary now.
Is it never gonna be daytime?
Is there a key in the apple?
Is the apple a key? I'm gonna bring this apple as
a goodwill offering.
*somewhat speaking German* Do you like mein Apfel?
Oooohhhh scheisse.
No thank you, no thank you, there's no reason
to be upset.
There is no reason to be upset!
All right then, okay, alright.
Well, just gonna go into your house again.
You are a trusting individual and I like that.
I like that a lot.
I've gotta - oh.
I didn't do that.
*Mark speaking German* Magst du Apfel? ["Do you like apple?"]
Okay, so I think this is a lie, unless
there's another Apfel somewhere here.
Oh no, what is this?
Hello?
Whoop, shit didn't mean to throw that.
Whoah.
Okay, alright then, don't mind uh - just
gonna go into my neighbor's house and
watch TV.
Is that a crime? Probably.
*neighbor gasps* Fuck! Why are -
AH FUCKING god damn it, fuck!
*SIGH* Fuck, well
I still got your remote, bitch.
Well, what are you gonna do when your TV's turning on and off randomly and you
have no idea how to control it.
You'll never have any control in your
life anymore!
*neighbor gasps, Mark gasps*
Oh...
Oh, he's stuck in his own bear trap
like an idiot.
Okay, well I'm not doing anything what are you doing
Whoa, wait whoa whOA WHOA WHOA WHOA WHOA
TURN OFF
Fuck off!
Yeah, that's right!
Yeah, it's right!
Yeah, what are you doin'? Huh?
Nothin'? Yeah, me neither! Good!
Let me just get a good look at that ASS!
Awww, let me get a good look at that struttin' ASS!
Oh, he knows.
Oh he knows I'm watchin'.
*GUTTURAL SCREAM*
Okay bye!
So he's going back over there, let me go to his kitchen maybe there's a
Uhh the- I mean the- *creepy music starts playing*
Hey!
Come on, now, come on!
Come on, no-
Whoa.
Hey. Hey... Hey! Hey!
*glass shattering* Hey...
Oh shit, he don't like that!
Well, what you- what you gonna do, neighbor, hah? Huh?
Huh! You betcha- You can't cross that line, huh?
Oooooh, if you cross that line, I'm gonna-
I'm gonna give it to ya, bitch, I'm gonna give a-
throw a couple haymakers your way!
Come on! Come at me! Fuck off! Get some!
Yeah!
Get some!
Okay, so are you gonna go? You gonna go?
You gonna go, bruh? Huh? Yeah? Well, you cre-
You take one more step I'm 'onna call the police!
I'm gonna call the police!
Yeah that's right walk away mister
*neighbor gasps* Whoa wait whoa whoa whoa
wait whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa
WHOA waow whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa
I don't know what the fuck happened there, but whoa
Is there a way to get into my own bedroom?
Maybe I could just take a nap
and be done with all this.
Wake up in the morning when I can actually see something.
I'm just gonna go to bed!
Well I can't do that anymore!
That doesn't exist as an option.
WEEEEEELP! I need to get insiiiiide theeeeere!
I need to find a way inside.
I need to find a key or something.
I need to find a flashlight, that's what I need to find.
Oh, I just noticed; why is his car crashed
into his yard?
*creepy music*
Did y- Oh, fucking why?!
Fine, you know what, kill me!
I don't even c- whoa, hey. That was
uncomfortably close.
Okay, so I bet in his kitchen somewhere...
It's got to be a secret apple.
Ooh, that's a flashlight!
Oh, perfect!
Oh perfect! Oh, perfect, yes!
Okay, so I've got a flashlight,
which hopefully means that I'm gonna be able to find what I need to find-
Oop, shit.
So this is better!
Albeit, a little scarier.
So I just gotta make sure that I'm not where he is.
Because if I do that, then I'm gonna die.
But I can take you now.
Kay.
Least that unlocks the back door, which is good
Okay, so making progress-
Oh my God, he's got a glue collection.
Least I hope that's glue. *heebie jeebies*
Oh!
Well, I did somethin'!
I dunno what I did, but I don't know if I shoulda doned it!
Kay, where does this wire go?
Wire, wire, where do you lead?
Oh my god, you go higher
Ooooh, *gasp*
Did that open the gaaate?
Oh that might have opened the gate!
Oh that might- *neighbor gasps*
Wha- whooa okay gonna- ah, ring around the rosie!!
WhooaaaaiiiyaaaiyaiyaiyaiyaiYAI!!!
*SCREAMS*
How close is he?! Jesus, how fast?!
Fucking fuck, that's fast!
You're not allowed to be that fast! Also what is- What is that?
Oh, it's a cup of coffee, okay.
All right, then, carry on!
Whatever the hell you decide to do,
you carry on and do it,
'cause I'm about through your house.
*neighbor gasps*
Fucking- what did I do?!
Oh, the flashlight, duh, he can see that, okay
All right, goodbye! Good night, good night, neighbor.
Good night.
Good night, neighbor.
I'm gonna make it in there!
I'm gonna get up there. I'm gonna get up. I'm gonna get up
and do the thing with the thing and the people in the thing.
Can you get out of your front lawn?
I'd appreciate that, thank you.
Sneaky sneaky.
Sneaky, whoosh! Okay.
Whoosh! Like a boy Ada!
And...
Fuck! Did he turn off...
He might've turned off the thing.
*knocking sound* Fuck!
Oh shit. Who's knocking on the
other side of that goddamn door?
Okay so this is on...
What does that mean?
I don't know what tha- *neighbor gasps*
Fuck, where is he? Ah, shit.
Scheisse! Scheisse scheisse scheisse!
What about that door? What about that one?
AH, AH, AH!!
IT DOESN'T WOOOOORK, oh ye-
Wait, fuck, does it? Oh, it does. Hang on...
*horror ambiance*
Hokay! Well that's... terrifying!
Why am I in here...?
What's in here?
Oh!
A fucking back door, hell yes!
*neighbor gasps*
AAAHHH FUCK
God dammit, you sack of tits!
Okay, well, I found a back door in,
so that's good, and it seems like it-
Oooh.
Don't know what that did, but it seems like it procedurally unlocks
*neighbor gasps* things throughout the house.
Where is he? I hear him!
Oh, see him- wh-eyyyyyyyy! AAAAA
Oh fuck, never mind, hi.
So, this seems like it procedurally unlocks things
throughout the house so maybe...
*neighbor gasps* Whoa, fucking hell.
Whoa-kay!
Jesus, he just spawns in a random location; how am I supposed to know?
*neighbor gasps*
No, he spawns in the front door apparently.
So there's gotta be another way in that I can go,
but I'm gonna go around the side and turn this off...
Let's take my my chair with me.
My stealth chair.
Kay. Be sneaky peeky like it.
Oh shit. This is NOT sneaky peeky.
It's the opposite of sneaky peeky.
So it's obviously not this...
but there's a switch on the other side.
I just gotta get to it.
*neighbor gasps*
OH hello, hi!
Where'd you come from-*gibberish*
There's gotta be a way, there's uh-
It's obviously a clue:
apple and key. So there's gotta be a
golden apple 'n' thats a key I get it
I'm smart.
Ooh, that's not good
I'll lose him!
Ooh, not gonna lose him apparently.
Ooh, lemme hide in here, he'll never find me.
Heh! Heh heh!
He'll never beat me, I got a chair-
Ooooh boy.
Well!
OOOOOOOKAAAAY
Well I got- oh sh-
What the fuuuuu-
Hi!
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
All right! I don't know what the hell happened there.
Mother get up, come on, get down with the sickness.
Your father get up, come on, get down with the sickness!
Or in these rooms- Oh!
Have not been in here yet!
Let me just take this chair again
Put that somewhere else- right there.
Ooh, sneaky peeky.
Oooh, can't see a thing.
Okay- Oooh, is this where he takes his
rub-a-dub-dubs?
Man, what kind of funky bed is this?
What kind of-
Why? Why would it be so lifted?
Is there a key? More flashlight.
*gasp!*
Apple! Apple?
Apple?
Apple! I found an apple!
It said apple was the key!
Does this mean I found the key?
*neighbor gasps* OH fucking fuck
Waaaaaaoh I'm fucked!
Okay. Well I've still got the apple though
So that's good.
So maybe I can take this apple and I'll
be able to do something with it to the
door and get the key.
Maybe whatever was knock knock
knockin on heaven's door up there
Can I-
Oh shit. *neighbor gasps*
Fuckin'- I can't move, so you're gonna
have to come to me
Okay! All right then, fuck!
Okay, so there's gotta be a way...
Please don't be around this corner.
Please don't be around THIS corner.
Please don't be- *scare chord*
OHAAAAAAAAI-Hi!
Goddammit, how am I supposed to
be able to get in there?!
I dunno where he is!
I gotta be like patient about it or
somethin'!
So this is... meaningless.
Apple keys...
*knocking*
Hello! Hell-oh!
Wait, is it-That's a different apple.
Is it the one I brought before?
*groans* Okay, so there's... there's some sort of
secret here but I am not getting it.
Another flashlight, glue, a bong, eyeballs...
Whoa. Hello, that's... interesting!
Why? Why? What did he do?
Where did he do it?
Oh, hey...
Alrighty then.
I like how it's the exact sounds from
Slenderman, so long ago.
At least I got- At least I can explore my house now.
That's kinda nice!
Ooh, I've got an upstairs? Who knew!
Can I open it?
I cannot! For some reason I can't open
my own upstairs, that's good.
Hello!
What? I can't pick up my own
goddamn flashlight again? What?!
I just threw it!
Oh god damn it.
Well, I gotta go get another one.
And he's gonna be in the fucking way.
Heh, stealthy! *gibberish*
Da na na na na na na! (No Mark)
I'm stealthy!
Da na na na na na na! ( NOOOO)
I'm sneaking!
Da na na na na na na! (You killed us all)
No one will find me! (Well I did)
Uh? Ah? (Mark are you 5 years old)
EYYYYYY
HEEYYYY
I don't know if I was supposed to do that, but
it worked!
Yay?
So...
*thunder crashes outside*
Okay, that did- Oh, what's that?
No? Okay, nothing.
I saw an apple!
I thought maybe, but apparently not.
Boop!
Ooh, shit!
Well, you can't get me here, maybe!
I have no idea, maybe!
Well that dosen't help anybody!
Okay, well, we're in trouble.
Oh, fuck me.
There's a golden lock?! Oh, shit.
Oh wait, more wire!
Oh! Wait, that wire that I was, that I was doing the
thing for that goes all the way over here!
This goes nowhere except down.
Well, he's- He's angry about- Oh, that fell down.
Okay, there's nothing there.
Why are there windows on the ceiling?!
Ah, but either way the- the wire does run all the way
over there
Oh, hello!
Okay, house... to house, upside-down
Eight left, 24 down, a lambda
Uh, orange and blue, so Portal! (yeah, right)
Uh, Eight left, 24 down, Half-Life and then Portal, *gibberish*
That's what I'm gathering from that.
Hup! Fuck. Well, that was stupid.
Shit. I have done goofed myself.
Oh boy oh boy oh boy HI!
Oh, fucking fuck!
All right then, let's try that again.
Shoobadee-boo-boooooo bubippity
*neighbor gasps*
AH FUCKING why there? Why there?
Shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit sh sh sh sh
HEY whoa, hey, friend!
Let me try this again...
*Whiny jump*
FUCKING god dammit, I'm such an a-
Ooooooooh...
Heeeeeeeey...
Heellooooo...
Oh, he's gone.
Ahhh, hooooo
So...
OOOHHHHHHH!!!
OOOHH!!
I CAN'T GET THAT!
aaaaoOOOH, COME ON!!
How in the fuck do I get that?
*whiny groan*
*whiny scream*
Okay, well that's a big ol' bag a' dicks.
What do I do about that?
Okay, well, shit.
I found where the key is, and that guy...
knocked down his face.
None of these work. I've accidentally-
Oh, maybe something behind the paintings.
Maybe like in the house
like the paintings are important like
anything that could possibly be behind
the paintings, maybe.
I'm really reaching here,
but you know... Now that I know
that there could be things behind the paintings...
So this is a gold lock
NNNNNNNNNNNanything behind here? No?
Alrighty then.
Laaaamp-uh?
Noooo, all right, windooows?
This does not work!
Eight left, 24 down, lambda, horseshoe.
I don't know what this means.
This is a clue to something, I just
don't know what it is.
So there's a clue here, and there's
something that I could do.
Uuuugh, but what is it?
What is it?
I've explored a bit and I've made some
progress, but I don't feel like it's
nearly enough for what I've done.
So there's a hole in the wall, and I need
a grabber to be able to get through that. I've got-
*creepy music* eyes staring at me...
Oh shit- Hello!
You're never gonna get me!
Shut up and be stupid, and then I've got
this switch but I turn the power off so
I can't open this gate anymore, but I could
open the gate if I turn the power back
on, then i'd be able to have some lights
in the house.
You'll never get me!
Ha! Haha! Look at you!
Aw, you're so stuck!
Oh shit, is he- is he literally bashing that open?
Is he gonna get through that eventually?
I don't think he is, so either way,
that's all the time I got for this episode here,
I am gonna try this more in the future.
I am gonna penetrate the defenses of this game,
and I kinda want to find it out for myself,
but if I get super stuck
I will look it up, so thank you everybody
so much for watching, and as always,
I will see you... in the next video!
Buh-bye!
(Out-tro plays in full)