We’ve all been there.
You have a great date. You have a great connection.
You have great chemistry. You have great sex.
And then, for some unknown reason, the guy doesn’t call you back.
The questions abound. What happened? What did you
do wrong? What should you do now to get him to take action?
Take a deep breath. In this Love U Podcast, I’m going to tell you
exactly how to handle things the next time a guy disappears on you. Stick around.
I’m Evan Marc Katz, dating coach for smart, strong, successful women and your personal
trainer for love. Welcome to the Love U Podcast. Keep listening to learn what to
do when he doesn’t call you back. When we’re done, I’ll let you know how you can apply to
Love U to create a passionate relationship that makes you feel safe, heard, and understood.
So in Love U, which is my signature course, it helps women understand men and find love.
I teach an important core metaphor in Love U. If you're a regular listener,
you've heard me say this before. Women are the CEOs and men are the interns. Now, that's not
something that should be taken too literally, I could easily spin the entire thing around.
If I was giving dating advice to men, I'd tell them that they were the CEOs.
It's the mindset. That's the important thing. But what that means
for you, as the CEO of your own love life is that men are abundant. Abundant. There are billions of
men out there. So to anchor on any one guy as if he's the last man on Earth is usually a bad idea.
And since guys are so abundant and since you only need one who could be your rock for the
rest of your life, you should never really operate from a place of scarcity. Scarcity - when you're
operating from a place of scarcity, you are essentially giving your CEO power to an intern.
You're giving all your juice of being the person who gets to do the hiring and you switch your
positions. So it's like you're begging for a job. So the attitude means a lot. I know you
came here to learn what to do when a guy doesn't call you back. This is where we get started.
So what does it look like when a guy doesn't call you back?
Well, it could just be you staring at your phone, waiting for him to text.
It could be stalking his social media, looking for some sort of sign of what he's up to.
It could be kind of reaching out to him in some sort of benign way, trying to see if
he's OK since you haven't heard from him. Maybe you're even reaching out to him very
directly point blank, trying to remind him that you're around and you miss him and you
want to see him, and that you're still alive and want to know what's going on?
So listen, these are normal behaviors. I completely understand your impulse. It's normal,
but it's not CEO behavior, and that's for sure. And you know it and I know
it. We know the difference between when we're acting from a place of confidence
and abundance and fear and insecurity. So picture a CEO and it doesn't matter
which picture you have, it could be Oprah and it could be Elon Musk.
But you don't picture that CEO running into the parking lot, trying to find out where the intern
is and why he didn't show up for his interview. Why?
Because that CEO knows there are a lot of people who want to work for Oprah or Tesla.
You don't have to run into the parking lot waving your fist at, "Where did that intern go? And why
didn't they show up?" So when you feel that way in this moment, because you like this guy,
right? It's not about like, I'm giving you theory, and in practice,
there's this one guy that you like and you're really anchored on him and you don't want to
have to start over and you don't want to see other guys and I get it. But here's the not so secret
secret of why men disappear. It doesn't matter. So when we attempt to answer these questions that
I posed at the top of the podcast, here are the real answers to the questions.
The thing that you really want to know, here's the answer.
What happened? I don't know.
What did you do wrong? Maybe something, but probably nothing.
What should you do now to get him to take action? Nothing.
It may be dissatisfying, but it's actually the truth.
So on one lens that's disempowering. The whole point of this podcast is to tell me
there's nothing I could do. But no this is actually the opposite. This is freeing.
Instead of racking your brain, beating yourself up over the fact that the guy is not emotionally
available or that he's not that attracted to you, by the way, not emotionally available and not that
attracted to you or generally decent science that is not going to be a good boyfriend.
And the whole point of this is that when a guy disappears, guy doesn't call you back,
you can just shrug and move on and find another guy who does act like he's into you,
does follow through, does call you back in Love U. And again, it's a massive course.
But in week six, we start to talk about dating and we do a whole huge unit of like six straight
weeks of material on dating itself, starting with online dating and ending with becoming exclusive.
So this idea that we talk about in today's content is from the dating module.
Sorry, the Staying Cool module on dating and part of staying cool is not letting any one
guy have too much power over your mood or you when he's not even your boyfriend. To
get disproportionately excited about this crush, you have the guy who's texting you,
the guy you went out with, the guy you hooked up with is giving him way too much power.
So I understand it is fun to have a crush. It's exciting to have a connection.
It's great to have a first date that gives you hope.
But if we keep in mind our Love U aphorism that no man is real until he's your boyfriend,
you'll have a much easier time letting go the next time some guy you like doesn't call you back.
So the best revenge is not to say something nasty about how he should have called you back.
The best revenge you can get is to get online. Find a guy who values you,
find a guy who wants to be with you and does not leave you hanging,
wondering when he's going to call again? Your job is to get back out there and do it.
My name is Evan Marc Katz. Thank you for tuning in to the Love U Podcast. For more episodes like
this on YouTube, click the subscribe button and ring the bell and choose all to ensure you get
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please share an honest review on Apple. More reviews = more awareness of the Love
U podcast = more love in the world. And if you want to have an easy relationship
that makes you feel safe, heard and understood, look for the link below or go
to www.evanmarckatz.com to watch my free video about how to gain confidence, attract
quality men and fix your broken man-picker. When you’re done, you can apply to Love U Live to join
hundreds of other smart, strong, successful women from around the world in a coaching
community where women like you actually get the unconditional love you deserve. See you there.