There's a peculiar sort of formula to many Oscar-winning movies.
As a result, a certain template has emerged over the years for movies that fall in a category
called "Oscar bait."
These movies tend to share some common traits.
They're often biopics of famous figures, or they can be ponderous modern-day dramas that
require the lead actors to transform themselves dramatically.
But often enough, these efforts to win awards fail, with actors putting their heart on their
sleeve and their health on the line for movies that ultimately end up falling short of expectations.
So watch on for a history of Oscar bait performances that turned out to be just terrible.
You can see what drew John Travolta to Gotti.
On paper, at least, a lot about it sounds pretty appealing.
It's a biopic of New York City crime boss John Gotti, chronicling his rise, reign, and
ultimate fall.
On paper, it seems to be exactly the sort of role that draws awards like magnets.
In execution, however, it's just embarrassing.
Not only is the movie around Travolta made with stunning incompetence, but his performance
is more high camp than high art.
He commits to the role theatrically, chewing over his syllables and leaning his whole body
into every scowl and moment of swagger.
It's awkward, it doesn't work, and worst of all, it's only sporadically entertaining.
"if I ever hear you talk to them for that matter or a cop or any cop I'll kill ya."
Tedious and dull, Hyde Park on Hudson takes what could be a rather interesting story and
lets it wither on the vine.
Set during a 1930s Hudson Valley summit between President Franklin Roosevelt and the king
and queen of England, the movie depicts Roosevelt's alleged love affair with a distant cousin.
It's a comedy of manners and scandal that hits with weightless impact, never really
justifying its own existence.
Bill Murray stars as FDR, turning on the charm in a script that serves him rather poorly.
While Murray would seem perfectly suited to a comic take on the four-term president's
life, the script itself forgets to give him much of anything funny or dramatically intriguing
to do.
"Perhaps you would show me some of your stamps?
You cannot be interested.
Oh by I am.
I doth protest "
Starring Harrison Ford as a high-powered corporate lawyer in New York City after a gunshot wound
radically alters his personality, Regarding Henry is a curious misfire from a bunch of
professionals you'd think would know better.
Directed by the ridiculously accomplished Mike Nichols and written by a young J.J. Abrams,
it comes off like one long, slow mistake.
While Ford commits to Henry's journey from attorney to imbecile, the craftsmanship of
the movie never manages to overcome the original sin of its concept.
It's weird and awkward, with humans not quite acting like humans and the drama feeling unearned.
It's also remarkable for being one of the few Oscar bait movies that substitutes "character
growth" with "getting shot in the face."
"Dad?
Are you serious?
I know.
Very."
A swing and a miss from Will Smith that vaguely feels like it was made by aliens who visited
our galaxy as part of an effort to win Oscars, Seven Pounds follows Smith as a man seeking
redemption for the pain he caused through a fatal texting-while-driving incident.
As penance, he seeks out seven worthy people in need of organ donations to receive his
healthy body parts after he kills himself.
As a result, the movie barely has a story everything is in service to a character study
of Smith's protagonist as he works his way up to a sad, sentimental sacrifice.
"(sad music)"
But whatever affecting qualities the journey may have are completely deflated by the method
of his character's suicide stung to death by a box jellyfish while sitting in an ice
bath.
Seeing movie star Will Smith flop around in a motel bathtub as a jellyfish exacts poetic
vengeance on his body isn't the kind of thing you want to honor with awards.
Instead, you mostly want to make sure no one in the theater hears you snickering.
Naomi Watts is talented, charismatic, and fearless in her choice of roles, but that
willingness to be bold occasionally lands her in some pretty crappy movies.
One of them, Diana, is a failure on just about every level.
It's unable to present an accurate picture of the Princess of Wales or effectively convey
what made her story worth telling in the first place.
As a result, Diana went home empty-handed during awards season, save for a Razzie nomination
for Watts.
The actress is typically always the best part of her lousier movies, but she can't even
come close to saving this one.
"So now you've had the best of what's to offer and you're just going to clear off!"