- Internet nightmares, come on down.
- Let's talk about that.
(bright upbeat music)
(flames crackling) (air whooshes)
"Good Mythical Morning."
- eBay, it's like that odd kid in elementary school,
Travis, that carried around a backpack full of nightmares.
He had feathers, unidentified goo,
and at least one homemade sculpture made out of baby teeth.
- I was simultaneously afraid of and fascinated by Travis,
and I feel the same way about today's episode.
- That's right, Link.
Because we've scoured the weird backpack of the internet,
eBay, and found the strangest things it has to offer
all in the name of one of our favorite games,
it's time for (big band jazz music)
'Guess That Price On eBay For That Weird Thing."
Please welcome our first and only guest
who can't get sloppy mouth kisses from Grandma
on account of his mouth herpes, it's Link Neal!
(audience cheers) - Hey!
- Welcome back, man.
- Yeah, it's good to be here on the show.
- And reprising her starring role
as the woman who womans the board, Stevie.
(audience cheers)
- Thank you.
- Hey, Stevie.
- Hey, it's been so long since I've been standing here
next to a board doing this.
- I know so much fun.
- Oh my goodness, it's like old times.
- Okay, Link, you remember how this is played, right?
- I'm gonna be good at this.
- Yeah, yeah.
So what I'm gonna do is I'm gonna tell--
- $35.
- Too early.
I'm gonna tell you about an eBay item, a weird eBay item,
and then I'm gonna give you the option
between two different prices as what it might be,
and if you get five of these right,
you get either $1 or what's in the mystery box?
- Oh, you know I'm gonna choose that mystery box.
- All right, first up is vintage large one-of-a-kind
creepy ceramic finger weird oddity unusual odd.
(laughs) - Oh gosh.
- That is the official name.
The seller describes it as an unusual conversation piece
to put in your collection of oddities.
I've never seen anything like it,
and it appears to be homemade.
Again, that's all from the seller.
- Ooh.
- Is the asking price $35 or $350?
- Well, I'm trying to get a sense of scale
using the size of those bricks
assuming those are standard-size bricks.
- Assuming those are standard-size bricks.
- And that is a big freaking which finger, man.
I mean, gosh, does it come with the desk underneath it?
- I mean, I do have a giant toe at home just like this,
but a finger that's just plain weird.
- You're actually not lying.
I've seen it, and it is weird.
I also have a whale vertebrae.
$35, - And a large wooden chain.
- Don't start bragging about all the crap you've got.
- Hey, I'm just saying.
- $350, I think that thing's paper mache.
I think somebody wants to get rid of it.
I don't know, $35!
- All right, let's see. - Okay, let me open
this window thing, ready?
- Yep.
(buzzard buzzes) - Just like old times,
You're wrong!
- $350 for a big ugly a finger?
- I mean, that thing is homemade.
Did you not hear, it's homemade?
- I give a finger to that finger.
- All right, next item, we've got Lorenzo Hudson
star of USPS commercial signed modeling poster.
Now if you're one of the millions of people who don't know
who Lorenzo Hudson is, don't feel too bad.
He's a model that appeared in a commercial
for the US Postal Service that aired
during the Super Bowl last year.
The seller says this headshot of Lorenzo
is a truly unique add to your collection.
How much will it cost to have this
little slice of Hollywood in your home?
$2,500 or $5,000? (laughs)
- What?
- Those are your options, Link.
- What, I don't even see the signature.
- It's on there.
I think it's on his shoulder.
I don't know where it is.
Maybe it's on the back.
- Lorenzo Hudson?
- While you're contemplating that, I wanna let you know
that a new fancy fast food dropped today
over on the Mythical Kitchen channel.
Go watch it!
Not now, later.
Check it out and subscribe.
Oh dang, look at all the stuff
we're releasing on the internet.
- See how slipped that little promo in there
while you're thinking about that $2,500 or $5,000.
- Should I start going against my instincts,
or should I be confirmed that my instincts are bad.
- It's early.
- It is kind of early.
- My instincts tell me that this is stupid
and that's stupid,
but this is approximately half as stupid
which is still a lot of stupid.
So I'm going with half as stupid,
but still too stupid $2,500.
(buzzard buzzes) Always go full stupid, Link!
Always go full stupid.
- Is this a joke?
I mean, no one actually bought this.
- That's what it is listed as.
Remember, this isn't what it was sold as.
This is what it is listed as.
- This is Lorenzo himself.
- (laughs) I didn't say I like it.
All right, you're O for two.
Here's the next item.
This is the vintage long legs doll, bendy cloth,
24 inches, stuffed unusual weird baby.
The seller describes the doll as cuddly in her own way,
pretty in face, creepy in body with elongated limbs,
which incidentally is how Stevie
described herself on her resume.
(everyone laughs)
- Creepy, funny.
- Elongated limbs.
- What's it selling for, $35 or 79.99?
- Okay, we're back in the realm of reasonable.
I mean, this thing is two-foot tall.
Hmm, how much would I pay for this little Stevie?
(laughs) - Please.
- So my instincts tell me,
I think you can get away with 79.99,
and I've already decided
I'm gonna be going against my instincts,
and I'm saying $35.
- All right.
(grunts)
(bell dings) - Yes!
- The streak is broken!
Going against my instincts.
I'm actually kind of sad that I won.
What's happening? (laughs)
- All right, $35, you were right, Link.
Let's see the next item.
This is the ultra rare goldfish triplets in jewelry box.
- What?
- This is an exact product description.
So not really sure why, but I had a dream
that I sold goldfish on eBay to make money
to start my business, and the very next day I came home,
there were these three goldfish at the top of the box
I opened, I was like, you know what, maybe I'm nuts
or maybe this is a sign.
I won't lie to you, I see no value in them
except the funny prank putting them
in a jewelry box I found.
Are they worth a hundred thousand?
Absolutely not, but my dream is priceless, and I'm poor-oh.
So if you feel like blowing money on these,
you would be giving a young guy a real chance
of living his dreams of starting a company.
If you have any questions, feel free to shoot a message.
Thank you.
- Okay, okay, thanks for the novel.
- Are these golden triplets listed as $199.99,
or did this goldfish glutton go for the gold
and asked for the full 200 bucks?
- Okay, okay.
(laughs) I love these.
- Come on. - I love it when we do this.
- Now, so this is three goldfish fused together.
If you were presented with these
at the top of the box, Stevie?
- At the top of the box?
- Would you pull them out?
- On top of the goldfish box. (laughs)
- Would you just pop it in your mouth and eat it,
or would you break them apart, and eat them one at a time?
- I tend to just stare forward and shove snacks in.
So I would just eat them all together and not notice it.
- Stare forward - You would eat them
without even knowing. - and shove it in.
Stare forward and shove it in.
I'm guessing.
Oh gosh.
I'm gonna go with my instincts again.
- Okay, all right.
- With that essay, I think that 99 cent thing
is like a little added humor.
This guy's looking for every turn to be an opportunity
for a little laugh,
and he got a little giggle out of that.
199.99.
(buzzard buzzes) - Your reasoning was sound,
but your answer was wrong.
- Okay.
- All right, Link.
- Well, I'm just gonna stare forward, and.
- Shove it in.
- Shove away. (laughs)
- All right, moving right along, our next item
is a 30-plus year old condom found in a record sleeve.
- In a record sleeve?
- Yes, this 1989 Protex contracept plus condom
was found in a record sleeve purchased at a flea market.
The date on the back reads 6-1-89.
You remember that day, Link, the day you turned 11!
- It's got my birthday on a condom?
- And in case you were wondering,
it should be stored at room temperature.
- That's kind of ironic to have your birthday on a condom.
- What's the price on this Jimmy hat, Jack?
(laughs) $1 or $7?
- Okay, this is a steal either way.
- Now keep in mind it comes with
- [Both] anti sperm formula
- which was also my nickname, guys.
(everyone laughs)
I don't even know how that makes sense, I'm sorry.
- Oh gosh, $1 or $7?
I mean, $7 is still a steal, but you know what,
I'm going against my instincts, $1!
(bell dings) - Yeah!
- That's the way it works!
- My instincts were right for being wrong, again.
- You got to get all the rest of these right, so.
- I can do it.
- Let's take a look at the next item.
The Dimitri vodka bottle full of cigarette ashes.
It took years to fill, 1989 to 1993.
- Okay, so you got some vintage cigarette butts
in a vintage vodka.
- Yeah, how much for this baron booze bottle brimming
with blistered butts, $195.09 or 19.59?
- This is both weird scenarios of money.
Yeah, a lot of work went into this.
It represents, I think someone who's selling it
still has a sweet spot in their heart for it,
and that they're gonna price it pretty high
for no good reason except sentimental value,
but I'm going against my instincts once again
because they always fail me, which is great, 19.59.
(buzzard buzzes) - It's a tricky game, Link.
It's a tricky thing, I'll tell you.
I'm sorry, I'm down for you.
- I'm waffling a lot.
- You know what, if you get all the rest of these right,
I'm still gonna give you what's in the mystery box.
- Thank you. - Yeah.
- All right, the next item, prison art.
- [Link] Oh, nice.
- Now, this is real art created by real prisoners.
This is a hot commodity on eBay.
- Mona Lisa, huh?
- Look at this Mona Lisa mommy drawn by a tortured artist
who may or may not have tortured someone in real life.
I don't know, I don't know what he did.
Okay, how much is Leonardo de Clinky (laughs) asking for,
$20 or a cool 2,000?
This thing measures six by nine inches,
and it's on art paper.
- Six by nine, that's like a little photograph.
- You think that's six inches?
- I think that's about six by nine right there.
Four by six is a photograph.
Six by nine.
- There you go.
Okay, it's not great, that's not a great rendering,
but maybe it was the pencil's fault.
Ah,
no way is it two, I mean $2,000,
when you say, well, you know someone in prison drew it.
You know that's when you pointed it out.
When you frame it and stuff, people walk by,
and you're like, well, I paid two grand for it,
but you know someone in prison drew it.
- Yeah yeah yeah yeah, yep, yep.
Gotta get this right to keep the dream alive.
- So you want me to guess 2,000,
but I'm gonna go against my instincts
to succumb to your manipulation, and I'm gonna say
the fair price is 20, but then I'm gonna go against that
and say, yes, for some reason they want two grand for this.
(snaps)
- Let's reveal it.
(buzzard buzzes) It was just 20.
(laughs) Okay.
- You messing with me, man.
You didn't want me to get that.
- If you get this last item right,
I'm gonna give you the choice between
- [Both] a dollar or the mystery box.
- The last item is a vintage Mr. Big Mouth
amusement park circus sideshow trash garbage can.
- Ooh, that's.
- Who apparently swallows everything.
- Okay, you put your trash in his mouth.
I get it. - Okay, Link.
Again, this is what's on the line.
Either a dollar.
- Oh, you wanna get Stevie to move it because I mean.
Stevie, could you hand Link the mystery box?
- Yes, yes.
- Thank you.
That's what's on the line.
- Thank you.
What's in the mystery box or the dollar.
- It's pretty light.
- Is this thing worth $799.99
or a whopping $17,000.99,
1,799.99.
- Good gosh.
800 or 1,800?
- How big is that, Rhett?
- I don't have a scale, but keep in mind
that this was a follow-up to the much less successful
vintage Mr. Small Mouth amusement park
circus sideshow trash garbage can.
'Cause the small mouth, you couldn't get a lot of things
in there except cotton swabs.
(laughs) - Yeah, yeah, yeah.
That's just disturbing like how his eyes are closed
and his mouth is open, it's just weird.
Yeah.
- Would you like this in your house?
- Man, no.
I mean, I wanna choose the the least of the two,
but then I wanna go against my instinct,
and then I wanna go against going against my instinct,
(snaps) but that's.
I don't really track any longer as to what I can rely on.
- This is a complicated.
- So I am gonna go with $1,799.99.
- Okay. - Doesn't make sense.
- But?
Oh, you're staying, you're, that's.
- You're gonna stick with that, huh?
- Okay.
- Yeah, you know what, I'll switch.
$800.
- All right, let's see.
You're, okay.
- Let's see.
(bell dings) You were right, Link!
Yeah!
I'll take the mystery box.
- All right, open it up.
- Keep your dollar.
- Now, Link, I wanna let you know,
we tried to get the condom, but they got lost in the mail.
(laughs) - Really?
- So instead we got this.
- You tried to get the condom.
- This is taxidermy frogs playing shooting pool man
cave billiards real frogs P1.
- P1?
How much did we pay for this?
- 24.95.
- Those are real frogs?
- Real frogs, P1.
Congratulations, Link, you earned it.
- How do they even pool like that?
I don't know.
I think they just look forward and shove it in.
- All right, thanks for subscribing and clicking that bell.
- You know what time it is.
- Hey, I'm Mike.
- I'm Mike.
- I'm Zack.
- And we're skiing at Crystal Mountain in northern Michigan,
and it's time to spin the Wheel of Mythicality.
- Didn't you think the last guy was gonna say
- [Both] Mike.
- Yep.
Should've changed it to Mike. Mike, Mike, Zac.
Click the top link to watch us play
Haunted or Hell of a Deal in "Good Mythical More,"
and to find out where the Wheel of Mythicality
is gonna land.
- I feel like.
- Oh! (laughs)
- Oh my god, I am so sorry.
Ah, man, this is why I can't have nice things.