- Cheers!
(glasses clinking)
Girl, let's get you some gin!
I'm just hammered.
- [Ariel] I'm just gonna do what I want!
- These dogs know their shit.
This dalmation drives a fire engine.
(laughing)
Hi, I'm Ned Fulmer.
- Yes, you are.
- That's where you say, "and I'm Ariel Fulmer".
And then we say,
"and we're parents".
(upbeat rock music)
- I'm Ariel Fulmer
- And I'm Ned Fulmer.
And we're parents
who are about to get really drunk
and explain Paw Patrol to our sober child-free friends.
The video will be divided into five segments.
First, the characters.
Second, the toys.
Third the movie.
Fourth, how it impacts us and our children.
And finally, how it impacts the world.
And at the very end,
our three sober friends are gonna give us a verdict.
Will they check it out with a thumbs up
or do they think we're drunk idiots?
Let's start drinking.
(energetic rock music)
(Ned laughing)
Nick, unless you got any more questions,
I think we're ready to--
- [Nick] I think so.
- Bring on the (indistinct).
- Hi, my name is YB,
I'm a senior editor here at Try Guys,
and a food baby. (laughs)
So Nick asked me,
"Do you know a "Paw Patrol"?"
And I said no. (laughs)
What is that?
And he said, "That's perfect, you're in the video."
- What's up, what's up
Will Witwer here.
Post production coordinator for the Try Guys.
The Try Guys Media Universe is all under my thumb,
so I'm not 100% sure what this video's about.
I know it's about the show "Paw Patrol".
I'm a 30-year-old man who lives by himself,
so I don't watch Paw Patrol.
- What's up, I'm Zach.
I have never watched Paw Patrol
because I'm an adult human,
but I have seen a couple think pieces about it,
so I'm coming in with some opinions.
We're doing shots off camera now?
(laughing)
- Zach is upset that we're not filming this.
Fine (laughing)
- [Ariel] I was about to walk into the camera
and he told me to stop.
- Oh God, it's gin.
Oh God it's gin.
- [Ariel] What is happening?
- [Nick] Get in there, get in there.
- They gave us our own bowls of snacks.
- It's gonna be a lean night. - Zach and YB,
you have to share a bowl of snacks.
- [Ned] You can have mine if you want.
- No, no, no. - It's okay.
- [Zach] That's for daddy.
- Ned, eat your snacks!
- I'm just trying to butter them up.
- Oh do we need to get buttered up for this? (laughs)
- I guess we do.
- Why are you trying to butter them up?
- Well so, at the end of this video,
you're just gonna give us a thumbs up or a thumbs down,
are you gonna check out Paw Patrol or not?
- Friends, we're here today to discuss Paw Patrol.
- Hell yeah!
- What do you know about Paw Patrol?
- Nothing.
- [Ariel] Great. Will?
- We've never watched it - I have no idea
- Well, I assume it's a TV show.
Ned and Ariel have kids
so maybe it's a show their kids are watching
but I don't know why they're explaining it to me.
(laughs) I don't have kids, so.
- They're all cops I think.
That's really the only thing I know,
is that this show is essentially "cop-aganda".
- Zach? - Nothing?
- Never watched it.
- But you have feelings.
- Oh, I have feelings about everything.
I'm a very opinionated person.
- What are your preconceived notions?
(laughing)
- We're gonna talk about the characters.
- Let me tell you about Paw Patrol
Let me tell you about the characters of "Paw Patrol".
- What is Paw Patrol?
- Okay, so you know our kids, right?
- Guys, Paw Patrol is a way if you just have like,
just like 10, just like 5 minutes-
(Zach laughs) - Let me tell you,
let me just tell you,
let me just tell you about our children.
- Have a glass of wine with your wife
while you just make some dinner
(ariel shushing) for the goddamn whole family.
(Zach laughing)
- We've got Chase, Marshall
- [Ariel] Rocky - [Ned] Rocky.
- Are they all different animals?
No, they're all dogs.
(indistinct)
(laughing) - The wine!
- YB, you got a dog right? - Yes.
- [Ned] Zach you got a dog, right?
- [Zach] I got a dog.
- Turns out, Paw Patrol,
it's all about dogs.
- But okay, Louis, there's a dog in Paw Patrol
that's called "Everest".
- [YB] Everest?
- Can you imagine what that dog is?
- [Ned] They're like the snow patrol dog.
- [Ariel] He's a snow patrol dog!
- Aw!
- He's a Husky! - Oh my God!
- I know!
- [Ned] He rescues people from avalanches.
- I know, I know, he's so sweet.
Okay so, Paw Patrol,
they just rescue people.
- A bunch of rescue dogs.
- Rider is a 10-yeah-old kid! - He's a boy.
- He's a 10-year-old boy!
- If you're a kid, you can see yourself in Rider.
- He's a human boy. - He's a human boy!
And he adopts all these dogs.
- Right.
- Wait, he's a human boy with his own private police force?
(laughing)
- No, no, no. - Basically.
- It's a civil servant force
- They save people. - They're all rescue dogs.
- [Ariel] They save people!
- A big misconception!
You guys make garbage, right?
You put it on the street in the morning.
- I don't make garbage. (laughing)
- I thought you meant here at Try Guys.
- Yeah, I thought so too. (laughing)
- You make garbage-
- Sometimes. - You make garbage.
You make garbage
- You guys produce trash and recycling
and put your bins on the curb?
- [YB] Yeah?
- There's a sanitation engineer that picks it up.
You know what that dog's name is?
- Trash?
(laughing)
- No.
- Rubble.
- [YB] Oh, okay.
- There's a municipal services dog?
- Babe, it's not Rubble.
- Oh, it's Rocky.
No, it's Rubble.
- [Ariel] No, Rubble- - [Ned] It's Rocky.
- Rubble is the um, construction dog.
I think we need to mute him.
(laughing)
- So I mean, I guess my first question is,
what exactly are they patrolling?
- Oh, let me tell you.
Don't talk.
(laughing)
- No, Ariel, Ariel.
That was funny, but I'm a very integral part of this video.
(laughing)
- So, every episode of Paw Patrol is-
- Somebody's in trouble!
- And they rescue them.
- Oh, a human's in trouble?
- Oftentimes humans - Or a dog, or a fish.
- Mhm. - Or anything.
- Each of the dogs, they have like a specialty, right?
There's a fireman dog.
- Marshall - The name is Marshall.
- Ah, that make's sense.
- Isn't that a sweet name? - That's cute, yeah.
- That's a sweet name, right?
- Here's here's the main plot of the movie.
- There's a movie.
Guess what?
We've skipped 5 episodes ahead, guys.
- Big-ass, pompous-ass, self-important, aggrandizing,
like, cats-fan of a mayor called, "Mayor Humdinger".
- [Ariel] Mayor Humdinger loves cats.
- Super selfish.
He builds his (beep) like, Mayor Humdinger Towers
and he brings his (beep) machine that like,
sucks up all the bad weather
and only makes it clear skies.
And then, oh what do you (beep) figure, it backfires.
And then, it's spewing out like,
all week's worth of bad weather.
- Sounds dope!
- That's a good idea.
- Do they learn, like in classic children's TV,
you know, they go on an adventure
and there's a life lesson.
- Absolutely. - I think the main thing
kids learn in Paw Patrol is like-
- Save people. - Try and help people.
- By...
becoming a cop dog.
- Civic servant.
- Okay so, I knew that was gonna come up at some point
- [Ariel] Civic servant!
- One of them-
- I'm sorry.
- One of them is cop dog!
(beep) house burning down,
(beep) recycling on the street,
(beep) try and build shit!
One of them is a cop dog!
- But they essentially represent a private series
of services available and commanded by a 10-year-old boy.
- (laughs) Exactly.
- Why don't you guys like it?
- 'Cause it's (beep) annoying as hell sometimes!
(laughing)
Sometimes, you just watch these shows over and over
and over and over and over again.
(sighs)
(laughing)
It's not for you.
(laughing)
It's for your 4-year-old.
And you're like, I don't wanna watch this anymore.
And then (beep) Twitter sphere dudes like Zach are like,
"It's cop-aganda!"
And you're like,
You don't understand (laughing)
the first thing about my life.
The goddamn child is not pulling my leg for a minute.
(beep) Zach on Twitter up in my shit!
- What did I say on Twitter?
- You said, "All Paw Patrols are bastards."
(laughing)
Bring out (beep) toys, Nick!
(laughing)
Meet Rubble with his sweet face.
- This is new to me.
I really thought they were all cops
- 100%, well, it's called a "Paw Patrol", right?
- Yeah, patrol.
- Like you know, they're like, you know cops on the beat.
They're dogs on the beat.
- You thought they were all cops?
- Yeah . - All of this (beep) show
is just to sell toys! - [Will] Yeah.
- And goddamn it, the toys are incredible!
- [Zach] Toys are cool.
- Do any of the dogs ever die?
(Zach laughs) - No! God no!
- Is this rated PG-13? - There's no death!
- We got six characters,
one of them gotta go,
who's getting it?
- The kid dies first.
(laughing)
- [Ariel] The kid (beep) dies first.
- [Ned] Rider is such an awkward character.
- Rider, Rider is the (indistinct) character!
- I know what- - These dogs know their shit!
- I know what my life purpose is.
- This dalmation drives a fire engine!
(laughing)
- Do you guys have enough snacks?
But before you-
- I think we have plenty snacks.
- Are you,
do you, do you have,
are all your needs met?
- Are all my needs met?
- You have a glass of wine!
- No, I don't.
That can go in 3 seconds, count it.
- As entertainers I need to know.
- Not what I asked you to do.
- Do you have all your needs met?
YB, you have not had a sip of whatever that pink thing is,
whatever that pink drink is.
- Pink lemonade.
- No, okay.
(beep) (beep) that.
(laughing)
Let's get you some gin.
- Do you wanna drink today?
- I wish you told me, Nick,
that if we're drinking
'cause I have to take pepsin before I drink
otherwise I get Asian glow, so. (laughs)
(Ariel wooing)
- Girl, let's get you some gin.
- I didn't take my pepsin!
- YB's not drinking?
- Well then, I'll drink for YB.
(laughing)
- So I'm confused about this video.
- This video, girl, girl, girl - Wait
- It's a multimedia franchise - Are we talking
about the YouTube video?
- Multiple seasons on Nickelodeon!
- No, this video. - A movie and a sequel!
- The one we're filming right now.
- What?
- Oh, this video. - This video?
- The current video. - The video we're filming.
- This video right now.
- Why are we..
- Here?
(laughing) - [Ariel] Why are we here?
- Are you somehow trying convince us to like it?
- It was Ariel's birthday.
We were hammer drunk.
- Were at a- - We were hammer drunk
- We were at an Italian restaurant,
hold my hand. (laughs)
- We were at an Italian restaurant.
We were hammer drunk.
- You remember.
- (whispers) I wasn't there.
- Yeah you were. - We were extreme-
- (whispers) I wasn't. - You were.
- (whispers) I wasn't. (YB laughs)
- He might not have been.
- (whispers) I had COVID. (chuckles)
- At that time? - (beep) me!
(laughing)
- [Ned] You were the one person who wasn't there.
I don't think YB cares about this.
Anyways, we were all hanging out pretty drunk one time
and we started explaining Paw Patrol
to the people, meaning Eugene, Zach and Keith.
- (whispers) I wasn't there.
- And then we all thought to ourselves like,
"Hey this could be a pretty good idea
for a video, internet concept of drunk people explain thing
to sober people.
It's just,
I don't know, man, what (beep) else we gonna do?
- Okay. (laughing)
- I know that each of you
want to have children eventually.
- Yes.
- Altogether. - Altogether.
Like you all want to- - We're in a throuple.
(laughing)
- You're in a throuple
and you want to have one like, fabulous child.
Imagine you have a kid who is like,
"Weapons are good", right?
Okay and then imagine - I can imagine.
- [Ariel] And then imagine-
- I loved guns as a kid. - Absolutely.
- Okay. and then you have a kid who's like,
"Wait a second, maybe I can save people.
Maybe I can be the force of good."
So many forces of good!
- So Wes is learning to be good.
- He's learning to be good
and to save people.
Bring us the toys!
I'm 100% taking this home to Wes
because Rubble is his favorite.
- Now we're moving on to the toy portion of the video.
- Let me talk to you about-
(Ariel screaming)
- Whatever the (beep) you thought about Paw Patrol,
let me reassess your brain hole
with how (beep) awesome the toys are.
Is this cartoon show all about selling toys?
Answer yourselves.
- Yes.
- Yes! - Yes!
- Now let's talk about,
are these toys (beep) dope as hell?
- Yeah, - These are pretty cool.
- The answer is yes!
- Wait, I'm sorry-
- These toys are incredible!
Just slap this shit,
bam into this (beep) bam!
Bam and it poops it's shit out!
That's it!
That's so cool, man!
- Press the button. - This one?
- Is that supposed to like, demolish this building?
- Whoa! - Wow!
- Now that's cool.
- You can still say ACAB just, don't say APPAB.
(laughing)
Corruption is real!
Man, these guys are what civil servants should be.
They present an idealized version
of what the world's like, civil services should be
which is helping people, rescuing people.
- Absolutely.
- You know.
- I like (beep) - Rescuing shit.
- I agree with you.
- What? (laughing)
- Uh, yeah.
- This is all about - And also,
it gives mommy daddy some time.
- But like, wasn't there a point for this video?
- This video?
I don't know.
- That's what I was asking
What was the point of this video?
(laughing)
- All right, judges.
So, imagine yourselves as parents of a 4-year-old.
Would you want them to watch Paw Patrol?
Thumbs up or thumbs down?
Yes or no.
There's three of you.
Two out of three means we win the video.
(laughing)
- There's competition.
- I have two ratings.
My first one is,
if I'm a parent, definitely thumbs up.
- [YB] Yeah.
- But as a 30-year-old single man,
it's a huge thumbs down. (YB laughs)
- Would you be okay having your three
to four year old child watching?
- Yeah, for sure.
I mean the cop-aganda thing is more or less a joke
because of it's like, it's a children's show.
It's not supposed to depict nuanced social issues.
- (beep) Obviously!
That's why like, Zach should get out
of my (beep) Twitter mentions with this bullshit!
- I came in here with a thumbs down,
but after hearing you guys,
I believe that I would try
to not have my kids watch this show,
and then I would just give the (beep) up
and say, "whatever you want".
So, I'm giving you a thumb to the side.
- Wow! (YB and Will Applauding)
I don't know how to feel!
- [YB] That's pretty good then.
- [Ned] That's better than thumbs down
So, I guess that's an improvement.
- It's like a reluctant thumbs up,
but I'm not gonna feel good about it.
- So you like, kind of feel a little weird
about saying APPAB to me?
(laughing)
- Okay so, if I was a parent,
I would thumbs up.
- Ayy! - Ayy!
- Because like you guys said,
I just want them to be distracted.
- YB, let's show off that rock.
- [Ariel] Ayy!
- All right, to Paw Patrol! - To Paw Patrol.
- (singsong) Paw Patrol!
Paw Patrol!
Yes!
(upbeat rock music)
- I'm still invited over on Sunday, right?
- Absolutely.
(Zach laughing) - I mean, I guess.