- Put a vibrator on the Roomba, welcome to Westworld.
(intense electronic music)
- Welcome to Spoiler Party, where we talk about movies,
TV, and other stuff.
Today, we are watching Westworld, the Season One finale.
Who has seen it?
(ding ding)
Okay.
- We watched it together.
- Yeah we did.
- I have never seen an episode of the show at all.
- Do you know what it's about?
- It's about a adult-ish theme park where its
western, late 1800s, where people can go
and live out their cowboy fantasies.
- When you say, "adult-ish" I automatically
think something sexual.
- Yeah, you can go and have sex with these robots.
- Oh!
(dramatic orchestral music)
- Are these the kind of robots where if you rip off
their fake skin it's just metal?
- No it's this white silicon thing.
- Oh so they're like 3-D printed.
- It's weird it's like their dipped in milk.
- We talked about the milk baths,
but before that they were more robotic looking,
like she is now.
- Okay, so she's like a 3GS and now they're at an X.
- Yeah.
- Yet again, another unrealistic female body standard.
(laughs)
- She's not even all skin and bones--
- She's all bones.
(laughs)
- Are there black robots?
Or is it very historically accurate?
- The owner of the brothel is black.
- I'd be friends with her because that's where
I'd wanna work.
- She's very cool.
- You wanna work at the brothel?
- Oh no, I got brothel confused with saloon.
- Oh so it's both?
- I'd like to be the performer in the saloon.
Big Tit Daisy!
(laughs)
Singin' a number, drinking everybody under the table,
a-one, two, three, four.
- Liza Minnelli over here.
- That's who I'm gonna be for Halloween next year.
A saloon hoe.
- Big Tit Daisy?
- Big Tit Daisy.
- Just workin' at the good ole brothel.
- Just workin' at the brothel, tryin' to make
an honest living.
- That's not an honest living--
- It's an honest living!
- You're name's Big Tit Daisy.
(laughs)
- It's not honest at all.
- Is it wrong?
I mean it's not wrong!
I'm Big Tit Daisy.
- This place feels more real than the real world.
Except it isn't because you can't really fight back.
- Do they like screen people before they're like,
"You can go into this world?"
- No, it's all just money.
You got cash?
Welcome to Westworld.
- Laying on top of a hill with a friend, looking over
at a bunch of people, that would be what I did.
- Brokeback Mountain.
- Yeah, actually, exactly.
- Brokeback Mountain?
- I'd Brokeback Mountain the (bleep) Out of Westworld.
- Okay, what are some Pickup Lines
that the characters would use to pick someone up in a bar?
- You like milk?
(Laughs)
(beep)
- I would look at Westworld as really nice practice for me
and I would go there and I would try to hit on robots
and just see what lines work.
- But they're not a good gauge of whether
or not it would work, right?
- They seem human-like.
- I guess.
- Is it consensual sex?
- Not all the time, you do bad things.
- It's the same question as, "Is it consensual sex
if you have sex with a vibrator?"
- Hmmmmm.
- Is it?
Because the vibrator doesn't talk back to me.
- You could get a vibrator that does.
- Neither one has consciousness.
- There's gotta be talking vibrators.
- I don't even know.
- There's gotta be vibrators that'll
read you a book or something.
- Gotta little speaker in it.
- It's like hooked up to Audible.
- Yeah, Audible.com
- So what would your pickup line be?
- Oh I don't know yet, I would need the drive
to think about it.
- Think about James Marsden.
- Hey James.
- James Marsden just shot every other robot in the park.
It's just you and him.
Now pick him up.
(laughs)
- You know what--
- So you're standing, there's dead bodies all around you,
covered in blood, go!
- Oil and blood everywhere.
- James, you've been through a lot today.
- Uh-huh.
- You seem tense.
(laughs)
Let's go work out some of that tension on a bed
with you on top of me.
This is why I can't pick up--
- I don't know if you need to specify the position,
I think "on the bed" you were there.
- Don't say with you on top of me,
just work out some tension?
- I think that's a better start than with you on top.
- Resume the show!
(laughs)
- Oh look at that (bleep).
(laughs)
- Oh is that a (bleep)?
Show me the (bleep)!
Rewind!
- No.
- I wanna see that (bleep)!
- There's plenty of (bleep) To be seen.
- Are you sure?
- Yes.
- In this there's a lot of (bleep)?
- There's plenty of (bleep).
(Dramatic Music)
- Is that him?
- Yeah.
- Oh my god!
- William.
- What!
- That's awesome, look at you guys.
- This is very exciting.
- So if you had to describe something at Westworld
in a Tweet, or your experience at Westworld in a Tweet,
what would it be?
- It's like that bad Kermit meme where it's like,
Good Kermit is like, "GO have fun at the amusement park,"
and then it's Bad Kermit like,
"Have sex and murder everyone
and try to take over the world."
- This is basically the real life Grand Theft Auto--
(laughs)
- (bleep) !
- Penises.
- Robot (bleep).
(Gunshots)
- What the hell is this show?
- That's the end?
- Yeah.
- Shit.
- I have so many questions.
I'm curious about season two.
I saw something people are talking about,
if Ford is really dead or not, Anthony Hopkins.
- Yeah, right, if that was a host.
- Because you can just make a fake you
and then he was murdered to cause the chaos
but Ford is really somewhere.
- I like that idea a lot.
- I like that.
- Just saying.
- I bet the very first scene of season two takes place
in a different world.
If not Shogun World then some other world.
- That's gonna be the effect of Westworld had
on this new world.
- It's like the Hunger Games, how one district's rebellion
causes like other rebellions.
- I wonder if they're gonna find out that all of them
have always been robots except for William
and then at the very end we find out that William
was in a Truman Show type thing,
once he figures that out,
that he's been played the whole time,
he kills himself.
- Wow.
- I couldn't even follow it, but I am like, yes.
- That sounds great.
Give it an Emmy.
- All of the robots think that they are special
and they think that they are finding a way out of it
but really they're programmed and everyone's programmed,
even the people that you think are other humans.
So William thinks that everyone else is other humans,
he's one of the other humans but really everyone's a robot
and everyone from all of it and it's for him to discover
and he didn't actually get...
- That's the game.
- Yeah, and then at the end he finds out that it was
only him playing the whole thing and then he kills himself.
- But he owns the whole company.
- I think he invented this.
- That's part of the game.
- That's wild.
- I'm with you!
He could've invented this 30 years ago
and then he's just in too deep and he forgot,
and now he's like...yeah.
- He's been playing it for that long.
- Exactly, so that's why he thinks it's real life
and he still has this fake narrative but it's actually--
I'm with you.
- So if we were to recast anyone in Westworld,
who would we pick?
- Oprah.
If she were to be cast as Anthony Hopkins,
they are opposite people.
Oprah could never be nefarious and conniving.
- That's almost scarier though.
That's scarier when someone tells you something
really (bleep) up with a smile.
Then it's more horrifying.
- We need an Oprah villain.
- Ed Harris' character would be funnier
if it was played by Tiffany Haddish.
I also thing that every character would be funnier
if they were played by Tiffany Haddish.
Or Kate McKinnon.
- Are we going for a comedy though.
- Of course every character would be
funnier with Tiffany Haddish.
(laughs)
- Would you rather be a black hat or be a white hat?
- That is deceiving because he's in a white hat, William,
and he's a bad guy.
- And Logan's in a black hat.
- I think everyone eventually becomes a black hat.
- I think everybody wears billed hats.
- I think I would just enjoy my life more in Westworld
as a white hat person.
- No, Big Tit Daisy picks black hat.
- Would you rather be a host and not know it
or know that you are a host.
- Be a host and not know it.
100%.
- Ignorance is bliss.
- All I'm saying, when I'm playing the Sims
and I put on freewill they get very confused
when you all of a sudden force them to do
something else.
It's better if you just take freewill off the table.
- Would you rather stay entirely in Sweetwater
or stay entirely in Pariah.
- Sweetwater's like the start town,
Pariah I don't remember.
- Pariah!
Give me some Sodom and Gomorrah!
- Have Logan as your tour guide or go it alone?
- Go it alone.
- Logan as my tour guide!
- I mean...
(laughter)
- Logan as my tour guide.
- Ben Barnes is hot but I don't want Logan to introduce me
to the robots I'm gonna (bleep).
I wanna find them on my own.
Call me a hopeless romantic but I would like to find
my (bleep)-able robots.
Without the influence of others.
- Who needs a robot when you have Logan?
- Spend one night alone locked in cold storage,
but could choose a host to keep you company,
or would you rather spend a night locked in jail,
with no one to keep you company.
- Okay, we know...
- Cold storage?
- Cold storage!
- Wait, why?
- Because then you have a host to keep you company.
But actually, one night, is not terrible.
- They're all naked, with their (bleep) Hanging.
- But you know, having sex, you sweat, you'll get more--
- You're not gonna have sex.
- But you can choose a host to keep you company.
I mean you could also talk to the host
but that's not where my mind went.
- I will meditate in the jail, I'm fine, I'll be warm.
- I need alone time.
- You know what we should do?
- What?
- Let's go to my apartment, we'll turn on my Roomba,
we'll watch it run into walls and you can also practice
your pick up lines on my Roomba.
- Let's do it.
- Put a vibrator on a Roomba, welcome to Westworld.
And then I'll be just the guy who fixes the Roomba
when you've destroyed it.
With your sex.
- Thanks for watching Spoiler Party.
Comment below your thoughts.
Let us know what you think about Westworld
and your predictions.
Below, say how I'm right and everyone else is wrong
about what's gonna happen in the next season.
- Don't do it.
- There's no way anything you said
is still gonna be still in this video.
(laughter)
(upbeat music)