(cell phone swiping)
(guitar strumming)
- Hello, I'm Ira Glass.
welcome to another episode of my new podcast.
Friends, who needs them?
You do.
This week challenge,
put yourself out there.
When the hand of friendship is offered to you, take it.
You can do it.
Now, go make some friends.
(crowd noises)
(Scooby sighs)
- Huh?
- Make friends, check.
Nice to meet you, Shelly and Sandy.
How was your day?
Oh, you want me to start?
How polite Sandy.
(Shaggy screams then Scooby jumps)
(blinking noises)
(sniffing)
I gotta warn you. It's got gummy worms,
tater tots and Ketchup leather.
- Hmmm.
- I know, no liverwurst.
It's not like me to forget the protein.
Yeah, I get it.
Nobody likes my sandwiches.
Whoa!
(chewing)
Mmmm, is that peppercorn?
- Sand!
(both laugh)
- There you are!
This mangy stray's done enough
damage for today. He's coming with me.
- He's not a stray.
- Is he your dog?
- He's like totally mine!
(whispers) If you want to be.
- I'd like that very much.
- Okay, then. What's his name?
- I don't have one.
- (stammers) his, his name's.
Snacks.
- What?
- Snacks?
- Uh, I mean, Scooby.
- Middle name?
- Dooby.
- Last name.
- Doo.
- All right.
If the dog has a middle name
then there's no punishment for damages or theft,
I don't like it, but them's the laws.
Well, have a good day, sir.
Mr. Doobie Doo.
(both laugh)
- I'm Norvel, but everyone calls me Shaggy.
- Raggy.
- No, it's Shaggy.
- That's what I said. Raggy!
- We'll work on it.
- Shaggy, you and your new friend better hurry up
if you want to trick or treat.
- Yay! Okay Mom! Let me show you my room.
(Scooby sniffs and soft music plays)
- Who's that?
- This is Blue Falcon. He's half man, half falcon.
- Ooh!
What's this?
- It's a bed. You sleep in it.
(both laugh)
- Soft! I never had a bed before.
In fact, I've never had anything before
- I ran out this afternoon and I got something for you.
I know we just met and I didn't want to seem too desperate
or, you know, come on too strong, but...
- I love it.
I promise I'll never take it off.
(soft music)
- As long as we have each other,
we'll be just fine on our own.
Uh...
- What's the hold up?
- The ball return won't return our ball.
(rolling and crashing)
- Oh, there it is.
- Zoinks! Like what is going on?
- Oh, no offense, but I think I like you better
as a bowling ball!
- Me too!
(robot zapping noises)
- (both screaming) Look out!
- What now?
- Follow my lead.
Who's hungry?
- Check out the specials!
- So, like, what are you guys in the mood to eat?
And please don't say human!
- Or dog!
(beeping)
- Okay, bowling alley yakatori.
And how about you guys?
Hot wings to share?
[Robots] Uh-huh
- Got it. And for you?
(beeping)
- Oh no! We're out of calamari!
[Robot Beeps And Scooby And Shaggy Scream]
(both panting)
- Did we lose them?
- I'm pretty sure we didn't!
(screaming)
Looks like this is goodbye old buddy.
- I never saw Paris.
(zapping)
[Both] Huh?
(spooky music)
(crashing)
- Oh man! Dig that crazy elevator.
You okay Scooby Doo?
- Yeah, I'm good.
(Scooby shakes)
Where are we?
(jumps and makes surprised noises)
- Do you realize where we are?
- No.
- Look around man.
The clean modern aesthetic, the cool blue color palette,
we're in
- IKEA!
- Falcon Fury!
Did you say IKEA?
- Nope. I said Falcon Fury, just like you.
- Scoob, somebody thinks we're important enough to...
- It's nice to be wanted.
(pinches Shaggy)
- Ouch! What was that for?
- Making sure this isn't a dream.
- You're supposed to pinch yourself.
(pinching each other and saying "Ow")
- Ahem,
finished?
(pinches and Shaggy says "ow)
- Yes!
- Uh, guys adventure's calling and it's for you.
- Hello adventure. Yes.
Will you take my name and number off your list?
- But Raggy, this is our chance!
- You really want to do this?
- Uh-huh!
- Well, I'm not going to let you do it without me.
After all, there is no I in Scooby and Shaggy.
Wait, is there? No. All good.
[Together] We're in.
- That's what I'm talking about.
- FYI, you are officially out of everything.
(both laugh)
- Yes! I love these guys.
- Prepare your taste buds for a Scoob Shag specialty.
(popping noises)
- Whoa! You put jalapeno peppers on your ice cream.
- Heat and sweet.
- It's our signature dessert
(spaceship opens)
- Hustle you two. We haven't got all day.
(whimpers)
- Second thoughts.
- Honestly, buddy, I'm on my fourth or fifth thoughts.
Oh man. This amusement park isn't very amusing.
(whimpers)
(dramatic suspenseful music)
- Hey did Dastardly get the anonymous tip, too?
- This way!
- Yikes!
(slams door)
(robots scurrying and clamoring to get in)
(sighs)
(both scream)
(banging whack-a-mole)
(score dings)
[Both] Awe!
- Haha, weak link, my butt.
(screams)
Whoa, dude. What do you want with us?
- I don't care about you. You're not remotely important.
It's the dog I need.
(zaps)
(Shaggy screaming)
(growls)
- Stay. Sit. Heel. Did nobody train this thing?
(shaggy screams)