- Oh, it's you again.
Hey, how's it going?
Didn't expect to see you here, but since you've dropped by,
how about we do a video about the 16 personalities?
But this week, you know what?
We're gonna get a little bit dark.
We're gonna talk about the dark sides
of each of the 16 personalities.
Don't let this sunny window fool you, okay?
We're talking about darkness.
Now, you might say, Frank, last week, you put out a video
called the strengths of each of the 16 personalities.
Why this week aren't you just calling it the weaknesses?
Because I think when you say, this is the weakness
of this type, yes, that is accurate,
but I think it can also give you the idea that, oh yeah,
that's just a weakness, that's something I'm bad at,
so I'll just have to avoid that as much as I can,
but here's the thing.
When you avoid this thing that you're weak at,
it actually causes a lot of darkness in your life.
It causes you fear, it causes you anxiety and pain
and it will cause recurring problems over and over again
in your life, and if you go into that darkness
and you conquer it, that weakness, that dark side
of your personality will no longer cause you such anxiety
ESTJ and ENTJ, and look, you should watch the video I did
about what are the strengths of each of the 16 personalities
'cause I talk about what extroverted thinking is,
what these types are doing all the time
without even realizing it, and the thing is
because they're doing that, because they're doing
extroverted thinking, what's logical, what just works,
how can we get to the goal we want?
They are suppressing the introverted feeling.
What they are feeling emotionally, what they like,
what they think is good, what matters to them,
and they feel like they are not allowed
to make decisions based on that introverted feeling.
Note, it's not that they don't have introverted feeling,
they don't have emotions.
No, no, no, they got them, but they feel
like they're not allowed to.
They have to do the extroverted thinking.
That's what they are responsible to do,
and so they're like, okay, I'm responsible to do this,
so let me just swallow the introverted feeling.
Let me just suppress the emotion, but like I said,
it's still there, and so they will have these times
where occasionally they bring out a bit
of that introverted feeling, right?
They'll be like, oh, this is what matters to me,
this is what I want to do based on the feeling I have,
and if they meet any resistance to it,
if anyone is like, oh, why?
Even if it's just an innocent question, they will freak out.
They will shut down.
They do not like it, and I think because of that,
they will also accidentally a lot of times
take things personally when they feel that
that introverted feeling is getting beaten up on.
Like they have to protect that with their extroverted
thinking, and extroverted thinking a lot of times
is just kind of blunt, can even be a little bit mean
because it doesn't care about people's feelings.
It's just trying to get to a solution, right?
But the introverted feeling is like,
but this is what matters to me.
What they need to do is learn to embrace
that introverted feeling and learn to be okay
with putting what they think matters first,
even if there's no logical backup for it.
Now we move onto the ESFJ and ENFJ, and they are similar
to the ENTJ and ESTJ except what they are suppressing
is introverted thinking.
That is where the freaking darkness is coming from
with these two types, and introverted thinking
is about what do I think is correct?
What do I think is true for me?
What's gonna work for me?
What is my understanding of this thing?
Every day, all day, these two types, ESFJ and ENFJ,
are just making sure they understand
everyone else's emotions and feelings.
That's where they thrive.
How are you feeling?
How can I understand how you feel
and we can all feel better together?
And so they're so outward-focused and they're ignoring
this inner compass about what is true for me?
Like I'm dancing around trying to make everyone else happy,
but at the end of the day, this isn't working
for me personally, but whatever, I'll just keep that down,
make sure everyone else is feeling good.
Similarly to the last two types, ENFJ and ESFJ
have this thing where if they bring out some kind
of logical opinion, they're like, what if we did this?
What if we did this this way?
This is how this could work.
If that gets picked at by anybody else,
they will shut down and be like, I am so dumb.
These two types are especially susceptible to feeling
like they are the stupidest person in the room
because they are trying to suppress
that introverted thinking, and I think they logically know,
I'm not stupid, but because they are so focused
on the emotions of everyone else
and feel like they can't stand up for what they think
is correct, what they think is logical,
they're not allowed to go there, it makes them feel like,
oh yeah, you're right, that was stupid.
Let me just back off of that and make sure that you're happy
about this, and the darkness with these two types,
if they just keep doing that over and over
and they're just looking outward at what's gonna make
everyone else happy, one day they're gonna wake up
and be like, this doesn't work for me anymore.
All of you idiots, I've been taking care of you bumbos.
I think I was trying to say dummy and dumbo
at the same time and I almost said bimbo.
While we're here, let's stop momentarily
and see if YouTube would like to show a commercial.
Thanks for sitting through that,
and if you're enjoying this video, hit the thumbs up button
or do a back flip out the window.
Next, let's move onto the ESTP and ESFP,
the extroverted sensing types who are really good
at just taking in life as it comes.
They're all about looking at the real world,
kind of unfiltered.
They're not trying to organize it
or necessarily put it in any kind of order.
It's just like, here's what's in front of me,
this is the way the world is,
and it's always about new, new, new.
Let me get this new experience, let me go to this new thing.
All the EPs, really, that's what their problem is.
It's always about the new next thing,
but extroverted sensors in particular,
it's about the real world actual new thing, new experience,
but what they are suppressing here is introverted intuition
and what happens when you are suppressing that,
the darkness that comes from that is you kind
of don't understand why things are happening.
Like you see all of the things going on around you
in the real world, but it can scare you.
I don't understand the pattern behind it
because intuition is about recognizing the patterns, right?
And so when you have introverted intuition
as your inferior function, you are not paying attention
to the patterns or you devalue the pattern to a degree
where you're not really paying attention to it.
You're just looking at every fact as it is,
as it comes to you, and then that can also surprise you.
When the pattern should be easy to see sometimes,
it's like, oh no, I didn't see that coming, oh crap.
There's like a fear of the future in many ways,
and because of that fear of the future,
I think these types try to not think about the future.
So that can be a problem obviously
because if you're not thinking about what's coming
around the bend, what am I gonna do?
And you're just constantly living around
what's happening now and trying to just go from thing
to thing, you could just end up being aimless.
Likewise, I think these types can have some problems
creating meaning for themselves in their life
because introverted intuition is
where meaning a lot of times comes from.
I mean, intuition is looking at the meaning beneath things,
and so when you are suppressing that, it's like,
I'm not looking too far beneath the surface
of what everything means and when it comes
to your own life, that's tough.
All right, then with the ENTP and ENFP,
the extroverted intuitive types, they likewise like
to keep moving around looking at the new,
but they are looking at the meanings.
They are looking at the patterns and the concepts.
They like to just find new ideas, new abstract ideas.
These are all the connections between things
and they are suppressing the introverted sensing,
which is getting all the facts in order,
looking at the real world and then for themselves,
getting it lined up, getting it squared away,
putting things away where they need to go.
Like in a simple way, it's just like making your bed.
As you can imagine, this is a major issue
because just on the one hand, it's like, oh,
crap is getting thrown everywhere
and I'm not figuring out where do I put my toilet paper?
I don't know why I came up with that example,
but for an ENFP and ENTP, the task of just cleaning up
their house, for example, not even the house, cleaning out
the closet, that is gonna be like the worst thing ever.
That is gonna be like, I don't really know
that it's worth going on living if I have to do this,
and part of it is that they just ignore it for so long,
they're like, I don't even know how to do this.
I think a lot of people, regardless of type,
don't really love cleaning, but with these two types,
they're like, I shouldn't even be responsible for that.
Why do I need to know where I'm putting my underwear away?
Look, I can find it at some point.
It doesn't really matter, but the other side of that,
having introverted sensing as an inferior function,
is that because they are so intuitively moving on from thing
to thing, a lot of times it's hard for them to just stop
and actually do something productive in life.
Introverted sensing is a lot about just the building blocks.
We do this one thing, we do this next thing.
Here's the line by line procedure of how we will get
from point A to point B, and if these types are doing
their extroverted intuition too much and feeling
like they don't need to stop and do things bit by bit,
one thing after the other, they're gonna find themselves
in a place in life where they haven't done much,
they haven't gotten very far
towards all the intuitive goals they had.
All right, let's move onto the IP types.
These are some of my favorites, man.
Let's go to the introverted thinkers first, ISTP and INTP.
The other thinkers we talked about, the ESTJ, ENTJ,
their problem was their own emotions.
So the INTP and ISTP, their problem
is other people's emotions, how other people feel.
Oh, crap.
For these two types, they're like, I am responsible
for making decisions based solely
on what I think is logical.
You know, other people's feelings, okay, they have them,
but I'm not responsible for that.
They can feel how they want to feel,
and if they don't like something, if this doesn't matter
to them, I'm just gonna ignore it.
I'm just gonna do what my brain is telling me to do.
I think with the thinkers, their dark side is maybe
a little bit more apparent, especially to feeler types
because it's like, okay, you're ignoring emotion.
Whether it's yours or someone else's, that's not good.
With these types, what happens then is they end up doing
a bunch of stuff where other people are like offended by it.
They're just doing their own thing, these two types,
they're like, this is logical to me.
What everyone else thinks, I don't know,
I'm not paying attention to that,
and everyone else says, we're gonna kill this guy.
This is unacceptable.
Like everyone else, this bad feeling fomenting, if you will,
and the INTP and ISTP are so oblivious to it
that it comes out of nowhere and shocks them at some point,
whereas people who are not dealing with this huge imbalance,
the other types, they can sort of see, oh,
these people are getting a little annoyed at what I'm doing.
Maybe I should see what they're feeling
and kind of deal with that.
These two types are like, no.
Now, the other side of that is extroverted feeling is a lot
about really let me also express how I feel,
let me talk about what matters to me, and the INTP
and ISTP are gonna feel really awkward about that.
They don't really like to talk about their emotions.
It's a little different than when I was talking
about the extroverted thinkers.
They don't even like feeling the emotion
or making decisions based on it, but for the ISTP and INTP,
the bigger issue is talking about it
and listening to other people talk about their emotions.
Ah, I don't want to do that.
All right, and while we're here, let's stop again
and see if YouTube would like to show another commercial.
Wow, this video's so long it gets two commercials,
and if you didn't hit the thumbs up button the first time,
hit it now, and if you hit it the first time,
hit it two more times.
Okay, then let's look at the INFP and ISFP,
the introverted feelers.
They're doing what the ISTP and INTP are doing,
but they're doing it with logic.
These two types, INFP and ISFP,
are just doing what I feel is right.
This is good to me, I like this, I'm following my heart,
everyone's telling me that this is not logical,
everyone else is telling me that I'm inconveniencing them
by doing this, but I'm not gonna listen to that.
Whatever, I'm following my heart.
I'm out here catching butterflies or whatever
like on the 16 personalities website.
So everyone around these two types is like,
you're being entirely illogical, what you're doing is dumb
and stupid, and not just judging them and being like,
you are dumb and stupid, but we all agree
that you are really causing issues by doing this
and we wish you'd listen to us
and participate a little bit in this conversation.
Oh man, and the thing that they do so often
where I'm like, please stop, is you'll give them advice,
you'll say, I hear what you're saying, I hear your problem
in life, here's my advice, here's my external logic,
this is probably what will work for you,
and they'll be like, okay, thanks,
and then they'll ignore it.
I mean, this is basically what I said in the video
what annoys me about each type, but the problem is,
the darkness there is they will have everyone
giving them this advice.
There could be 10 people giving them the same advice
and they still might go against it, and that will get them
into trouble because they're like, yeah, everyone else
is saying the same thing which statistically would indicate
that they are telling me something true, but you know what?
I'm obligated not to go with that.
I'm not responsible for what other people say is gonna work.
I'm responsible to following my heart.
So you can understand how that might
cause some catastrophic things to happen.
All right, let's move onto the IJ types,
the introverted sensors, ISFJ, ISTJ.
These types are very organized.
These are the flip of the extroverted intuitives, right?
Their problem is that they are so focused on getting things
in the real world organized that they never really want
to go outside of the box, never get outside of that
and think about new ideas, look at new concepts,
or even make new meanings out of things.
Now, these types' problems, it's somewhat similar
to the extroverted sensors.
They had a problem with suppressing intuition,
so it was like they couldn't make sense
of what was happening.
In some ways, it's the same thing going on here
except it's extroverted intuition that these two types
are suppressing, and so they don't like going for the new,
the new abstract concept, the new pattern.
So they will see this is happening factually,
this is happening factually, this is how everything
in my life is organized, but it's like they can't see
the possibilities, all the possible things
that could happen because of that.
They don't necessarily see the connection between all
of the different facts they have in front of them,
and very much like the extroverted sensors,
these types will be like, I didn't see why this happened.
I didn't see the pattern.
I didn't see the connection.
I saw everything that happened.
I saw it all lined up.
I can tell you everything that happened from A to Z,
but when it comes to me taking a guess
as to why it all happened, I can't do that, and you know,
these types are also very slow
to accept any kind of new abstract idea.
Anything that seems a little bit out there,
they'll be like, oh no, keep that away from me.
They'll be way, way slower to embrace any kind
of new idea like that because they're so far
into the real world and the way they have organized it
that if you come at them with this new concept explains
a lot of what's going on with you, they'll be like,
no, I'll just stick to what I know already.
I'll just stick to the facts that I know
and that I have right in front of me, and this explanation
you've come in for how it's all connected, no thanks.
All right, and last up, we have the INTJ and INFJ,
and these types have a similar problem to the last types
we talked about, except it's extroverted sensing
that they are suppressing, and you know, I have made a lot
of videos about INFJs in particular, and so a lot
of those videos circle around this idea
of inferior extroverted sensing, which is basically
like taking in new factual information
because the introverted intuitives are all about, let me see
how everything is basically the same thing intuitively.
Here's all the new info, here are all these things
in the real world, and here's how it's basically
all the same, it's basically all following the same pattern.
All of these different scenarios I can kind
of explain with the same word.
You know, like I said in my last video about the strengths
of these types, what they're doing all the time,
these types are always trying to reduce everything
and it makes them closed off to what is happening?
What is actually happening concretely around them?
And so because they have this tunnel vision,
I guess you could say, sometimes they're just not aware
of what is happening, and that can cause a lot of anxiety.
All the IJs have this anxiety about what are they missing?
Because their tunnel vision is so honed in on things,
and for the introverted intuitives, it's like,
I understand the pattern of what's happening here
and I can guess at what's gonna happen next,
but I don't even really know what is happening.
I'm not sure what is going on.
It's like, I know why, I just don't know what,
which is strange, right?
But, and they have that typical IJ problem where it's like,
if I need to find an answer, I'll just go back
to intuitively what I already have figured out, the pattern
that I already see here rather than looking to actually see
what is obvious, what is right in front of me factually.
The facts, whatever, I can take them, I can leave them.
They don't matter as much as this conceptual idea I have
of them, and what can happen is the physical world
will just come out of nowhere and destroy their lives.
It's funny, they'll be so intuitive,
but then they'll get surprised by things happening
in the real world because they were so focused in
on the abstract world and ignoring what was happening
in the real physical world that things build up
and happen before they have a chance to catch them.
So for these two types, the world feels like a place
that's just about to explode at any minute.
Everything's about to go wrong.
Things are gonna erupt into chaos
'cause that's just how their mind works.
I'm so focused on the abstract that the sensory
just catches me off guard all the time.
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