(retching)
(chewing)
- I hate it. I hate it so much.
- Um, yeah.
I have a pretty simple relationship with mayo,
and it's that I hate it.
I [bleep]ing hate mayonnaise.
- Like a spoonful of mayo has the most
disgusting consistency I can think of.
- It's not very appealing to me.
It's very much like an eggy, vinegary, gross.
- Mayonnaise is a mystery to me.
- But the funny thing is, if you hide mayo from me,
I can't tell there's mayo really in it.
- Yeah that's, that's a disgusting amount of mayo.
- See, this is bacon.
There it is.
There's something great, and right next to it
is just a [bleep]ing lard of lard.
- Do I have to take a bite?
- Uh, you know.
Alright, here goes.
(melodramatic music) (chewing)
It sort of disguises itself nicely.
So like, as much as I said I hate it before,
and I do, I still do, this is passable.
I wouldn't return this if I asked for no mayo,
I'd be like, whatever.
Euggh. Huh huh huh euggh.
- (wimpers)
- Ugh.
- Like who enjoys that?
I don't understand how you enjoy mayonnaise, people.
- Ugh. Ugh.
(coughs)
(chokes)
- If it has mayo in it, fine.
Just don't, like, show me your cards too much.
But mayo straight is, makes me wanna jump off a bridge.
- Ugh.
Not that bad. Not that bad.
Not as bad as I thought.
Tangy.
(melodramatic music)