- You know, in any relationship that's progressing,
it's really important to know
whether both people are on the same page
as to how they see that relationship in the longterm.
Do you see this thing working out?
Do you see it going the distance?
Or do you not?
And in order to know that there are critical questions
that we've got to ask on the path of that relationship,
but it's really easy to avoid those questions isn't it?
It's really easy to say, "Ah, I'm gonna ask it later"
or "I'm not gonna ask it at all."
And so what is it that causes us
to not wanna ask those questions?
Well, it's the fear that if we ask the question,
it'll either, push the person away and drive them away
or we'll get the answer we don't want,
which is the rejection answer.
They don't see us as a longterm partner
or they don't have the same expectation that we do.
I was having a conversation with a client this week
and she had a beautiful mindset
that I wanted to share with you that was the outcome
of a situation that on the surface level
might look like it was painful or look bad,
but in the long run was ultimately what she said she wanted.
And this client was dating this guy
and they've been dating for quite a while
and then she decided to take my program to figure out,
how can I progress this relationship forward?
So she signs up for Manifest Your Man.
And throughout that course,
one of the questions that's key to ask along the way is,
where do you see this going?
Do you see this longterm?
Now they had been dating for months and months and months.
And this man is in the military
and so she finally conjured up the courage
to ask him that question.
And I'll share with you in a moment,
the mindset that she used to give herself the courage
to ask that question.
But she asked that question.
She says, "Where do you see this going?
"Do you see me as someone in your future?
"Do you see me as a potential lifelong partner?
"Not that you have to propose to me right away,
"but just, do you see us on the same path?"
And he came back to her and he said,
"You know, I love what we have now.
"And I love the interaction
"that we've been sharing with one another,
"but I really don't see you as a lifelong partner."
And part of her was shocked by that,
the part of her that was in denial,
the part of her that didn't wanna ask the question.
The part of her that was clinging onto
a false hope was like,
"Oh my gosh, I've been fooling myself all these months."
But there was another part of her
that knew that was probably gonna be the case
because she could sense it.
She was intuiting that,
and she was avoiding that question in the first place.
And then she shared with me.
So I was on the phone with her and she came,
she was gonna ask that question.
She got back on the line a couple of weeks later
after she had asked the question and she told us the story.
And she goes, "Matt, you know,
"he told me that he doesn't really see
"a longterm relationship with me, but let me tell you,
"I'm so grateful to get that information now,
"because I could have been with him for a year
"and he's content to just let the relationship
"be status quo.
"And that's not what I want.
"I want a partner in life.
"I wanna know I'm progressing towards something meaningful,
"towards a marriage."
And so here's the mindset that she shared.
And I wanna share it with you 'cause it's so powerful.
And she goes,
"I really believe that rejection is God's protection."
Rejection is God's protection.
So as she shared this idea with me, I began contemplating,
well, what is it exactly?
What is rejection exactly protecting us from?
And there are three ideas I wanna share with you
that it will help you drive this principle home,
really anchor it so that you can ask the tough questions
in the moments that you need to ask those questions.
The first idea that rejection protects you from
is it protects your time.
So you don't waste a whole bunch of time with the wrong guy.
The second idea is rejection actually protects your heart.
And now I know that's a strange idea,
and there's a part of you probably thinking,
"Well, Matt, rejection breaks my heart.
"How can it protect my heart?"
And here's the deal.
If you're with the wrong guy,
the breakup that occurs down the road
is way more painful than the breakup that's happening now.
The betrayal that happens down the road,
the feeling of that betrayal,
the feeling of that intense rejection or the lies,
or however that relationship doesn't work out
down the road with the wrong guy
will be worse years later than it is right now.
So essentially it's the smaller pain that you're feeling now
is protecting you from the greater pain that you feel later.
And the third idea that rejection protects us from,
and I love this one, this is my favorite,
rejection protects the future relationship
that you're gonna have with your man.
Think about this.
There's some amazing relationship that's in store for you,
some incredible guy that's out there right now,
looking for you and the two of you are gonna connect.
The rejection from the wrong guy,
actually protects that sacred, beautiful relationship
that you're gonna have with the right guy.
So when the fear of rejection starts to rise up in you,
cast it aside and say, "No, if I get rejected,
"that's not a thing to fear that's actually protecting me.
"It's protecting my time, protecting my heart,
"and protecting this amazing relationship
"that I will have with some guy someday soon."
And that's exactly what this client on this call
shared with me, that rejection is God's protection.
She goes, "You know what?
"I'm connecting to this great relationship
"that's about to come into my life.
"And I'm feeling really good about being set free
"from something that wasn't gonna go the distance."
So my question for you is,
what idea can you connect to rejection
that will empower you?
Post that in the comment section below
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one heart at a time.
I appreciate you.
Thanks for watching.
I'll see you soon.
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