[TWO PEOPLE SINGING ]
Oh, no wait.
No, wait.
I did not know that was that until now.
Hey guys.
Welcome to Comment Commentary.
I'm Joe Bereta.
I'm Lee Newton.
I'm Elliott Morgan.
Hey, and we're going to start this thing off hot.
Boom!
What you got, Lee?
Boom.
Look!
It's a poster.
[INAUDIBLE] took this photo and then now we're selling it.
See, this one says certain words,
but the ones that you guys pick up
are probably going to say different words because she's
going to personalize every single one with her handspot.
Yeah.
It has a conveniently placed cup right in front of my cleavage.
This is an actual candid photo.
It really is an actual candid photo.
If you look up here, there has been some photoshopping
done to the hair because nobody's hair's that perfect.
And if you zoom in on the eyes here,
you can see the porno that she's watching.
You can see the porno on that one,
but if you look closely into that one,
you can see an empty space where her soul used to be.
Yeah.
It's really good.
You should pick one up.
There will be a link in the description
and you should hang that up back there.
I will.
I'm going to hang it up right now.
Let's give her some hanging up music.
[TWO HOSTS SINGING]
Perfect.
Thanks, guys.
Hey, guys.
Here's our new Facebook banner.
Oh, look at that.
Jeez.
No, that's a really cool Facebook banner photo.
And if you're not in the Facebook banner photo,
if you're looking at that and you're like, wait a minute,
that's not me, well how about you hop on over to our Facebook
page, click the like button and submit your own photos.
I spilled coffee on my iPad.
And on the couch.
Also, we said we would give you a montage of photos from one
of the SourceFed videos that you submitted
that depict-- what was it?
Do you care about this?
Yeah, a lot.
Oh, damn.
Yeah, beautiful places.
Let us know-- well here's-- watch the thing.
[MUSIC PLAYING WITH PHOTO SLIDESHOW]
Couple lets Internet name their baby.
Say hello.
Excuse me.
Had a donut this morning.
You sounded like Colossus off the old X-Men video.
But what I was trying to say was that this couple
let the Internet name their baby.
They were taking suggestions from where?
Reddit.
And so it's a couple in Canada, and we asked you
guys, what do you think her name should be?
And also we wanted you to rename Joe and Lee.
Me.
Who was also in the video.
Zenkai76 said Megatron Salad has my vote.
I did love Megatron Salad.
That was one of my favorite ones.
If you guys don't know, they also
created a website called namemydaughter.com.
Yeah.
And they had the top 15 of first and middle names.
It was pretty great.
There was a little bit of transformer influence,
some Internet meme stuff, and Zelda was on there a lot.
I think the middle name is where you either give reverence
to other family members, or you just have a ball.
Yeah.
But not with me.
My parents were like Christopher.
And I was like, why?
And they were like, because we liked the sound of it.
Elliott Christopher Morgan?
It does sound like a writer.
That sounds like a writer.
That's how Walmart's
The new novel by Elliott Christopher Morgan.
Mine's Daniel.
And that's the same thing.
Just Daniel Bereta?
Why Daniel?
Your mom liked it.
It's the same with Elliott.
That's it.
I Always thought, is it because of ET?
And they are like, no, we just liked the way it sounded.
Which I think is a good reason to name--
Yeah, that is a really good reason.
It's the 21st century.
I don't think we need to continue the lineage--
That's how we named our kids.
We disagreed on everything for a long time, a very long time.
Really?
And then eventually we were both like, I like Hayden.
I like Hayden.
Fine.
The Freaky Fanatic said, mommy, why
is my name First Twerk YOLO?
TheKeeganFish says her first and middle name
should be Winter Ghostkeeper.
Oh, I love that.
That's pretty fun.
I would love that.
Winter works.
That sounds like a Game of Thrones.
McLaughlin's their last name, so Winter McLaughlin
is actually kind of beautiful.
That's beautiful, yeah.
Put the Ghostkeeper in, and it takes beauty and turns it
into awesome.
Joe's new nickname should either be a raspberry bereta
or beardeta, while Lee's could be lee-odactyl or Fig.
Oh, I had Fig.
Figgy was a nickname that I've had before.
Really?
Figgy?
They got that close to an actual nickname that you used to have?
Yeah, they got that.
Figgy, because of Newton.
Yeah, but like, the pudding too?
Yeah, like the pudding too.
That's great.
Yeah, I had Figgy as a nickname.
Fig Newton.
For like 12 seconds, and then I ate shit in front of a class.
Yeah, like physically ate feces.
Like sat at a table and ate shit in front of the class?
No, I walked up, and I remember walking up
to do a presentation, and then I slipped and I just ate it hard.
And they were like, Clumslee.
And then Clumslee stuck for a very long time.
Yeah, that sucks that any adverb basically
can be a nickname for you.
But you know what that means else can too?
Lovely.
Oh, did it hurt?
Did it hurt when said It?
Yeah.
Melissa Smith says Chalupa Batman.
Yeah.
Yeah, dude.
Southwest Baja for sure.
Would Tiffany ever let you name--
Say Baja.
Southwest.
Say Baja.
You know what happens?
I go to Mexican restaurants sometimes because I'm like,
I want some Mexican food, that sounds delicious.
And I go, and every time on the menu,
I'm like, where's the chalupas.
You know, because they're always like, fajitas, and tortillas.
And I'm always like, where's the chalupa?
And I did not realize until after I recently wikipedia'd
the chalupa that it was invented by Taco Bell.
I don't remember why.
Why did you wikipedia chalupa?
True story, and I don't know why I did it.
Erica Monroe says-- Jesus, that scared the--
--the shite out of me.
Roll that moment back.
Erica Monroe stated, I think Lee's nickname should
be Dino Baby and Joe's should be Mr. Gruff & Stuff.
The reason is Lee looked like a cute baby dinosaur in her dino
costume and Joe has a wicked gruffy beard.
Smiley face.
You know, guys.
You're going purely on appearances.
We also have personalities, all right?
I am similar to a dino baby, so that actually still fits.
OK.
And are you similar to a gruff?
You're not gruff.
Sometimes I get a little grumpy and gruff,
and then there's other stuff.
So I guess it does describe me.
There's the emotional heartfelt stuff,
so I guess you can leave that in, right?
TrigunTAS said Joe Burrito Bereta and Lee The Knee Newton.
Why The Knee?
I'm not on board with Joe Burrito Bereta,
but I am down with The Knee Newton.
I don't know why.
The Knee Newton.
When are you going bowling?
Are you excited about them ending prohibition?
I just want to vote.
That's all.
Yeah.
I'm sorry, I don't know when any of that stuff was.
I really want to land on the moon, so--
Yeah, well.
Maybe I'm just going to go build a pyramid.
Maybe we're going to burn these witches, OK?
Are you an Internet narcissist?
Description, researchers have discovered
that narcissists love Twitter.
Duh.
Question, do you think narcissism
is what drives Twitter, and what are the most
narcissistic tweets you've ever seen?
I saw this thing, it was-- because we're
YouTubers and YouTubers are a pretty narcissistic group
of people, because we have grown accustomed to talking
to a camera.
I think it's really quite sad and I
think narcissism is something that
plagues our entire generation as a result of the Internet
and these YouTube and Twitter is all just an offshoot of that.
The problem is that narcissism, beyond being inherently
selfish, can lead to other things like pride.
And then when you do that, when you're
looking at yourself constantly, you're seeking validation,
you don't help other people.
And then you end up--
Hey guys, buy my poster.
I'd look at it, but it's not me.
Somebody just tweeted at me and called me a narcissist.
It's so funny that we're covering this,
because I was going through and favoriting people
who had mentioned my name in tweets.
Perposterown said, I think 80% of Twitter
seems to be narcissistic.
I joined and have barely seen anything
really worthy of knowing for people
who aren't news and such.
Did you check out really bad shark jokes from Joe Bereta
yesterday?
Yeah, that was actually really solid.
Oh, they were so goo.
Twitter is my preferred social media,
not for me, but for comedy.
Eduardo Hinojosa said, I've found more narcissistic people
on Instagram than on Twitter.
I mean, photos are--
Photos are a rough one because it's
selfies like 9 times out of 10.
I think social media in general lends itself to narcissism,
because you're not going to-- it used to be you can find people
that you used to know in high school,
but we don't do that anymore.
Everybody's found each other.
We're all just living on the internet.
My least favorite Facebook everything
is when it's like, well I guess I'll never do that again.
The vague.
Oh, the passive aggressive.
I hate them.
There's a dog that follow, Tuna.
Tuna melts my heart.
A dog that you follow?
Every once in a while you can find a photographer
that does some cool stuff on it.
Yeah, you can.
And there's people that do crazy weird stuff on there too.
I love that.
There's also this really adorable little Down Syndrome
girl named Macy, and it's Macy Makes My Day,
and she's the cutest thing I've ever seen in the world,
and she makes me so happy.
She's probably not as cute as Pudgy the Corgy.
Well, synonymously cute.
Does that work as a word?
Nope.
I don't think so.
Patrickvane says, I'm not an Internet narcissist,
my comments are just better than everyone else's.
Oh, come on.
You're just an Internet Dick.
Mr_Spring_Roll, don't really care to comment,
I just love the username.
I love all the tweets about people complaining
that they didn't get a new car, or a new iPhone,
or something like that on Christmas.
I do like that.
Especially those who complain that they didn't
get the right color on their iPhone.
Yeah, that's great.
Giggle fit, I've ever seen.
I want to end with this insightful one.
Valherovlog says, Beaker from the Muppets
is easily the most narcissistic asshole out there.
It's always, me me me me.
Me me me.
Yeah, we'll go with that one.
And cut.
Man eats landlord's heart over chess game.
Description, the guy loves chess, so back off.
He admitted to killing his landlord
in a very gruesome manner over an even gruesomer game
of chess.
Question, what's the craziest thing
you've ever done over a game.
Oh, shiz.
Gotten emotionally invested in any of them.
I don't do that anymore.
I'm pretty detached.
I bet you're lying.
I bet you if we played monopoly right now, you'd go nuts.
Yeah, thats what I was just going to say.
Monopoloy, you'd lose your mind.
Monopoly is the one.
The one.
Yeah.
It's the worst board game, right?
Look out.
Arran Fletcher said, I straight up murdered someone over Uno.
[BLEEP] you and your +4.
I play Uno with Hayden, my daughter,
and she gets like that.
She'll be like, mmhm.
I'm like what are you mmhm'ing about?
And she'll go-- and she'll put down the +4.
And then she'll go, [BLEEP] you.
And you say?
What do you do?
You say, watch that tongue?
I say, that's fair.
That's fair.
This is how you should do Uno.
Thank you for taking my teachings.
You don't say, like, no.
No, I mean, she used the term-- here, look.
Well she is using it right.
It's not that she swore.
She's using the term in a very good way.
It's a little antagonizing, yes, I will admit that.
But it's an appropriate moment to use the +4 F you.
But in all fairness, remember when we were at Magic Mountain,
she punched Elliott in the groin and said [BLEEP] you.
Yeah.
Again, that's a really good way to do it.
Yeah, it's OK to do it there.
OK.
So my thing-- if I had done that when I was a kid, like I'm
imagining it, because it's funny to think about.
I think I'd be dead.
I think I would have died.
My mother would have--
If it actually for real had fallen out of Hayden's mouth--
--made me eat soap.
You would just lose your mind.
I would have been spanked to death.
Would not have a butt anymore.
I don't have a butt, but I would have had no butt.
Yeah.
It's such a so out there moment in reality,
that if it really fell out of Hayden's mouth--
Would you just be shocked?
--I would go like this.
I would go like this.
She would be so cute, she'd be like [BLEEP] you.
I'd go--
You're kicked out.
--don't move.
Then I would go, Heather!
Then I'd go find Heather and then we would shut the door,
and I would be like, I don't know what to do right now.
She just said-- she laid down a +4 card.
We were playing Uno and she laid down a +4 card and she said
[BLEEP] you.
What?
She said what?
She said [BLEEP] you.
She didn't hear it from me.
Heather would be like, oh, a +4 card?
Wait no, she probably heard it from me.
I make a lot of Internet videos and I
let her watch all of them.
This is my fault.
Do you want a divorce?
Mmhm.
OK, it's been real.
I'm going to take you for everything you're worth.
Juglinggeeseisacrime says, I was playing risk with my friends
and it was lasting a long time.
I didn't want them to skip my go because I had something
big planned, so I ended up peeing whilst
sat making my next move.
No, no.
They still don't know to this day.
God, I hope that's real.
I hope that's so real.
Just wanted to pee to play Risk.
Connor Ferrante said, I did a naked lap
after the Chargers made the playoffs this year.
Oh, OK.
All right.
How big was the lap, though?
Yeah, that [INAUDIBLE].
Like, did you go to a local track?
Were you on a full mile track?
You can't run.
A naked run is really hard to do, no matter who you are.
That's just a fact.
Doug Dennon said I sucker punched my best friend
for knocking me back in a game of Trouble.
Consequently, he did the same thing
when I knocked him back later, thus hardcore trouble was born.
Hardcore Trouble.
Oh, I'm glad there's someone out there playing Trouble.
I don't think that's a game people play anymore,
but they do.
[INAUDIBLE] commercials.
What are you guys doing?
Getting into Trouble.
Trouble.
It's like a single mother is like, in that commercial,
is like, what are you doing?
No, you tell me right now.
Mom, it's just trouble.
We're getting into Trouble.
No, we're not doing this again.
We're not doing this again.
Are you starting more fires?
What is it?
You're not painting anything?
Are you painting something?
I'm not bailing you out this time.
Are you eating everything again?
No.
Hey, guys.
Thanks for watching Comment Commentary.
It's been real.
It really has.
Bye, Elliott.
I'm coming back.
Oh, he's going to go do something.
Oh, he's coming back.
Oh yeah, bring that thing up.
Bring that thing forward.
Oh, look at that.
Hey, OK.
So this weekend, we got some fun stuff.
Yeah, yeah we have a lot of fun stuff.
You need to pay attention.
As always, we're going to have Elliott's insightful smut
fest, that is ultimate pop culture.
We'll also have some bloopers.
And then over on Nerve we've got a really special table
talk going on.
Steve and I sat with Robb Stark, Richard Madden.
Robb Stark.
And it's a really good table talk.
I feel like Game of Thrones thing that we do
is going to be just George RR [INAUDIBLE] Martin.
Spoiler-- he doesn't make an appearance.
It's the actual-- it's the actual guy.
But he's charismatic.
He's all good looking, and stuff.
And we're going to get married.
Yeah.
So there.
And then, what else.
Is that it?
Down in the description we've got a PO Box,
you can look at that.
For [INAUDIBLE] peoples, if you like,
the back of Mac computers, right here.
There you go.
Yeah.
Yeah, go pick it up.
It's a PhillyD original.
This frame is not--
It's a little slice of life that you can put on your wall.
Yay.
Right next to the Joe Bereta lumberjack poster.
And the Elliott Morgan poster that you have.
Thank you, Lee.
You should definitely do that.
Yay.
I guess we're going to go.
We're going to start some music right now.
And just do a little-- pick that up and slow zoom to the camera
until it goes to black.
OK, yeah.
OK.
Get some music going.
Oh, Kiss from a Rose?
Nice.
I [BLEEP] hate that poster.
It's the worst.
Dude, and the way she constantly pimps it out
is just embarrassing.
Do you feel like she never shut up
about it, like the whole time?
No.
No, hey.