Let's go to the beach. Okay? You want to go? Let's go. Let's go. In Canada, it's almost
summertime. Almost. So this means that we can go and drink beer outside. We do it in
the winter, too. We just get really cold. So usually, maybe, sometimes, hopefully, at some
point in our Canadian climate, it's warm enough to go to the beach. I live in Toronto, and
we have many beaches -- not "bitches" -- beaches in Toronto. You can actually go there, relax.
Swimming is up to you. If you'd like to have an extra arm or lose an arm, you can go in
the water. Lake Ontario, beautiful place, by the way. Today, the lesson is at the beach.
Now, a lot of people have problems saying this word "beach" because it sounds like "bitch".
So to help you, what you're going to do is you're going to say "beach". So even -- I
could just do this and take out the "a" -- oh, I'm so sneaky -- and make it sound like "beach",
but you have to draw out the "e" sound. You'll say "beach". The bad word that might come
out of your mouth is "bitch". This is a much shorter word. So this is a very, very long
"e" sound. You can smile. "Beach". You're happy because you're going to the beach. The
bad word is "bitch". It's one syllable, and you can think of it as being angry. It sounds
exactly as the word "itch", which means you have to scratch, so it's "bitch". So try "bitch",
"beach". Now that we've got that, we're going to go through some vocabulary and pronunciation
and some slang that you would use when you were at the beach.
The first one, we're going to talk about our clothes. It's hot at the beach, so you don't
want to wear a lot of clothes. People would wear a T-shirt, and the pronunciation of this
word is just like the letter "T", and it sounds like "shirt". It's actually pronounced like
an "er" sound, so we say "T-shirt". The next word is always something that we have to say
in the plural. It is something we always have to say in the plural, and it is "shorts". We
do not say "short pants". Short pants are strange, so we just say "shorts".
Another thing you can have mostly for the ladies are "short shorts". How crazy. "Short
shorts" are very, very, as you can imagine, small shorts. "Who wears short shorts? The
camera lady wears short shorts. Oh, yeah!"
Then, popular with men and women alike, is a "tank top". I don't know why it's called
a "tank top". It's got nothing to do with a tank, but it definitely is a top. So a tank
top basically has no sleeves. These are called "sleeves". So you might say a "sleeveless
shirt", or the proper word is "tank top". Now, of course, this spelling is wrong, so
be careful for the pronunciation. It's "beach", but the spelling must be an "a". A tank top
is this thing.
Now, for men, we have words to describe what you wear on the bottoms when you go swimming.
It's not recommended that you wear nothing because a fish might come and nibble you.
For both men and women, we use the word in North America "bathing suit" or "swimsuit".
They're the same. I always laugh because in the UK, people will say "swimming costume".
When I think of a "costume", I think of something for Halloween, like I'm going to dress up
like a ghost or a witch. So in the UK, when they say "swimming costume", I go, "What?
Are you going to be a horse? You're going to be a horse to the beach? You need some
beach horse stuff?" So North America "bathing suit". In the UK, they say -- I forget what
they say. They don't say "horse", do they? "Swimming costume". And in North America,
"costume" implies that you're going to change who you are, change your appearance, wear
a mask, like at Halloween. So "bathing suit" or "swimsuit" works for both men and women.
This is a very wonderful picture that I drew of a women's bathing suit or swimsuit. Good
picture.
Next, we have the ever-popular "bikini". I think this is pretty much a universal word,
"bikini". "Bikini", you can have two pieces. Sometimes, people call this a "one piece"
when you're talking about a bathing suit. Our camera lady right now is driving a massive
Corvette that just went by. Our camera lady right now is wearing a "bikini". It is a very
small string bikini. After our lesson, she may go "topless". "Topless" means there's
no top. So in a lot of "beaches" -- not "bitches" -- in a lot of "beaches", you might see "topless"
women. "Topless" men? Yeah, okay. You might see them, too. We have a slang word for those
guys. If a man has "breasts" or we say "boobs" that are quite big, like a woman, we call
them "man boobs". It's not attractive at all. I don't want to see boobs on a man. I don't
want to see boobs on a woman, really. Especially not on a man. So let's draw some man boobs
on this guy. "Man boobs". Now, to even make this funnier, we say "moobs" because we put
the words together -- "man" and "boobs" -- "moobs". So you can say, "Hey, buddy. Nice moobs. Do
you need a bra?" Maybe you should get a bra. A bra is a bikini top.
Another slang word we have for men only are "dink suit". A "dink suit"? What's a "dink
suit"? "Dink, dink, dink." What's a "dink"? A "dink" is the boy part -- the penis, if
you will. A "dink suit" is known by its name brand of "speedos". Speedos are very, very
small, tiny little pants that the men wear at the beach. I don't know why, but they're
very, very popular in Europe. When I have been to Europe -- when I went to Europe or
if I'm at the beach in Toronto, I know who's from Europe because they're wearing their
speedos or in slang, their "dink suits". "Banana hammock" could be another word you'd like
to use here. So men, you generally have two styles. You can wear a speedo or you can wear
longer shorts that we call "swimming trunks" or "swim shorts" or "swimming shorts".
So the next time you go to the beach, make sure you've got your sunglasses. Laugh at
all the people with man-boobs, and have a good time. Bye.
When it's really sunny at the beach, you need to wear sunglasses. I hear a lot of people
saying "sun-glass". "Sun-glass" would imply that there's one, so you'd be walking around
like this. If you are a pirate, you would wear sunglasses. If you're not a pirate, you
need to wear "sun-glass-is". The pronunciation of this word is difficult because you have
to add an extra syllable at the end. So singular is "sun-glass", but in pronunciation, every
time you say this word, you have to say "sun-glass-is". You can say "I-zed" or "I-s-is". "Sun-glass-is".
"Sun-glass" is not even a word in English.
The other thing that's very important is the word "bitch". Who knows what that means? I
told you it was a bad word. It has two meanings. The first meaning is it means a female dog.
That's okay. The second meaning of the word "bitch" means a woman who is not very nice
or who is very mean. So you can say, "You're a bitch. I hate you." The third meaning of
the word "bitch" we can use for men. Can you do that? Yes. You say, "Don't be a bitch."
Meaning, "Don't be a whiny little baby and do this. Don't be a bitch and go and run across
the street naked." So we have three meanings for the word.
If you look in the dictionary, it might say "a female dog". And you wonder why people
get angry when you say at the park, "Hey, I like your bitch. It's really cute." So we
don't say the word "bitch" anymore to mean a female dog. We only use it for a negative
woman or man, someone we don't like. See you later, alligator.