• From a rejection that caused an asthma attack to public declarations of love gone
wrong, the Planet Dolan crew re-enact some of the best true stories from our subreddit
about the worst ways we’ve been rejected.
I’m Nixxiom – and today I’ll be your narrator.
Number 10 was submitted by lipstickgigglegiggle Snewpee
At school Snewpee had a big crush on this guy named Simon.
Her best friend really wanted Snewpee to tell Simon she felt – and one day she finally
convinced her!
Snewpee then asked him out on a date but he politely told her that he wasn’t interested.
The next day at school Snewpee was horrified to see Simon and her best friend kissing.
It turned out that her friend had violated the best friend code by asking Simon out right
after he’d rejected Snewpee!
Snewpee was devastated.
She had to spend the next few years watching her crush and her former best friend be an
annoyingly cute couple.
Number 9 was submitted by Light_yay Slapped Ham
Slapped Ham had a major crush on the new girl at school.
They had a lot in common and were pretty good friends.
But after months of secretly pining for her Slapped Ham decided he had to tell her how
he felt.
Slapped Ham confessed his feelings while the girl just stared.
She knew he loved Pokémon, so she laughed and said, “Boy, you better make like a Zubat
and stop annoying the hell out of me!”
To top it off, she sprayed him with her perfume, knowing full well that this would trigger
Slapped Ham’s asthma.
She jokingly called her perfume attack a ‘max repel’ and laughed when Slapped Ham fell
to the ground coughing.
Hmm…
I think he dodged a bullet with that one…
Number 8 was submitted by slammin_pumpkin_soup Melissa
The first time Melissa asked a guy out she was super nervous.
But it turns out she had nothing to worry about because it actually went really well!
He said yes and they excitedly made plans to go on a date together.
That night, Melissa got all dressed up and went to the place where they’d arranged
to meet.
But when she got there her date was nowhere to be found!
Melissa realised she’d been stood up.
Apparently the guy had no intention of coming on the date.
But he was too shy to tell her this, so he just agreed to the date and then chickened
out.
What a dick.
Number 7 was submitted by heartburn23 Zaraganba In junior high Zaraganba was crushing pretty
hard on a girl in his class.
For weeks he’d stare lovingly at her from the back of the class, admiring her long blonde
hair.
He didn’t have the nerve to go up and talk to her, but one day he decided enough was
enough!
He wrote her this epic letter where he declared his feelings for her.
I arranged to sit next to her in class and then SOMEHOW found the courage to pass her
the note.
He watched her unfold the letter, glance at it, then…
crumple it up with disgust.
Poor Zaraganba.
She may as well have scrunched up his heart.
Number 6 was submitted by Lousanthegamer Pringle When Pringle younger he was in love with the
most popular girl in school.
Trouble was this girl had a reputation for being really mean.
But on Valentine’s Day Pringle went to a ton of effort and bought her the most expensive
roses, chocolates and card he could afford.
The next day Pringle’s crush came right up to him with a huge smile on her face.
She looked at him and said, “Hey, guess what?
I know who I love…”
Pringle got really excited and was like, ‘Yessss!
She’s gonna say me!’
But instead, out of nowhere, she kicked Pringle in the crotch and said, “I love your disappointed
face!”
It hurt Pringle in more ways than one, but the joke’s on her because after graduation
she ended up fat, ugly and alone.
Number 5 was submitted by CheeseontheChicken Shima
When Shima was in eighth grade she was head-over-heels in love with a guy she’d never even spoken
to.
After months of obsessing, she finally found the courage to go up to him and admit her
feelings.
Shima stared at him as she blurted out the words as quickly as possible.
At that moment, another girl walked over and gave Shima’s crush a huge kiss on the cheek.
She looked at Shima and said, “Who’s this bitch?”
Shima’s crush coldly replied, “I don’t know.
Some random wannabe.”
Shima was so heartbroken that she stayed the hell away from boys and put all her energy
into her studies.
I guess that’s how she got so smart.
Number 4 was submitted by Ninjaisligit LadyBot In eighth grade LadyBot had a crush on a cute
guy who’d just broke up with his girlfriend.
Valentine’s Day was coming up so LadyBot knew this was her chance to win him over.
She went into his locker and left a rose, a love poem and a note telling him to meet
her at the bleachers at four o’clock.
All day LadyBot waited for four o’clock to come around.
When it came time, she raced to the bleachers but couldn’t find her crush anywhere!
Instead she found a note taped to the highest seat.
In her crush’s handwriting, it said: ‘Public bathrooms down the street just got a new roll
of toilet paper.
Maybe that will help you dry your tears’.
Ouch.
Number 3 was submitted by GuntherzChoice GhostToast In high school GhostToast was extremely shy
and had no self-confidence.
Whenever he tried talking to girls he would get tongue-tied and make a complete fool of
himself.
His friend told him he would become more confident if he got out of his comfort zone and did
something unexpected.
So later on at the mall, GhostToast was thinking about this advice when he spotted the most
beautiful girl he’d ever seen.
He gave himself a quick pep talk then walked right up to her to say hi.
But before GhostToast could get a word out, the girl of his dreams looked at him and said,
“Ew!
Fuck off, you creep!”
GhostToast felt his self-esteem shatter into a thousand pieces.
It took months for him to recover from this savage blow…
Number 2 was submitted by Molis14 Grgak When Grgak was a freshman he had a big crush
on a girl named Julia.
Grgak wanted to take her to homecoming so he came up with a plan to ask her in history
class.
First he emailed his history teacher to get permission, then he set to work making a big
sign that said: ‘Will you make history and go to homecoming with me?’
The next day Grgak sat next to Julia in history class.
He waited for the right moment then showed her his sign.
Julia was shocked.
With the whole class watching them, she awkwardly said, “Sorry, but I’m already going with
someone else…”
The whole class laughed at Grgak and started sending tweets about it.
Pretty soon everyone in Grgak’s grade knew about his epic failure.
Grgak even catches the same train home as Julia so there’s just no escaping the awkwardness.
Number 1 – What’s the worst way I’ve been rejected?
Okay, so…
Technically I’ve never been rejected before, because I mean – come on!
– look at me.
I’m a proud stallion of testosterone!
But there was this one time where this pink cat sprayed me with a water bottle after showing
her my abs…
And then this mermaid girl kicked sand in my face when I tried to get with her…
And then there was this robot woman who told me to go screw myself…
Huh…
And then there was- Okay, those just didn’t count, okay?
I wasn’t even trying!
Huge thanks for the folks over on our Planet Dolan subreddit for submitting their stories.
We have another question for you: “What’s the dumbest thing you’ve seen people fight
over?”
Let us know in the Reddit page linked below and you might be featured in a future countdown.