WELCOME BACK UEVERYBODY.
I DON'T KNOW ABOUT YOU, BUT FOR ME, IT CAN BE HARD TO WATCH THE
NEWS THESE DAYS SINCE IT'S SO FILLED WITH ALL THE...
THINGS THAT HAPPENED.
WHICH IS WHY I WAS SO EXCITED TO MEET SOMEONE WHO HAS REMAINED
BLISSFULLY UNINFORMED ABOUT CURRENT EVENTS.
HER NAME IS BOOTSIE PLUNKETT, AND SHE SERVED AS OUR
"UNINFORMED CORRESPONDENT" DURING THE MIDTERMS.
SHE ALSO HAPPENS TO BE THE MOTHER OF MY FIELD PRODUCER,
JAKE PLUNKETT.
COME ON OUT HIRE JAKE.
GIVE IT UP FOR JAKE, EVERYBODY.
( APPLAUSE )
JAKE, THANKS FOR BEING HERE.
>> THANK YOU.
>> Stephen: THU.
AND IS THIS A SURPRISE TO YOU THEY CALLED YOU OUT HERE?
>> A LITTLE BIT, YUP.
>> Stephen: OKAY, THAT EXPLAINS THE OUTFIT.
( LAUGHTER )
WAS GOING TO CALL YOU OUT HERE.
>> YI DID.
>> Stephen: WHY DID YOU JUST LIE TO ME?
>> SORRY.
>> Stephen: JAKE...
( LAUGHTER )
WEARING A HAT RIGHT NOW?
WHAT'S GOING ON UNDER THERE?
COME ON.
>> DO YOU WANT ME TO TAKE IT OFF?
>> Stephen: WE CAN EDIT IT OUT IF IT'S TOO HORRIFYING?
( LAUGHTER ).
>> PUT IT ON.
>> Stephen: PUT IT BACK ON.
PUT IT BACK ON.
PEOPLE MIGHT BE EATING.
NOW.
YOU KNOW I LOVE YOU.
>> YEAH, I LOVE YOU.
>> >> Stephen: NOW HOW LONG HAVE
YOU KNOWN YOUR MOM?
>> MY WHOLE LIFE.
>> Stephen: IS IT FAIR TO SAY SHE'S UNINFORMED ABOUT A LOT OF
THINGS?
>> I WOULD SAY THAT'S PRETTY FAIR, YES.
>> Stephen: SHE'S COVERED POLITICS AND ESPIONAGE FOR US.
>> THAT'S RIGHT.
>> Stephen: I UNDERSTAND THESE SHOOEZ EQUALLY UNINFORMED ABOUT
SOME CULTURAL THINGS THAT ARE VERY IMPORTANT TO ME LIKE "LORD
OF THE RINGS," SCIENCE FICTION, "STAR WARS" OR SUPER HEROES,
STUFF LIKE THAT.
>> ALL OF IT.
>> Stephen: THAT'S WHY-- AND THAT'S REFRESHING-- AND THAT'S
WHY I SENT JAKE AND HIS MOTHER TO NEW YORK COMIC-CON SO SHE
COULD BECOME MORE INFORMED.
JIM.
>> IFIMENTED MY MOM, BOOTSIE, TO LEARN ABOUT SUPER HEROES AND
SCIENCE FICTION THERE WAS ONLY ONE PLACE TO GO-- COMIC-CON IN
NEW YORK CITY.
FIRST, I HAD TO SEE HOW MUCH SHE ACTUALLY KNEW ABOUT NERD
CULTURE.
SO WHAT DO YOU BEEN "LORD OF THE RINGS"?
>> I KNOW THAT DAD NAMED YOU JAKE, ROAN, AND REILLY FOR
J.R.R. TOLKIEN.
AND I KNOW HIS PASSCODE IS-- >> NO, NO, NO.
>> BUT IT'S BIRTHDAYS.
>> BUT YOU CAN'T GIVE OUT PEOPLE'S PASSWORDS.
TELL ME MORE ABOUT "LORD OF THE RINGS."
BECAUSE THIS IS STEPHEN'S FAVORITE SHING.
>> SCHMIEGEL.
>> WHAT DOES HE DO?
WHAT?
>> I DON'T KNOW, HE TALKS WEIRD.
>> WHAT'S HIS CATCH PHRASE.
>> COME HERE!
I DON'T KNOW!
WHAT IS IT!
>> I LOVE THAT YOU THINK SCHMIEGEL IS JUST WALKING AROUND
GOING, "COME HERE."
WHO IS YOUR FAVORITE HOBBIT?
>> SNIFFLY?
IS IT LIKE SNUFFY, SNIFFLY.
>> IT'S FRODO BAGON.
>> IT'S NOT BILL BOBBINS?
( SIGHS ) I WISH I KNEW (BLEEP).
>> DO YOU LIKE BATMAN?
>> YEAH, I LIKE BATMAN AND ROBIN.
>> YOU DO?
>> I LOVE THEM!
>> WHO WERE THEIR VILLAINS.
>> THE JOKER.
>> THAT'S RIGHT!
>> YEAH!
>> YOU KNOW WHAT THE JOKER SAID?
>> YIPPEE KAI-AI.
>> THAT'S RIGHT.
YOU KNOW ABOUT COSPLAYING?
>> PEOPLE DRESSED AS PAC-MAN.
>> I MEAN THEY COULD BE DRESSED AS PAC-MAN.
>> BECAUSE THEY'RE COSPLAYING, RIGHT, LIKE THEY'RE BUMPING INTO
EACH OTHER.
>> COSPLAYING IS LIKE PEOPLE WHO DRESS UP IN COSTUMES AND, LIKE,
ROLE PLAY.
>> THOSE ANIMAL FURRY PEOPLE.
>> NO, NOT FURRY, HOLY (BLEEP).
>> I THINK THEY HAVE SEX WITH THEIR FUR SHOES ON.
YOU KNOW, WHEN I GOT UP THIS MORNING, I WAS VERY SICK TO MY
STOMACH BECAUSE YOU TOLD ME I HAD TO DRESS UP AS CHEWBACCA ON
A STAGE IN FRONT OF 250,000 PEOPLE.
>> I WOULD NEVER DO THAT TO YOU.
>> AND SAY AARRRRRR.
>> MY MOM HIT THE COMIC-CON FLOOR--
>> I FOUND YOU!
>> ...AND DOVE RIGHT IN.
>> WHAT SHOW ARE YOU FROM?
>> "STRAR WARS."
>> OH, THIS IS WHAT I GOTTA LEARN BECAUSE, YOU KNOW, MY BOSS
AND FRIEND, STEPHEN COLBERT, HE LIKES THAT.
AND I WANT TO GET TO KNOW THIS STUFF.
>> OKAY.
>> YOU KNOW?
ARE YOU FROM "STAR WARS?" >> I CERTAINLY AM.
>> WOW.
MY BOSS, STEPHEN, LOVES "STAR WARS."
>> THE RESISTANCE OR THE WHAT?
>> OR THE FIRST ORDER.
>> OR THE FIRST ORDER?
I THINK HE LIKES BOTH.
THE PEE PEEPOSITIVE TAPE.
HI!
DID YOU MAKE THAT OUTFIT?
>> I DID NOT.
MY FRIENDS FOR THE LAST, LIKE, COUPLE OF YEARS WOULD JUST BE
LIKE, "I'M JUST GOING TO GET A COSTUME AND SEE WHAT HAPPENS.
>> AND PRETEND.
YOU KNOW WHAT THEY SAY I LOOK LIKE?
>> WHO.
>> RED FROM "ORANGE IS THE NEW BLACK."
YEAH, YOU THINK SO?
SAY SOMETHING!
BY LAUREN!
YIPPEE KI A.
( LAUGHTER )
YOU SAID THE JOKER SAYS YIPPEE KI YAY.
(BLEEP).
WHY WERE THEY LAUGHING.
>> THAT'S NOT WHAT HE SAYS!
>> MY MOM WAS NOW SLIGHTLY MORE INFORMED.
>> OH, YEAH, LIKE THAT, BABY.
>> YEAH, BABY, YEAH.
>> BUT I WANTED HER TO HAVE THE FULL NERD EXPERIENCE.
SO MARVEL COMICS CHIEF CREATIVE OFFICER JOE CASADDA AGREED TO
HELP HER DEVELOP HER OWN SUPER HERO CHARACTER.
>> SO GIVE ME SOME IDEAS BECAUSE I HAVE NO IDEA.
>> IF YOU EVER HAD A SUPER HERO POWER WHAT WOULD IT BE?
>>IMENT TO BE A BIRD.
>> A BIRD.
>> AND FLY.
>> SO YOU WANT TO HAVE WINGS.
>> YEAH, I WANT TO FLY.
>> YOU WANT A TIGHT SPANDEX SUIT OR SOMETHING MORE LOOSE FITTING?
>> LOOSE, BECAUSE I HAVE A HERNIA.
>> WE GOT TO GET YOU OFF YOUR FEET.
>> WHAT ARE YOUR WEAKNESSES?
>> MY WEAKNESSES, I'M A DIABETIC AND I LOVE SUGAR.
>> WOW, THAT'S YOUR KRYPTONITE, SUGAR.
>> MY MOM WAS EXCITED TO BECOME BOOTSIE BIRD, WHICH ALMOST MADE
ME FEEL BAD ABOUT LYING TO HER ABOUT THE CHEWBACCA OUTFIT.
>> JAKE, YOU (BLEEP).
I'M DONE.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ).
>> Stephen: THANK YOU, JAKE.
THANK YOU FOR SHARING YOUR LOVELY MOTHER WITH US.
AND, JAKE, I'M EXCITED TO ANNOUNCE WE HERE AT THE LATE
SHOW HAS AN ARTIST'S RINDERING OF YOUR MOM AS A SUPER HERO
NAMED BOOTSIE BIRD.
AND EVEN MORE EXCITING, JAKE, WE HAVE FOR THE FIRST TIME
ANYWHERE, THE ACTUAL BOOTSIE BIRD.
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, PLEASE WELCOME BOOTSIE BIRD!
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
>> Stephen: BOOTSIE PLUNKETT, EVERYBODY!
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK!