I'm retiring finally
Why?
I've always said
and anybody who's worked with me in restaurants and kitchens has always heard me rant
that i would leave when i was 50.
And I worked for a lot of guys in my career
that should have left when they were 50.
I've seen a few guys maybe die in their kitchens of heart attacks
or just work until they were completely kind of irrelevant
some sad ends in the restaurant business sometimes.
I always had this image that i would leave when i was 50.
People think "oh, cooking!" I
You know what cooking is?
it's like it's five percent cooking
95 per cent cleaning.
To be able to make dinner for 50 people
it'll take you four hours
and 12 hours to clean up.
There's no glamour!
I just became angry
I was angry at the door,
angry at the stairs,
angry at the refrigeration technician,
angry at the air conditioning,
angry at the heating system,
angry at the door lock, at the alarm system
angry at the young chefs,
angry at the older chefs,
angry at the dishwasher machine,
angry at the price of meat,
angry at the price of vegetables.
Ultimately I just became disillusioned, angry, tired
and perhaps at the end I got a little bit snappy
I might have snapped on a couple of people that i shouldn't have
just because
just in a dark, angry place
When I woke up in the morning, I didn't relish coming to work
Ad i'm lucky because 99% of my career
I woke up and couldn't wait to get to work
and many people can't say that.
I can say that.
I've had a beautiful career in Montreal.
The people that i've cooked for,
the restaurants that i've worked in.
I've seen these amazing beautiful years.
All the relationships that i've made: the good the bad, even.
The people i've fought with.
The controversy.
The great successes.
The traveling.
The restaurants I've eaten in, the wines i've drank.
The friends that i have all through the city.
I've had a terrific career.
But I really started hitting a wall.
I'm 50.
Coming out of the pandemic,
either I really tie my boots on, pull up my pants and get to work
and give it another 10 years
but I'd wake up in the middle of the night with cold sweats
thinking that I still had to walk the dining room
and shake hands and make sure that the walk-in fridge was clean
just constant worry about the door being locked
or whenever i see a Hydro-Québec vehicle in the front of the restaurant
I think automatically that we have to close
and there's a lot of of complex, multi-trigger PTSD
It's a difficult job.
Because i've been thinking a lot about my career over the last three weeks,
I'm realizing there's been a hell of a lot of suicides,
quite a bit of drug overdoses,
lots of drug abuse, alcoholism and things like that.
So I'm happy to be at 50.
I'm pretty damaged but health-wise I'm good.
When we lost Anthony Bourdain
don't forget we lost John Bil from cancer right around the same period.
So the fun never stops coming in the restaurant business
Don't forget, we're not working 35 hours
or 44 hours a week here.
I'm 50 but there were 80 hour weeks
if not 100 hours a week for 25 years or 20 years.
So freedom 55, I should have retired really when i was 42 years old maybe.
You know what I fantasize about?
To be honest you know what I want to do?
I want to work at at Home Depot
Fred knows this. We've talked about it for years.
I would like to work as an orderly in the emergency room of the Lakeshore General Hospital.
I would like to work at Home Depot in the tool section or the wood section or Réno-Dépôt.
I just want a boss, a shift i'm going to work three days a week
at Réno-Dépôt on the West Island.
Just tell me where to stand, what to do.
I know all about tools and wood. I would love to help.
I'll work at Lakeshore General for free
because I need structure and i need not to be the boss.