yo bro your nose is sweaty man I'm
sweating right now hey what's going on
everybody for first we feast I'm Sean
Evans and you're watching hot ones it's
the show with hot questions and even
hotter wings and today we're joined by
the bodega boys Jesus nice and the kid
you can catch them on Showtime's new
late-night series DS ass and marrow
which premieres tonight actually
February 21st at 11 p.m.
guys welcome to the show this is it's
been too long
way too long people have been waiting to
the fans so we're glad we could do it
for the community for the people this is
like 1s view does the crossover look
like Chicago PD right my thieves in one
spot well before we begin Mara I think
it we should point out that you
requested oke milk is that the Alpine
New Jersey influence ever used to watch
our oats or complexes i Wow Wow nothing
don't like so Tom that's what they're
always picking a little bit of a
curveball yo you know what it is is I'm
wildly lactose intolerant and in order
for now so for me to not pee out my ass
on say cuz yeah I wouldn't like that you
know I'm also wildly lactose are you see
while acting
[Music]
okay and the hair are you right
you got flats to you smart guy mm-hmm
[Music]
little chrome to the Cromwell kick
mm-hmm so I wanna start by taking it
back to that dump hole studio on 50th
Street we're not only DS s and Merrill
began but also hot ones and I think it's
important to shout out Donnie Kwok
Johnny called a dog person the only
person to respond to our pitch email
what role did he play and bringing you
guys together the same pitch email like
we at the time you know we were just two
guys from the Bronx twittering as the
kids Artie and every time that our
tweets were interact people were just
like yo there's like a natural chemistry
you got to talk about the same thing in
Donny crock cuz he's a genius was like
no we're gonna do a podcast with you
guys and from the air here we go
this remember the first time that Joe
liPuma hooked you up with free kicks
yeah I felt like it was a strong move
now I feel bad because I feel like I
strong-armed them and I walk that I was
like damn yodels great beats are hard my
[ __ ] can I have him he's just like he's
like yeah yeah yeah he's like sure here
those two people
Joe was like I love you I'd love to keep
it going he's a good boy he also has the
tightest pants in the world a favorite
rich in to know of memory did he ever
take you to Joe we had before we did a
live Jesus of marriage these versus
marrow for marketing as a marketing like
some [ __ ] from a sales meeting on 9/11
first of all who schedules a meeting on
9/11 so we open with that and before we
even go on we're like in the bathroom
you know a little nervous whatever and
Rich's day with his dick out at the
urinal he's like guys do great guys are
doing great
killing it you guys gonna flame me so
great you guys gonna flame me I [ __ ]
love it so we get out there were like
yeah we're just talking to rich with his
dick I love rich rich yeah literally use
rich
hippie-dippie red/green hi look I'm just
saying the boss this is a little more
spicier so you guys been pretty open
about the early podcast being a little
bit more cathartic a little bit more
rage fueled than the stuff that you guys
do now definitely when you think back on
the awkward faces the face that you've
had with people that you roasted in the
past is there a story that stands out
most people of good sports like
surprisingly like most people and we've
roasted they come on and they're like yo
you got me um Terry Crews yeah he was
saying he was a dick to the master we
found a video clip where he was like
building his own home computer and I was
like yo fam investigation maybe don't
need that solid state drives oh yeah
three seconds before that quick time
loads maybe that saves you Barry buddy
the whole time were just like you know
just no district every like you know
you're a lot bigger than us and he came
over he was like yo that was funny don't
worry I'll crush you with one arm well
so did he he was great during the
interview and at one point like he
leaned over was like I'll be watching
out okay also video doesn't give a [ __ ]
about anything cuz he came on and it was
like we're on another network he's like
hey [ __ ] don't work out here yeah yeah
always come to revolt I was like family
he looks trip together he's like yeah
always kind of revolt you know say with
a black people that you know I'm saying
if you don't got to work for the man I
was like oh it shows like oh [ __ ]
garlic grape fruit onions carrots okay
Williamsburg foodie go calling it a
Williamsburg bodega is actually rather
poetic segue because a few years ago you
guys did a great first we feast guide to
New York City bodegas mhm where you said
that one of the first signs of
gentrification is when poppy puts a rack
of vegan snacks on the counter so with
that in mind I want to show you some of
the other ways food has been gentrified
over the last couple years because I
think the world needs the bodega boys
for spawner alright so first things
first I'm the illest so we're here he's
like yeah you guys have any thoughts on
the Whole Foods chop cheese has never
ridden a train I've never seen a
four-story building never heard of rap
out whenever just bland like chop cheese
in essence only like that's chopped and
it's cheese but it's not a sandwich a
chop cheese is nothing better nothing
shops especially if you like squash boom
at all for you ride a night is a perfect
drunk food have you seen st. Felix and
Hollywood selling 40s of colt 45 and
I've read about the bag for 15 bucks if
people will pay that get the money yeah
hustle man listen as Bronx lights bro
we're always looking for a ski no I'm
saying if that's the scheme if they can
pay 15 if they got are $15 for a 40 in a
brown bag man wait watch charged we know
if the table service Nutcracker yeah I'm
ready I'm not ready for these 29 your
item like welcome oh man oh tableside
Newport sir
Cheers oh I'll light a for you $25 do
you guys have any thoughts on these
avocado only restaurants like avocado
Rhea in Brooklyn I feel like in five
years we're gonna have like a shortage
of avocados and it's no because the
restaurants at this
you can't build a whole restaurant
around avocado avocado extra like when
you go to Foley they're not like start
with guacamole at the end they're like
whoa yo yo my god yo fake if it is ready
you section are you you have the
financial fortitude to us you gotta ask
you Dyke because before you a while he
was like I'm kids yo red beans clothes
Wow
my financial advisor jeepers oh boy this
is gonna give me smack mm-hmm yeah it'll
play around with scotch bonnet my sister
we went to Jamaica they have the Scots
bonded the peppered shrimp and she was
eating it and she touched her eyeball
but we were driving in the country
Jamaica so now we had to stop it like a
hand-pump thing and I was like you just
looking like amoebas inn-yard
that's the thing it's good that you know
that because people come out in the show
all the time and they're just a little
bit reckless they get a little water and
then the boom and watch bother you
mm-hmm so as we mentioned in your intro
Jesus and Merrill its back tonight you
bawl bags and then there's been a lot
that's gone on in rap news during your
TV hiatus Soulja Boy recently had one of
the most amazing press runs everywhere
his build is this hip hop pioneer
entrepreneur would you invest in the
soldier boy's startup no soldier boy he
has some ideas but a lot his ideas seem
like you're trapped in a corner he's
walked up yeah yeah they're all
after-hours business pictures he's like
no I want to make a video game system me
like oh we start from scratch he's like
no I know a guy out in China
I'm like blank consoles okay that sounds
highly illegal yo chicken it's gonna
have every game from every system right
watch my ex possibly Xbox games you can
get them all you get to switch the Xbox
re-click overhaul that look at my
Bitcoin is doing numbers y'all yeah he
hasn't proven to me that he is the Elan
musk hip-hop yeah one thing that you
guys have been consistent on since the
early podcast days is that J Cole his
trash if you turn if you turn the page
on the thing is we're still like boys
come back so I'm not really listening to
walk music like I listen to music that's
probably bringing down black people yeah
I got here little gunplay a little
misogyny make some cocaine rap yeah you
know Jake owes not really my cup of tea
but some people love it and then some
Jake old songs
I'll be jamming to it oh who is it oh
okay all right so say
Blueface know how does this Takashi's
6:9 saga end
oh my god everybody in the world like
you pause grandma in jail
what's wild is like he's Mitchell
everyone and I think he saw a lot of law
and order so he's gonna be like we're
gonna put me I will do it in this
protection take a bike you have a
six-night tattooed on your face stupid
there is no you can't go to Scott is
this low riser you feel it coming up
back
you get up on you alright guys we have a
recurrent segment on our show called
explaining that grammar we do a deep
dive on our guest Instagram pull
interesting pictures that need more
contact so I'm bust out the laptop I'll
show you the picture use tell me the
bigger story does that sound good
sounds good alright laptop please thank
you sir like first of all this is at the
VMAs movie I believe you're banned from
because we were [ __ ] Wilding the
night before Pete Davidson came and
delivered his Twizzlers on a hoverboard
at the Ritz Carlton yes after security
security nuru smoker Odie weed but we
could we were staying at the Ritz
Carlton they're like I guess they're
rich so we can't stop them yeah so they
were just bothering everyone else around
there meanwhile Pete Davis is doing 316
Twizzlers Halloween so we get to the
VMAs and I don't have anyone here been
to a VMAs I do not know they're open bar
we are like super boys and like we've
never been anywhere with that celebrity
so we're just walking y'all a [ __ ] talk
to us yo we literally spent like you
know the rent whole red carpet separate
people [ __ ] we're standing behind
Vanessa Hudgens and I was like I'm super
duper high and that's Anna right a
moment like she's where you are yeah oh
it's like yo she's like we're just like
they're like please sit down don't stand
we sit down and then Amber Rose and blac
time to come and sit in front of us
they're wearing body suits that are
covered in slurs so don't remember that
so were they you know cuz we're media
[ __ ] we're like damn we're not gonna
Tom I don't know what
Mirel says to Amber Rose she turns
around and looks at him with such
disgust I think she's about to punch him
blac chyna sees this comes running over
I'm like yeah we came from the boss
together we leave in LA together I'm
saying if we fight amber Rosa flash I'm
fighting right now right now
okay thankfully it never came to the
fisticuffs we walking around we see Jada
Smith we chopping it up with him so I'm
talking to Jada and whatever and I look
out the corner of my eye and I see Miro
and he's like his his head stops here on
some
serbian killer is Kanye's bodyguard
brought this dude chest was the size of
a toddler mattress like it was it like
your man was this wide so I'm just all I
hear was I want to hear from Kanye I
want to hear from Kanye cuz I went up
and I was like yo can I get a photo
what kind of you know I'm saying cuz I
was like oh this is it this is it you
know I'm saying this is our fault this
is our Al Bundy for touchdown game you
know say like and a bodyguard is like yo
you're not talking to Kanye and I was
like I want to hit him tell me that [ __ ]
I put it a Kanye like I want to hear him
tell me that [ __ ] Mac I see I'm like oh
if we find the bodyguard we all fight I
got anybody go so I run over there like
what's up what's up the kite is just
like all right come on come on but Kanye
cuz he's so cool he refuses to stand so
you have to squat down to take the
picture look so if you notice me rows in
the aisle I decided I was gonna squat
down next to Kanye what I didn't realize
was a very pregnant Kim Kardashian it
was in the seat behind me and I ended up
sitting on Kim Kardashian and Kanye goes
watch out for my wife knows my life dog
Makani was very excited to see us as you
can see
yeah he's very happy
[Music]
mmm she doesn't win like that first you
like oh this ain't [ __ ] and then you
feel it like huh it's good though so
four years you guys have rift on
trending topics on a hot mic without
much of a filter why do you think you've
avoided the problematic police at least
in a big PR disaster way is the keyed
easiest to just say allegedly and
qualify everything that way um I think
it's more resource center yeah there are
certain things you know that you could
have gotten away with saying in onine
that you should not even formally as a
sentence in your head don't you put in
your drafts okay I'm sorry
have you watched the progression of our
comedy there's certain jokes we used to
do that we won't do anymore
because as we've experienced the world
that we've come across with different
people we realized that the humor hits
differently that a certain joke that
might have been funny four years ago
like you actually meet a person from
this specific group and you're like oh
[ __ ] like I even know that was offensive
Oh like guests moved from the Bronx it's
like I suck my dick know that [ __ ] but
we're not in the crosshairs of PC
culture like that because we're not like
fighting against it like we're not
without they're like oh now you can say
what you want you've got to be funny
about it am i smart about it and
approach it the right way and don't just
say something for shock value because
that's what a lot of people do a lot of
people just like oh you're offended oh
sorry
like triggered you lib [ __ ] like and you
know like we say there are people who
sorry our readers doing that but it's
just like at the end of day what's the
what's the expectancy yeah how long can
you do that for like what do you think
has changed because you know when you
started out making jokes for the
internet it's doing that like gratata
yeah Aereo era the i'ma keep it G real
yeah like what do you think is different
about making jokes for the internet now
versus that man we burp that whole [ __ ]
man
[ __ ] just do it [ __ ] like that
before but you're gonna go hey you know
this will do [ __ ] like that for us
because we're going to our videos
[ __ ] took that whole flow
our whole flow short mo folks talking
about academics academic
I could what man get the [ __ ] out of
here man oh [ __ ] well [ __ ] cigar hole
flow man
my body's already kind of pushing back
it smells like trouble okay you
definitely feel like garlic mm-hmm yeah
yeah this is well get this one stung
again
I'm gonna leave that one right there
right jo-ann's uh that Reaper part
that's why I got me nervous
says your fans know you guys rep New
York hard as hell especially when it
comes to sports where is the food better
Madison Square Garden or Yankee Stadium
that's a good question
and what's my tongue cry whoa it's
getting a little huh master square
garden if you are like a season ticket
holder for the Rangers or the Knicks
they have like the VIP before the game
and they have like the biggest blondes
I've ever seen like and this is like
people Long Island let me get my [ __ ]
prong on oh hey hey hey got a couple
points here yeah you know was a good guy
Lecter you ever seen him when he played
oh my god that was Eric Henry glut quest
never lets a punk get past and all right
this Trump guys doing the right jobs the
Liberals Adam riess yeah anyway I gotta
go my trainer Ronkonkoma is coming in
all right gotta leave you know I'll be
back here next week WOD to catch Billy
Joel lasgo arrangers do you guys have a
barroom take on the great Michael Jordan
verse LeBron James versus Coby Branco
debate that's where we are we divide cuz
he feels LeBron is ago mm-hmm George oh
no Jordan is like y'all mythical
dunked on everybody he changed the game
ah he was not a six nine freight train
that had court vision like Magic Johnson
you know I'm saying you know I mean like
and there's a tweet that just I just
retweeted it go on my Twitter right now
[ __ ] that says that LeBron has a
higher percentage of go ahead field
goals with 10 seconds or less in the
playoffs than Michael Jordan so suck my
dick that doesn't matter let's talk
about who had better genes okay what
Michael Jordan Michael joy more acid
wash jeans he did Chelsea cut boobs
first ones they [ __ ] them kids yeah may
I play with our double hoop earring
mm-hmm who gambles it to 6:00 in the
morning and then put drops like 56
points and everybody I heard the flu and
it is like has the wall attitude about
it the greatest video ever is that video
where someone challenged Michael Joyner
was like yo of you if you can you hit
five shots in a row all these kids get
free sneakers for the summer camp and
Michael Jordan was like [ __ ] [ __ ] them
kids kids go home barefoot [ __ ] them
kids love that guy if you guys were
hand-picked to represent the Knicks and
free agency what would be your pitch to
Kevin Durant
yo bro I will personally brush your hair
every
mmm-hmm no I'm your life spinning bell
ah-1 all your burner accounts you see
masala YF am completely fan number one
unless you're a fan 1980 yo freak 87
ring 79 all that dawg your knowledge
double top you will get in the city
oh wow wow such a good player why does
he get more cool Wow Wow remember how
Josh league was before Katie can you get
that translated yeah I got you bill I'm
saying alright are you guys ready to
move on probably all right here we go
[Music]
don't burn already Bernie there's like
when you first the puberty and you don't
really know what you're doing and use
like facial cleaner and get into iodized
you guys have been making TV shows
podcasts live tours press days all
together over the last five plus years
but how well do you really know each
other it's time to find out and we're
game of fiying it this is the bucket oh
BFF questions where this is Merrill okay
you'll reach in there and you'll ask
Jesus question then you'll pass the
bucket okay so he says he'll reach in
there well I know about him is yeah for
kids that's all I know
[Music]
what's the number one complaint you hear
about me from our show's producers and
aura crew they want to play about Miro
he does not respond to emails or text
messages in a timely fashion and
sometimes just three to four days yes
yes where people are like yeah what's
the best way to reach me I was like I
was like I don't know all right
Mira what's one thing your wife dislikes
about me I don't know it is cuz I'm
single so I'll be taking more wild
adventures like you should just be in a
hotel as a family man yeah it's like
yeah I don't like when you're
unavailable that's will be the show
Chloe
that's the East Coast wife she's like
what was that my clique yeah - I'm doing
a Henry specialist
breaking up relationships who's like
dudes Jimmy Fallon love you Jimmy
[Music]
look this is not made for you now he
finishes it this is not maybe starting
accomplish go finish it Jolla fool she
has become the most visible
representation of this very regional
specific New York style of comedy so on
this wing we want a city guide through
to of Bronx finest what can you tell the
people about the appeal of La Marina and
Dyckman and then what did its closing
what impact did that have on nightlife
in the Bronx think about the most
beautiful beach we've ever been to
yes like probably the French Riviera you
know I'm saying this yachts and jay-z
take all this hair from it dump this
[ __ ] our parking lots around you wanna
do you want to smoke hookah were people
who clearly are using your credit card
cuz their cameras La Marina do you want
cabanas what girls stand on them and
dirty air force was yo come through but
I say all this but if you saw me a lava
Rita you know anytime over I was having
the [ __ ] time of my life can you make
a case for a city island being the best
beach in New York City
Wow where else can you have a puta Rican
dude popping a wheelie on a motorcycle
next to a 50 year old racist Italian man
and also two Latina women having a fight
with chairs at the end of the island and
they're all Yankee fan they're all yours
that's the common bond which is the more
iconic New York couple Alex Rodriguez
and JLo or Remy mom Papoose rumba mom
pop was wrong neither j.lo and puffy he
shot the handle of the burner he did
come on that's low that's wrong
[Music]
all right guys this is the last tab we
call it the last tab because it's
tradition around here to put a little
extra on the last wing I don't have to
if you don't want to oh listen listen
shout to Christian Christian told us God
a bit up he said don't OD with the dab
so it's for you homie all right last
wing you here we go hey
some other being first shot be a
masculine
faster faster I'll know oh no no oh oh
alright Jesus and Mary oh here we are at
the end of our journey we've covered a
lot of ground today but one thing we
haven't talked about are the AKS and
when we saw you guys at the Apollo
last year you'll have the whole crowd
chanting a K is like you guys are ariana
grande holding out a mic and letting the
audience carry the verse right so now
that the brains are fried tongues on
fire blood is boiling
can you give us a 62nd aka barrage
I'll start the clock and go superboy
Jesus nice aka you can't see that one
anymore you can Christmas whistling the
aka belie Libya shake ok butchers Pluto
aka
pockets a fat lights here we go ok a
package in fat like here we go we got a
David your man we got mr. Marino that's
my middle with Nicole just Amina and
fresh misdemeanor ok your problematic
BAE aka give me no small change give me
what big money wine David Yurman these
bloody shoes these expensive decent
bloody shoes because we got we got we
got we got to phone Jose jeez like
marking up we got mr. 240 because I got
my Pinot blurry
40 hours of Anthony in nails the
dismount and look at you guys 10 wings
up 10 wings down yeah there's nothing
left to do but roll out the red carpet
for you guys this camera this camera
this camera let the people know what you
have going on in your life yo February
21st was just tonight you know say an 11
o'clock the number one show all a night
makes the save you coming back to date
back to the streets you know saying if
you saw any article
On February 20th about I ran off to
Africa like Dave Chappelle disregarded
disregard that was good he did now run
off with the bag oh we got the arm the
sleep apnea mask come in this summer
remember all our kids that you know you
don't breathe so good so you know the
brand of straw nebulizers for illness
that's right yo give her your heart
stops while you sleep we get it starting
again oh yeah we're gonna be on the
beach okay screams oh that's right don't
we do ice box
[Laughter]
because you just do this like this is
crazy
you know what am I gonna do get a real
job breaking news hot ones fans this is
Sean Evans checking in to say there's a
major storm a-brewin make sure that you
batten down the hatches
stock up on non perishables and while
you wait out the storm
why not binge watch some old hot ones
like comment subscribe who appreciates
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