good morning mr lapid
i am colonel hanslander of the ss i was
hoping you could invite me inside your
home and we could have a discussion
of course please come in
now as you may have heard i am in charge
of rounding up all the jews
in this village yes i have heard that
are you aware of any jews hiding in the
area
no no i assure you there haven't been no
jews in this village
there haven't been no jews so there have
been some juice
oh uh sorry no i meant uh there haven't
been any juice
no juice here sorry i was confused by a
double negative
you see grandma is very important to the
nazi party
now are you familiar with
one shashana dreyfus
yes i know her me and her buy our milk
at the same market
me and her surely you meant to say she
and
i yes of course
the trick is to take the other person
out of the sentence to see if it makes
sense me buy milk
i think not i buy milk you see
i swear i do not know where madame is of
life is that
did you just end a sentence with a
preposition
forgive me colonel when was the last
time you saw the jude rifus
about a month ago i was walking by the
river payon
and i saw dreyfuss fishing so i went
down
to the river bank to see if it was her
but
i couldn't get the computer
did you really think i was so stupid i
wouldn't recognize a run-on sentence
sorry there was no jews here you are
jews
plural plural wrong you have to match
your subject with your verb
what do you want from me i've heard from
numerous sources
you are hiding mademoiselle dreyfus
from
don't kill me please
mr lapid i have one more question for
you if you answer correctly
i will leave you and your family at
peace
if not you are coming with me
now let's say you were writing a list
would you or would you not put a comma
before the
end it depends on whether you are
following the chicago manual of style or
the associated press guide
hiding under the floorboards i have
finally found you
wait you are hiding under the
floorboards or is she
a dangling participant a dangling
participant
you