4 Signs That You Are An Insecure Person
Every day we find ourselves in situations that test our attitude, and the way we face
them tells a lot about our personality. There are many specific traits, which help us identifying
insecure people, or someone with low self-esteem. In this video we'll look into 4 of these traits.
And don’t worry, if you identify yourself in one or more of these traits, I have some good news
for you: they're all fixable with a little bit of effort. So, let's find out more about these signs:
1. You lack assertiveness Putting others before ourselves
is definitely honorable, as well as a great show of altruism, but the problem with this approach is
that many people end up becoming victims of this attitude, and begin suffering from it.
It's important to understand that, in order to feel good with others, we have to learn to feel
good with ourselves first, and to do this, we have to stop being afraid of saying "no",
even at the cost of looking selfish, if necessary. Life is ours and ours only, thus we have to
live it in the best possible way for us, while obviously also respecting others.
This goes for both personal and professional relationships. If you don't want to see someone,
just tell the person straight to his or her face, if you feel you deserve a pay increase,
go talk to your boss. Just don't be constantly scared about all the possible negative
consequences of every action you take, it's much better to try and fail, than living in regret
about what could possibly have been. 2. You are Always Feeling the
Need to Justify Yourself Recently, John bought an
old used car. When John drives around his home town he tries not to make himself noticed as he
fears being judged by his friends and colleagues for not driving a brand-new car as they do. If
they were to talk to John about his car, he'd certainly feel the need to justify himself and
explain why he didn't buy a more expensive one. This is just a random example, but many feel the
need to explain themselves and not only to friends and relatives, but also to absolute
strangers. The fact of the matter is that all of this is an clear sign of insecurity. Others
should not give a damn about what car you drive! If you like it, you drive it and that's it. If
you like dressing in pink, talk politics with your goldfish and climb the stairs backwards,
just do it and don't care about others. You can be quite sure that those judging
and criticizing others all the time probably have nothing better to do with their lives.
Unless our actions become harmful towards others, we should never be worried about
other people's opinions, with the exception of those providing constructive criticism of course.
3. You are Always Looking For An Excuse If you never do anything wrong,
you're probably a loser. Those who never make mistakes usually do so because they
love to live within their comfort zone, without ever trying anything new nor taking any risks.
If you made a mistake, just admit it, don't look for excuses. In 99% of cases,
mistakes concern issues which are easily fixable. You just have to admit it and work hard to fix it.
Very often we'll come across people making a big deal out on petty things,
or easily fixable mistakes - this is their problem, and as Abraham Lincoln once said,
"you can measure a person's greatness simply by observing what makes him angry."
4. You are unable to receive compliments This is quite peculiar. For this last
point I could have chosen something such as "inability to face criticism",
but it would have been way too easy. Those following this channel regularly already know
that being unable to accept constructive criticism is not only a sign of stubbornness, but also of
great insecurity. Instead for the last point I picked the inability to receive a compliment.
It's unbelievable how often people will react to a compliment by showing fake modesty,
or by somewhat refusing to simply acknowledge the compliment, even though in good will.
Think about a friend seeing you after a very long time, and making some nice remarks about your
physical shape. There's no need to put yourself down by answering something like "not really,
I don't actually like myself", or "I'm not sure, maybe I should lose a few more pounds". By doing
so you're not only putting yourself down, but your reaction may even prove irritating for
the other person, who was just trying to make you feel good by paying you a compliment - hey,
I know what you're thinking. Perhaps you're wondering: "but was the compliment really
sincere?”, and to be honest it doesn't even make that much of a difference. If it was a
sincere compliment we would be responding in a far from ideal way, and also in case
of a circumstantial compliment, the person making it probably did so with good intentions,
to make us feel better, and also in this case, we would have put them down with our response.
Now, you're probably asking yourself "Ok, but what should I say, then? Should I have a list of
"correct" sentences to use for each circumstance?" The answer is "no", because there is a simple word
which will make you appear confident, that you can use whenever you receive a compliment, and will
show your gratitude to the person complimenting you, and this word is simply saying "Thank you".
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