So I was at a party last night which explains why I’m looking so sleepy today. It was
a long boring party and I just wanted to leave and go home but I really didn't know how to
excuse myself, which is when I realized how important it is to learn how to excuse yourself
in social situations.
Hello, hello and very warm welcome to today's lesson. My name is Rima and today I’m gonna
teach you how you can excuse yourself in social situations; a very important art is what I
have learnt. Well, I have written down a few ways in which you can excuse yourself when
you want to leave a particular situation but it's kind of a setting wherein you can't just
walk out. You have to say something. You have to give a little bit of an explanation. Okay,
so let's look at the first way.
It says I'm afraid I will have to take your leave. So, imagine you're at a dinner or a
party and you want to leave for whatever reason. Instead of just walking up to your host and
saying, okay, I'm leaving or you know what I'm bored, I'm on my way out. These things
are not polite. So how about, if you say, I'm afraid I will have to take your leave
which kind of gives the feeling that you know you really have to go, against your will.
Like you don't really want to go but you have to go, you know. So it sounds more formal.
It sounds like you don't really want to leave, you want to spend time. You want to be there
for longer but you know the situation or the time is not allowing you. So I use this very
often and I must tell you, it works every time. Whether it is a formal meeting, whether
it's a party or a dinner, I'm afraid; I will have to take your leave. You have to put a
little conviction on your face and it's gonna work every time.
Moving on, the next one, I actually have some people waiting for me. Now this one is golden
because who wants to keep anybody waiting? It’s considered rude, it's considered impolite.
I'm sure the host of your party or dinner or the person you're meeting with also does
not like to keep anybody waiting. So if you go and tell the host of your party or the
person you're meeting with, actually I have some people waiting for me, so can I take
your leave? Of course, if you glance at your watch, it adds a little more drama to the
whole situation and yes this will work too. so actually, I have some people waiting for
me puts you as a considerate person who likes to be on time everywhere and who doesn't like
to keep people waiting and instead of being awkward, this line actually shows you in a
positive light.
Moving on, I have the next one. So this one, in particular, is for phone calls. Now let's
say, there are certain phone calls or certain people in particular that you don't want to
attend to at a particular time. So if you use the excuse, I’m with people right now,
can I speak to you later? Now this works every time, I'll tell you why it works? Imagine
you're sitting with a group of people and your phone rings. you're obviously gonna feel
a little awkward taking a personal call or even a work call for that matter in front
of other people. So will excuse yourself, right? Naturally, right? Now imagine there's
a phone call that you don't want to attend in any case or maybe you don't have an answer
for that person right now. So you could very well use this excuse, I'm with some people
right now, can I speak to you later? This works every time. It seems like you're a considerate
person who doesn't like to be rude to other people. At the same time, you want to talk
to the caller, it's not like you're avoiding the caller, it's just that you don't have
time right now. In order to make this convincing, if you can sound a little quiet and say, hey
I'm with people right now, can I call you later? That kind of adds a little more conviction
to the whole situation.
Moving on, now this one can be used very, very often and it' quite dangerous, I must
tell you because this one actually means one thing but makes the person feel another thing.
So, this one can be used on the phone as well as in any other situation. Okay, so I'm gonna
write phone or meeting or any situation which is social. So I'm gonna write socially, okay.
So can I catch you later at length? So let's say, you are with some people and the phone
rings okay I'm gonna first use the phone situation. The phone rings okay and somebody wants to
talk to you in great detail about a particular topic. Now you don't have the time at that
point of time, okay. So you don't want the person feel like you're neglecting the person
or you're cutting the person short, which can really you know make the person feel really
offended. So you can say, can I catch you later at length? Meaning can I give you a
lot of time, just not right now, later and that sounds really good. Now if you're in
a meeting, okay and say you know you're meeting with one particular person and a third person
joins in for some reason and the third person wants to talk a lot or wants to go into great
detail about certain things. now if you tell this person, you know what I'd love to talk
to you but can I catch you later at length, so that we can give this so much more time.
Now it makes the third person feel important, at the same time, it also forces the third
person to kind of take your leave and move on, so that you can continue with the conversation
that you were having. So this one is really golden, make sure you use it well. Can I catch
you later at length? Now at length over here means at peace or when you have a lot of time.
So, anybody who wants your time, these words are golden to their ears. They’d love to
talk to you at length.
Moving on, this one, I'm sure I don't need to teach you this one. We’ve all used it
at some point in time. At some point in time, it has been real for us. At some point in
time, we’re just using it as an excuse. Suddenly, I don't feel too well. So I would
like to take your leave, meaning you're not feeling very good. you're feeling slightly
sick you know or you feel like you have a fever coming on or a headache coming on and
you don't want to be working right now or you don't want to be in that situation right
now. You want to leave and once you say this, you will obviously get a lot of sympathy,
a lot of concern from the other person and you won’t have to explain anything further.
So if you have no explanations or you're genuinely feeling sick, you could just excuse yourself
by saying suddenly, I don't feel too well, can I please take your leave? And that will
be that.
Moving on, this one is good too, you know and nowadays with people keeping a very, very
busy schedule, a crazy routine, this one is used a lot. Now let's say, you've been invited
to a dinner. Okay now you've done your socializing, you've met the host, you've spent time with
the people that you had to spend time with. Now you want to leave but the dinner's still
on and a lot of people are still there. So how do you excuse yourself? Okay, you could
just say, you know what, I have someplace to be meaning I have to reach somewhere. Okay,
so I have someplace to be meaning I have to reach somewhere, so can I catch you later?
or can I take your leave or I would like to leave and when people realize that you have
to reach somewhere, they obviously won't be standing in your way and you could get out
of there quite easily.
Now the next one is, similar to this one but the difference is, this can be used in a formal
situation like a work meeting. Now say you’ve gone for a formal work meeting and that meeting
has overshot its time. It's gone on and on and now you want to leave. You can just say,
I have a prior commitment, so I would like to take your leave. Now, what does prior commitment
mean? Prior means earlier and commitment could be a meeting or an appointment. now naturally
everyone sets their appointments and meetings well in advance, so when you say, I have a
prior commitment, it means that you have already planned something earlier which could be a
meeting, an appointment or some sort of personal work, okay and because of that, you need to
leave. So when you say, I have a prior commitment, it sounds more formal and it's best used in
a work setting.
Moving on, I have the next one which is, I have a meeting to attend. Now, this is very
close to the earlier ones but this one clearly says what you have to do next. You have a
meeting to attend, so you could just say, you know what I have a meeting to attend but
can I call you and we can speak about this. So it shows that you're a busy person, you
have things lined up and you have to do all of those things at the same time, the person
that you are talking to, is important to you also and I think this one's really nice and
straightforward and simple. Simple is what I love.
Moving on, now this one has been used by many people. let's say you're in a party or in
a social function or say you know just a place where you know, you mingle and talk to work
people, you're just socializing and suddenly one conversation’s getting a little too
boring, a little too awkward for your own taste. Then what will you do? You could say
something like, I just remembered, I have to make an important work call or I just remembered
I have to make an important personal call. Now we all have our cell phones right there
in our hands, all you have to do is use your tiny little best friend and get out of that
awkward situation. so you can just say, that you have an important call to make or an important
call to take, if your phone rings in the presence of the other person and just excuse yourself,
works every time and of course last but not the least, I have, I'm tired, I think I'll
call it a day. Now it always happens that we are very busy people, we have busy schedules
and sometimes it gets a little tiring. so if you want to excuse yourself out of a situation,
all you have to say is, you know I think I'm really tired, so I'm gonna call it a day.
Now, what does calling it a day mean? Call it a day means that you're done for the day,
you want to finish your day and you want to head home or wherever that you have to go.
another way of using this would be if it's a night situation or an evening situation
and you think, it's getting very late in the night and maybe you have an early start in
the morning, so you could just say, I think I'm tired, I think I'll call it a night. Yeah
so just replace day with night, it just means you want to finish your night, you can even
add, I have an early start tomorrow. Now that always sounds very convincing.
So I really hope that the next time you're stuck in an awkward social situation or you
want to leave from somewhere, you won't be lost, you won't be confused, you’ll probably
just use one of these lines and you'll be just fine. I sincerely hope you've enjoyed
today's lesson. I'll be back again with many more lessons, this is me, Rima, taking your
leave and signing out and of course, if you've enjoyed the video, all you have to do is subscribe
to our channel.