Hi guys, welcome to our channel.
This week Rosie and I are going to teach you how to get over a straight girl
Have you ever been in love with a straight girl?
Not in love but i'd definitely been under a straight girl, I have some theories about this
Therefore you are not qualified to do this video, it needs to be from a "love" point of view
What you will never understand is the true heartbreak of being in love with a straight girl
Why do we chase after these straight girls?
When you're in love with a straight girl you think they're incredible right? - Yes
Now let me tell you with a few years on you, looking back,
they are not incredible, they're just straight
Now you look back like 10 years on or whatever
What do you now think about the straight girl you were in love with?
Still in love with her
Is that a plot twist?
Get a gay girl who acts straight
What?
The whole lesbian community's all like "mehmehmeh i don't wanna get hurt by a bi girl"
Oh but you'll risk it for a straight girl
I think it's like a rite of passage for any young lesbian to fall in love with a straight girl.. - I agree
...because for some reason everybody even deep inside that noggin wants what they can't have.
I was just about to say that's why, everyone wants what we can't have
that's why you want things that are too expensive that you can't afford
I have been in love with a straight girl
I can tell you now that you carry it, you carry it for years
because you secretly always believe there is a chance that you can both be happy and in love forever.
Now some straight girls will let you believe that there's a chance
and that's exactly what happened to me - Right
Can i interject and say I think there's two types of this right
I think there are straight girls that for their own ego string you along yeah
and they're like "oh yeah I want you to want me,everyone wants me but i don't want you"
Fell for it
Right, or there's a straight girl "Is she not straight?" if she give- if she flirts with you,
you think she's- you know being really smiley and touchy
and oh she knows you're a lesbian she touches your boob
what? why would she do that to me?
Yeah - Why?
But like I don't want to give people hope that sometimes I think that's a 50% chance of hope
If you've got.. - No Rosie, don't do it, don't give them the hope
don't give them the hope that doesn't exist
Wouldn't it be- - I slept with a straight girl
Oh have you?
Yeah
Yeah..so haven't i
Straight until wet
Isn't that what they say? - That's what they say about spaghetti
Same applies - Yeah, same applies
What I'm essentially gathering from what you just said is that you believe
for any young person currently in love with a straight girl, there is a 50% chance of success
Yeah
Straight girl is like a car when they run over small puppies
they will just destroy anything in their wake
for the gain of their own personal journey
and you might be under the wheels of that straight girl, or you wish you were
but you know what, she's never gonna stop, slow down and check if you're okay
You know why? because she's got places to go and that place is called "straight town"
Straight girls are like a Pina Colada
They taste like coconut and you want more and more
I bet that's true, i bet they do taste like coconut - Oh yeah they do
You might turn a bend and be like "yeah she flirted back with me"
and then you might turn another bend and be like "she doesn't care"
Ironically, if you go down a straight girl road, you'll end up going round and round.
It's not raw, it's not still raw
How can it be raw after 10 years? - It's not raw- hey!
If you have a cut it will be disappeared - Hey, hey i'm not being rude,
if you don't cook a chicken for 10 years, what is it? It's raw.
Or alive.
Depending on what kind of life that chicken had.
Oh a vegan would say that.
Don't get me wrong Rosie, I don't care about the straight girl now.
What i'm saying to you is that you cannot deny the feelings that were once raw
because when you're in love so much and it's so unrequited,
you never forget.
Oh we're just hanging out as friends but wait a minute
this is my body
It's not what you should do - The thing is.. - Please don't do that, i learned the hard way
I genuinely have some advice for you
If you want to make a straight girl fall in love with you,
there is one thing that straight girls cannot resist - Go on
Bradley Cooper!
No, no
Magic.
You and i have very difference opinions of what straight girl really means ok
You are going for the princess who likes the big romantic gestures
All straight girls are princesses.
Okay, the girl i fell in love with - All of them want to be treated like princess
Gay girls probably want you to fuck them around - The girl..
That's true, i have a broken mind - It's true, it is true
My straight girl right, she was kind of like
it wasn't all about the big romantic gestures
it was the small things that you take note of
and then maybe like you do for them - What
You did that for them? What did you do for them? - Small tiny things like they might mention something
you remember it, you be like "well i'll do something real cute, real low-key"
and they will be like "Oh that's really amazing, you listen"
and i will be like "yes i do, have you seen my magic?"
Sealed deal
Not gonna happen though
We should do a straight version of "Bitches to the honey bitch"
No, i will fail
No straight girl fancies me - What about your magic?
You don't have to be sarcastic - What about everything you just told me?
I don't know why you're trying to be Lauren Jauregui, choker.
Why are you trying to be Camila Cabello, headband.
That's not even true, i did it before Camila did - Yeah i know
Is that true? i was lying - Yeah
What's a gay girl's favorite donut?
Alternative
What's a gay girl's favorite alcohol brands?
Not wearing a bra.
If you are straight and you lead on someone you know is gay
that makes you an evil person
I think that's a terrible thing to do and if you are on the receiving end of that
straight girl's lies and manipulation
listen to me gaybies, you will get through it
the other side and on the other side
there might be magic
Life is full of emotions,
how are you gonna know the good from the bad if you don't experience them all?
That's what I think. I also think it's very important to actually love someone
who doesn't love you back because you might be the object of someone else's affections
and not even realize and you might not even know what it feels like to
to not be loved, and I think that in life that's something that you need to go through.
I said that's my dad and he said "No it's never happened to me" and i was like "okay.."
I think you got 3 ways to play it with a straight girl - Yeah
One: Unrequited love, just enjoy it.
Without straight girls hurting gay girls there wouldn't be tumblr
Yeah i know, and there would be no fear of bisexuals either but whatever.
Two: You can get over it, get under someone else.
The best way to get over someone is to get under someone,
trust me I've done it before, it works.
and then thirdly you play the goddamn game - Magic!
Thirdly magic! - No! Jealousy, play games!
Can I just say everything to you that I've always wanted to say to the straight girl i fell in love with?
Tried to last year but she didn't want to know
What? You want to say it to me now? - Yeah - Okay
I'm straight
Just get into character
I love going to indie boybands
Why don't we go shopping at Zara and like get some leopard print heels
Zara, I'm applauding that one, that is so true
In this scenario i'm gonna call the straight girl something wildly different from her actual name
I'm gonna call her "Bliv".
Bliv, 10 years ago I fell in love with you because i feel like i told you i was "bisexual"
and you kind of took advantage a little bit and showed me your vagina
a few times as a joke - Yeah
Look, i just want to know that i'm over it
i'm married, i'm successful, i'm happy.
Um just because i sent you a private facebook message a year ago
and you were like "Oh you got married" as if you didn't know, if you don't know who i am online
It doesn't hurt my feelings at all
I wish i had confirmation that you didn't know how successful i was
but look, it doesn't matter, here's some magic.
So to all of those out there who are looking for a little bit of like respite from your terrible life, just remember that
at least you have the capacity to feel, you could be a sociopath
Things are always worse - Yeah
Am i right? - You could be Bliv - You could be Bliv
You could be Bliv's next target
Oh you work in the fashion industry, great
everyone needs underwear, great
Can i say that's such a straight girls job - I know
Alright guys, don't forget to like, comment and subscribe
We'll see you this time next week, always remember that you are special.
I can make Rosie kiss me with just the power of my eyes
Ready Rosie? - Yeah
Guys if in doubt, magic. - Magic.