- [Mario] Mario Kart 8.
- [Orange] Mario Kart 8.
(laughs) (apple groans)
- [Apple] Yeah, we all heard it the first time, Orange.
- [Orange] Hey, did you know I'm
the guy that does that voice?
They hired me to be Mario's voice for a day
and then they gave me a bajllion dollars
cause I did such a good job.
Mario Kart 8.
(laughs)
- [Apple] That is not you, Orange.
You sound nothing like Mario.
- [Orange] I feel like you weren't listening
to me when I said Mario Kart 8.
(Apple groans)
- [Apple] I was listening to you,
would you please stop saying it?
(laughs) (Apple groans)
- [Orange] Alright, alright.
So, who you gonna pick, Little Apple?
- [Apple] Well, I was thinking you know,
since I live every single day of my life a little apple.
- [Orange] Yeah.
- [Apple] I was thinking of going something big.
- [Orange] Okay.
- [Apple] You know, maybe like Donkey Kong,
or -- oh, I got it.
I'm gonna be Bowser.
- [Orange] Okay, finally, pick somebody, jeez.
- [Apple] You're going down, Orange.
Just you wait.
Yeah, boy.
(laughs)
- [Orange] Yeah, I think you sound a little over-confident.
- [Apple] Alright, time to customize our carts.
I'm gonna put some junk in the trunk.
(laughs)
- [Orange] What?
- [Apple] It's this thing I do on my gaming channel.
- [Orange] Okay.
- [Apple] What?
- [Orange] Picking a cart, picking a cart, it's
the cart picking song.
- [Apple] Please tell me you're coming up
with these lyrics off the top of your head.
- [Orange] Nope, I spent hours crafting this song.
Picking a cart, picking a cart, it's the cart picking song.
- [Apple] Okay I got it, no more.
I don't wanna hear this song anymore.
- [Orange] All it needs is just a little bit more dubstep.
Then it'll be perfect.
(laughs)
- [Apple] No, I don't wanna hear the song anymore.
Not with dubstep, not with anything.
Just pick your cart and let's go.
- [Orange] Picking a cart, picking a cart, I picked a cart.
- [Apple] Are you done yet?
- [Orange] Yep, and you know what time it is now?
- [Apple] What?
- [Orange] Picking a track, picking a track,
it's track picking time.
(laughs)
- [Apple] I can't take it anymore.
I have a headache already.
- [Orange] Oh, you're so overdramatic.
(laughs)
- [Apple] Whatever Orange, you're going down.
The Peach's Castle track is my jam.
- [Orange] Let's not get into jam,
some of my best friends have been turned into jams.
(laughs)
- [Apple] Well I'm about to turn you
into Mario flavored jam so watch yourself.
- [Orange] "Mario flavored jam"?
That sounds disgusting.
- [Apple] Yeah, well get ready to be it, Orange.
- [Orange] Yeah, whatever. - [Apple] Here we go.
- [Orange] Oh yeah. - [Apple] Let's do this.
- [Orange] And we're off. - [Apple] Yeah
- [Orange] Later slowpoke.
(laughs)
- [Apple] Whatever you know what they say,
slow and steady wins the race you know.
- [Orange] Yeah he wins a slow race,
the idea here is to be as fast as possible, little buddy.
(laughs)
- [Apple] I know what the idea is, thank you very much.
- [Orange] You sure?
- [Apple] That's why I'm beating you,
yeah beating your butt.
- [Orange] Oh, big words from a little apple.
(laughs)
- [Apple] Whatever, eat my dust.
- [Orange] I'm right on your tail, little buddy.
I'm coming after you.
Mario's gonna be winner, winner, chicken dinner.
Ah, see you later buddy.
- [Apple] Ah, I hit the wall.
I'm gonna get you, Orange.
Just you wait.
Here I come.
- [Orange] I hope you like bananas.
- [Apple] Oh yeah, triple, whiple flip.
Oh no!
(Orange laughs)
- [Orange] Taste banana, you apple!
(laughs hysterically)
- [Apple] You say apple like it's an insult.
- [Orange] Well, it is.
- [Apple] Not if you actually are an apple it's not.
- [Orange] Well, the way you're driving is an
insult to apples everywhere.
(laughing hysterically)
(Apple groans)
I hope you like bananas cause I'm laying them everywhere.
Yeah.
- [Apple] All I got was a stupid mushroom.
I want something better than a mushroom.
- [Orange] Oh, oh, oh no, no!
Ah man, oh crap.
- [Apple] What's going on over there, Orange?
- [Orange] I don't know.
Some stupid goombas decided to practice a cheerleading
routine in the middle of the street.
- [Apple] Weird. - [Orange] Woo hoo!
Lap 2.
Whoa, yeah, that rhymed.
(laughs)
Hey, little apple?
How's lap 1?
Is it fun?
(laughs hysterically)
- [Apple] Hardy, har, har, har.
I'm on lap 2 now, ya know, too.
Yeah.
- [Orange] You've got a tutu? - [Apple] No.
Toad, come back.
Oh no.
Would you stop putting bananas all over the track?
(Orange laughs)
- [Orange] Hey, I just thought you were low in potassium.
- [Apple] Well, I'm not.
I don't need anymore bananas.
Whoa, oh no, I almost hit another banana, jeez.
(Orange laughs)
- [Orange] Are you sure your cart
doesn't have banana magnets on it?
(laughs)
- [Apple] That is not a thing.
I'm 95% that that is not a thing. Aw, man.
(Orange groans)
- [Orange] Who is that guy?
(Apple groans)
Who is that guy?
He totally hit me.
- [Apple] Why do they keep giving me mushrooms?
It's not going to help me right now.
I need something better, like a star,
or maybe a blue shell.
- [Orange] Oh, I've got something for you.
Maybe another banana.
(laughs)
- [Apple] Would you knock it off with the bananas already?
For crying out loud.
(Apple groans)
Oh no.
I got hit again
- [Orange] Woo hoo!
Hey, Little Apple, you like my parachute?
- [Apple] Yeah, it's okay.
- [Orange] You think it's para-cute?
(laughs)
- [Apple] Enough with the rhyming already.
Enough, enough, enough!
- [Orange] What? You've had enough of that stuff?
(laughs)
- [Apple] I've had about enough of this, Orange.
That's it.
Oh yeah, how do you like my majestic Bowser kite?
That's how it's done right there.
- [Orange] That's a kite done right.
(laughs)
Last one, I promise.
- [Apple] I'll believe it when I see it.
- [Orange] Oh, man, now I wish I had a Mario kite.
- [Apple] You may win this race, but I've won the kite war.
- [Orange] Whatever, Little Apple.
Go fly a kite or something.
(laughs)
- [Apple] You know, Orange, just cause you laugh
at something, doesn't mean it's actually funny.
- [Orange] Sure it does, observe.
Snickerdoodle.
(laughs)
- [Apple] That wasn't funny.
(Orange laughs)
Stop laughing, it wasn't funny.
- [Orange] Snickerdoodle, snickerdoodle, snickerdoodle
snickerdoodle, snickerdoodle, snickerdoodle, snickerdoodle
snickerdoodle.
(laughs)
- [Apple] This has got to be the stupidest
conversation I have ever had in my life.
If there's a dumber conversation to be had,
I don't want to experience it ever.
- [Orange] Hey, Little Apple,
what do you call a cookie's pet?
- [Apple] I don't know.
What? - [Orange] A snicker-poodle.
(laughs) (Apple groans)
Yeah, I win.
I am the champion, my friend.
- [Apple] Not yet, you're not.
We've still got three races to go, buddy.
- [Orange] Yeah, I guess you could win those races,
if I play with my eyes closed.
(laughs)
- [Apple] Yeah, well I dare you to actually do it.
Play next race with your eyes closed.
- [Orange] Okay.
- [Apple] Do it. - [Orange] I will.
- [Apple] Prove it.
- [Orange] Okay, sounds fun.
- [Apple] Aw, man, I got ninth place.
Let's get to the next race so I can kick your booty.
- [Orange] Yeah, that koopa really drove that poopa.
(laughs)
Poopa.