This week, we're going to win a race.
And we're not even going to cheat!
We're going to cheat.
I mean, it's "Scam School."
This lovable rapscallion brought you by audible.com.
Welcome to the only show that was born from the make
out session between a bookie and the clown--
"Scam School," the only show dedicated
to social engineering at the bar and on the street.
I'm your host Brian Brushwood.
And this week, for once, we're going
to be totally honest, totally fair.
I'm through trying to swindle people or steal their stuff
or punch old ladies in the stomach
and steal their handbag.
For once, we're going to win a race,
and we're going to do it without cheating much.
Come on.
What is going on, Stu?
Awesome to have yo here.
Carston, my head producer.
Actually slum it right here doing the drink with us.
This is not a drinking contest, but this
is a challenge we're going to do.
We're each going to have-- we have a beer.
We each have a pint glass, all right?
The challenge is we're going to have a race
to get all of the beer from the bottle into the pint glass.
But the rules are you cannot move the bottle.
The bottle is totally locked.
You can move the pint glass if you need to.
And you must use a straw.
Any questions before we go on?
Uh, what if I accidentally drink the beer?
OK, you're right.
If you get, like, a drop down your throat or something,
that's fine.
But let's-- new rule.
99% of the beer has to get inside-- like, almost all
the beer.
And whoever does it first is the big fat winner.
All right, give us a ready set go, Jackie.
Ready, set, go!
How's it coming there, rock-star?
Oh, not great.
Slow and steady wins the race.
I'm trying to siphon it.
I'm about the dust both of you.
I'm giving you notice.
I'm giving you a gigantic head start here.
Oh God, I can't stop drinking it, though.
Carston looks very zen about the whole experience.
He's just like, how do you eat an elephant?
One bite at a time.
Look, come on, man!
You're almost done!
You're almost a third of the way.
I'm telling you, you're so--
I drank most of it.
All right, here we go.
You guys can do it that way.
Here's the way I'm going to do it.
Oh, no way.
And there is.
All at once.
What, are you not going to toast me?
Come on.
I'm the champion!
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I am not going to lie.
This is the first time I've even tried it,
and I'm now in love with this scam.
Although I would say the only regret I have
is that I'm the one who proposed the race
and I'm the one playing the race here.
So of course, you're not surprised when I win.
If you really want to make this thing sing,
then you've got to get a friend who's
a confederate on the inside where you sell
the secret to someone in advance.
You get them to put money on the table.
You propose the bet.
And meanwhile, your friend who knows the trick actually
is the one to win.
And that way, you can split the prize afterwards.
And it works on the simple principle
that once you have a bendy straw in there,
you do an increase of pressure.
If you weren't able to figure out, all I did
was reach over and get a tight seal and blow straight down.
The pressure pushes all the beer down, up through the straw,
and out.
And it looks like it's a little tap spigot,
just like inside a CO2 keg or something, right?
An important thing we figured out,
though, is every bottle is a different size.
And most bendy straws that you can find-- like, I got these
at the $0.99 store-- they were too short.
They end right about here.
So if you were going to do it that way,
you'll notice it would only go down to about the 1/3 mark.
And then you'd have to twist the bottle or something like that.
I like the extra step of making sure
that they're not allowed to move the bottle at all because it
gives them the red herring of thinking there's
something they can do the blast.
And of course, it gets them doing the stuff
like this business like you guys were doing or drinking
it the way you were.
I can't help it.
And I got to tell you.
I did not realize how long it would take you guys.
I was kind of nervous about giving you a head start.
And then instantly, I look and like,
it's going to take them for freaking ever.
I got this thing locked up.
Man, I felt like a slob.
I know.
I felt disgusting.
Now in this case, I let you guys hang yourself on a noose
before I went in and did it.
But I didn't expect you two to jump in and try
to beta me at my own game.
I've got a little bit nervous at that point.
I'm going for the other beer, the other round.
Now, I had been sent something similar to this before.
And I didn't-- I kind of want to try it as an experiment.
I honestly have never tried this.
But this same principle, I've been told,
can be used to give you an advantage.
Not that we condone drink contests or racing
while you're drinking.
Mostly when you're drinking a root
beer or a water or some other responsible beverage,
I've been told that you can use one of these
to make-- you'll be able to drink
much faster than the other guy.
So if you're down for it Stu, just purely for science,
I want to try to chug this thing and see how fast--
If it's for science.
--you can get it down.
All right, ready, set, go.
All right, call it.
I just realized I'm not going to finish it.
We'll go back.
We'll look at the instant replay.
But I'll tell you what.
Subjectively, I mean, that thing went down way fast.
Yeah.
Pretty fast.
I mean, I was definitely ahead head.
Yeah, you definitely won.
And I can tell there's none of that waiting for the bubbles
to slurp in on the side.
Hoo!
I was gunning for that, though.
I'm going to take you down, Brushwood!
I'm going to win at something!
I'll win at alcoholism!
Well, dude, you guys are awesome.
Thank you so much.
Thanks, man.
Use this one in good health, guys.
Now, first and foremost, don't misunderstand us.
We are not advocating that you shotgun your beers.
This trick works just as well with Cokes, Pepsi's rootbeers,
you name it.
But I do want to give a special thanks to Birkir
Tjorvi-- sorry for screwing up your name--
all the way from Iceland who sent this in.
I've seen a lot of applications of this principle,
but this is far and away my favorite.
Everything is laid out right in front of you.
It's totally fair.
And the answer is absolutely elegant.
And I want to hear about your success stories with this scam.
So post them at the boards at scamschool.tv
where you can see all of our episodes
right back to episode one.
That's over 160 episodes.
If you want to suggest your favorite bar scam,
write me directly at brian@revision3.com.
If you're doing the Twitter thing,
you could follow my adventures all across the United States
at twitter.com/shwood or follow the show
at twitter.com/scamschool.
Next week, we're going to learn how eight Chicken
McNuggets just might save a woman's life if she's
really hungry for Chicken McNuggets.
But I'm going to go back in the bar until that makes it.