Happy Sunday.
I found this puppet at a garage sale.
Curtains for you right now, girl!
I think that it's a perfect, valid dialogue
between multiple parts of myself.
Her name is Henrietta Horton.
I'm the one who can bitch and complain.
My puppet represents the side of me
that gets to do all the pouting and complaining.
I started my own little show out on the beach in Venice,
and it's every Sunday morning I go out there,
and it's like Sunday school for Saturday night sinners
and Sunday morning grinners 'cause heathens
and hellcats need to go to church too.
You gotta get while the gettins good, baby.
Well, Tamara says she had no idea
that being prescribed Adderall would lead
to what she calls
a magical journey of creativity and awakening.
I kinda feel like that in the beginning
before I started taking Adderall
I was out there and I was talking to people
and when I started to take the Adderall
it was more of an inner journey.
And for the first time in my life I was able to cry.
My entire life I couldn't feel anything physically,
I couldn't feel anything emotionally,
I was locked down, I had blocks and chains,
you know, the Bible belt was just squeezin' me too tight,
I went through some therapy where everyone else was cryin'
and boohooing in their tissues,
and I'm like, "Why am I not crying?"
I think I was too trapped in my head.
There was something about it that opened my emotions.
So how much are you sleeping?
I'm sleeping pretty much regularly
unless I choose to stay up late,
and I know that Steven gets mad at me for staying up late,
and I wanna go to bed at midnight.
But sometimes my creative genius can come out late at night.
Staying up late is one thing,
6:32 in the morning is another thing.
I mean that's not late, I mean that's into the next day.
Right but I don't know.
I've heard stories about muses and people who are artists
and I know that everyone should be so regimented
and be a nine to five person
and get eight hours of sleep every night,
and I think sleep's important.
Yeah, well let me tell ya something
when you started taking Adderall
you didn't reinvent brain chemistry.
That is what it is and I'm watching you here.
I mean take a look at this.
I mean that's fun.
Looks like you're havin' fun.
Right. How do you interpret
what you're lookin' at here?
I think that, I mean I had, you know my mom died
and she just sent 13 boxes of my stuff from my childhood
and there's my toe shoes, and I got up and I put those on,
and I was able to get up on my toes,
and that's me cleaning the house.
I love manic Mondays.
I get up and I put on the music, and I clean the house
and I get it done where I used to couldn't clean the house.
I would just look at it and say, "Uh, I can't do this.
"I can't face it."
Okay, well let's take a look at this tape.
Okay.
How ya doing, baby?
Momma's here (laughs) what I'm saying.
I scare myself.
I trying to give birth to my adventurous side.
Ahh, you know, I can't take it.
How does that look to you?
Um, it's not as bad as I thought it was gonna look.
I'm having fun.
I mean I used to be a buttoned-up business person,
and I had completely forgot about my inner monster.
Does that look manic to you?
It doesn't look so manic to me,
but I think that I like mania.
It's way better than depression.
If those are the only two choices...
(laughing)
then okay, but the truth is you're sleep deprived, right?
You say it's boring, sleep's boring.
How do you know, you're asleep.
No, I think it is important to get good sleep
because then I can function better.
Does she get good sleep?
No, she does not.
How many hours does she sleep?
Well, it's...
I mean like when she goes to bed, here's the problem.
When she comes to bed at 6:30, seven o'clock in the morning
she'll come to bed and she'll get up at 10:30,
you know, three hours.
And now, that's not everyday,
but it's progressively gotten worse.
If you're staying up and going to bed at 6:30
in the morning and sleeping for three hours
then your brain is altered,
and then you're pouring a way overdose of Adderall
on top of your brain.
You're getting high on speed and runnin' around your house
like a chicken with a head cut off.