- Another massive one with men, including me,
is hair, like hair thickness and hairline.
Like that's probably the biggest issue I've dealt with
from the age of maybe like 18, 19?
- And I couldn't believe this because he,
when we started going out, you were using rogaine
and I had no idea.
(laughs)
He used to hide it in his little, his little bag
of like his toothbrush and stuff.
- Look at this stuff
you got old razors, rogaine,
wait a minute, you use rogaine
I didn't know you need--
- It's preventative.
- But is your hair falling?
- I don't wanna talk about it.
- And I didn't know and you never said it to me.
You didn't say it to me for months and months and months.
And I was so glad when you finally did
because like, I had no idea
how much it bothered you until then.
And it really shocked me actually
like, that it was a thing that you were...
'Cause I always perceived you as so confident.
'Cause you are a very confident person.
I think maybe from the bullying
like it really thickened your skin.
And you don't care about like necessarily
other people's perception of it, but how you see yourself.
It's like when you're looking at yourself in the mirror,
like not seeing yourself.
- Yeah, definitely as I've gotten older
I've stopped really caring what other people think.
But, it's definitely an issue that I've had.
Like, when I was like 18, 19,
maybe my concerns were a little bit premature
like I had quite a big floppy fringe.
But, as I got older, there was a bit less hair there.
Then I started noticing I had to gel
my fringe up, which was good.
Then I had my big quiff, and my quiff became my trademark.
(both laughing)
But, I had this quiff. - I remember that.
- But, I know it was that like, when I didn't want the quiff
and I gel my hair down,
there was just that little bit less hair in my fringe.
And as I got older, probably around 2016,
I realized like, I can't gel my hair down anymore
because it looks ridiculous.
It's just a strand and it was so thin
and now it's like really going back.
Like, I gel my hair forward quite a lot.
I kinda keep it long and gel it forward
to try and cover up a bit.
But, like you've got--
- Like what, can I ask why?
Like why, where do you think that insecurity comes from?
Because so many, it's just normal
that men lose hair as they get older.
So it's like, well actually it was kinda like
the thing with wrinkles.
Like, people want to avoid wrinkles
even though everyone gets wrinkles.
- Yeah, for me, it's about looking in the mirror
and not really recognizing the person there anymore
because with hairline and hair thickness,
like, it changes the shape of your face (laughs).
It really does.
And then, also like I tried to just run with it
and I was like "Okay, I'm gonna be
"One of those cool shaved head guys."
I did a zero all over.
- [Melanie] Oh yeah, you look so hot
with the shaved head I loved it.
- Like everyone said, it suited me,
and I looked in the mirror and I was like,
yeah, kind of does suit me as well.
But at the same time I still didn't feel
like I looked like myself.
You know, I missed just having the quiff.
I missed just having a bit of extra thickness.
Like for me, it's not really about the hairline
it's more of the fact that you can see through it.
- Do men say comments to each other?
Like, do people say things to you?
- Well, I was going into work one day
and it was a particularly wet day,
and, where the lads in the office called me Dr. Phil.
Like it was really funny.
(Melanie laughing)
I didn't appreciate it.
Once I kind of accepted these issues
and was open enough to talking to my friends about them.
Quite a few of them were instantly like,
"I know, like I'm like that as well.
"Like look at this and look at that."
Like, and I realized these guys who I saw everyday
who I thought were like really confident,
who had no issues with this type of stuff
were the exact same as me.
And were so excited to talk about it
just because I brought it up.
- I remember a friend of mine Riyadh
made a YouTube video about his dad
getting a hair transplant. - Oh yeah.
- We're gonna do a little chat now for a video
and I'll do with Melanie tomorrow isn't that right?
- Right?
- It's not, to do with Melanie at all actually.
- Oh dear.
- Not at all.
- Yeah, that is shit.
- No, it's actually about you.
- What?
- You remember we went for the consultation for your hair?
- Oh yeah.
- Yeah, we're going to get it done as a gift for you.
- What? Oh really?
- Yeah.
- Oh shit.
(both laughing)
Really?
- Yeah.
- No way.
- Absolutely yeah.
- That was the first time I really like thought
the fact that like, yeah,
guys go and do this all the time.
And not even celebrities like footballers
and news presenters and it's become really common
but it's not talked about much.
It's actually quite similar I feel like
in my world, in my Internet bubble
of like a lot of people get fillers.
And I've never had anything, any cosmetic procedures
done to my face other than the acne scar treatment.
But, so many other people like, they'll get fillers
in their faces and in their lips and stuff,
but then they'll not talk about it.
And then I feel like that kinda sets this unrealistic like,
- Expectation.
- Yeah, with the hair transplant stuff that you told me,
when he finally told me that he had an insecurity
about his hair, he told me that you've been looking
into getting a hair transplant and you're like,
"I'm definitely getting one, I'm getting one
"It's just no question about it."
- Yeah, the biggest, yeah, I was just,
it was a question of when rather than if.
I had been looking into it
like from probably my early twenties, I was kinda convinced.
Yeah, when I am in a position to be able to get this
I'm going to do it because this isn't going away.
I just want to look like me,
like the me that I see in my head, I want to see him again.
Getting the hair transplant,
it's just getting the top of my head
just looking the way it did like five years ago.
Which would be great because then I'd feel
a bit more like myself when I look in the mirror
and not like, I don't know,
I just feel like I look different.
I don't think I look bad, I think I just look different.
- Like it doesn't affect how I view you
and no one thinks any less of you,
for your hair being thinner and stuff.
But you, the way you explained it to me it's like,
it's not about that it's about yourself
and your inner kinda, sort of low self image
or self esteem about yourself.
So, you want to do it so that you're dealing with less
insecurity on a day-to-day basis?
- Well yeah, like, 'cause you have to listen to me (laughs).
'Cause I make comments on it probably every day.
- He does, yeah, he comments.
He sounds like, "I only have two hairs."
- And I don't realize that I do it as well.
- He calls himself Homer Simpson, all the time.
- I try and make jokes out of it just to kinda deal with it.
But, like it does really bother me.
- So, anyway because he was just constantly bringing them
and bringing them. (Thomas laughing)
He always said he would get it done in his forties,
which is when most men do,
tend to go and get a hair transplant.
But, so our wedding obviously wasn't able to go ahead
with COVID and stuff like that.
We did get married, but we didn't have
like the whole big, big wedding and stuff.
And then, I just remember during the whole lockdown
and all those, trying to like have things
for both of us to look forward to and stuff.
And because you're thirtieth is next year,
I surprised him and I said like,
"Look, I'll do this for you if you would like to do it."
And you were very, very, very happy (laughs).
- I was so shocked as well.
I know a lot of people kinda go abroad
to save a bit of cash.
But I have seen quite a lot of horror stories online.
- Oh yeah, same.
- And, over the course of the years and me looking into it,
this same name always kept coming up.
It was Hair Restoration BlackRock,
which was where Riyadh went, When we were talking
about Riyadh's dad. - Yeah, his dad did.
- Like they went down there.
Yeah, I feel like I've like 10 years of research
towards this place now,
like, they're fully accredited.
Loads of celebs have been there and they've trusted them.
It's a company that specialize in hair loss treatments.
So they really do know what they're talking about
and people fly in from all over the world
to go to this place, and it's only down the road. So,
- And they're very private like when we went in there first,
you did a consultation with,
and they do consultation with actual doctors as well.
- Yeah.
- And they'll dissuade you from getting a hair transplant
if you don't need one.
And so they really look out for like the people who go there
but, they're really private in that.
So, so many men are so like private
about getting this stuff done, which makes me really sad.
And that's kind of why, a big reason we wanted
to talk about this in a video
because, they have it set up so that the men don't have
to bump into anyone on their way in and out.
- You will not.
- Which is amazing.
But I wish they didn't have to do that (laughs).
- Yeah, you will not see another patient
when you're in there.
Like you're brought through the hall when it's clear
and they're brought through the hall
when you're safely in your room.
- Yeah.
- And I can completely understand
why guys would be delighted with that (laughs)
to be honest with you.
So I first off went in for a consultation
and got some photos taken of my hair and that type of thing.
And they kinda asked me questions about
what I was having the biggest issue with.
Which was, as I said my thickness,
the thickness of the hair.
- See girls can just go and put in hair extensions.
(Thomas laughing)
You know, and what they do by the way
is they take hairs from back here,
and then they'll put them in here.
So it's not like they're getting some random person's hair
and putting it into your head or like fake hair.
It's like your, it's your own hair that they're moving.
But, you did that like with the pictures and all that
and then you went in for what was it? Design process.
- So during the design process,
they look at what size or transplant you're looking for.
So based on your financial situation and also your needs
they'll decide what kind of package suits you. And then--
- There's different types,
there's two different types isn't there?
- Yeah, so there's FUE and there's FUT.
But yeah, so they draw a line in your head (laughs)
which just looks a bit mental.
But, I was really shocked as well about
how much hairline they were gonna be able to give me back
because that wasn't even
one of the things I was looking for.
- But they stagger it though, right?
It's not like that line.
Like they don't just put it on like that
they make it look very natural.
- It's not like a doll's hair.
They're basically, what they say is
if I was to lose all the rest of my hair,
it will still look natural, which is good.
You know, so in 20, 30 years time,
when lots of my other hairs will falling out,
I won't be left with like a patch
and then like, nothing behind it.
Like it'll be, it'll look natural.
So I'm getting it done in December.
It's all booked in.
This is crazy, I can't wait (laughs).
- You're so excited about it.
It's gonna be me after a few kids,
when I'm getting my first boob lift.
(both laughing)
I'll be like this.
I do think that's a big element of confidence as well
in, it's being open and transparent
about your insecurities and stuff.
Do you know what I mean?
Like it's, it's very difficult
to get to the point where you can talk about this stuff.
So I think it says a lot about a person,
especially a man to have the courage
to talk about this stuff.
'Cause I think that it takes a lot of bravery
to be like, "Oh yeah, no, I'm insecure about this.
"I'm gonna do something about it."
Like so many people will be so insecure about it
that they wouldn't even like, you know?
- Acknowledge it.
- Yeah like, I know there's just so many guys
I've known with like, issues that they just,
it's like it cripples them.
Like, you know what I mean?
And, I really, I'm so glad that
you'd talk about this with me,
and not just with me but like online.
Because, even if like five or 10 people watching this
or see this through their girlfriends or their whatever like
and feel, I don't know, a bit more heard or seen.
- Yeah, no I definitely think it's a lot,
it's an issue that a lot of men deal with.
A lot of other lads like, they lose their hair
and they're just like,
"Cool, this is what I look like now. Great."
But, I just don't have that, I just,
I have an image of myself in my head
and I miss it, you know.
So, I have the opportunity to get it back,
so I'm gonna to take it.