Today we stop, drop, and roll that clip!
Let's talk about that.
( music playing )
Good mythical morning!
This is our last week of Season 13
which means Friday is our finale!
After that, we're going to be taking a short three week break
and then we'll be back on May 28th for
- our Good Mythical Summer. - Summer!
- But our season ain't over yet. No. - Nope.
Today we're gonna see if we can tell the difference between
designer gowns and Forever 21 dresses.
And then we're gonna look at some of the worst yearbook quotes ever.
Mm-hmm, but first, the internet is filled with people who do dumb things,
like eat Tide Pods, put salt and ice on their skin,
- and drink their best friend's urine. - Oh, who would do that?
But there's a whole other world of dumb on the internet.
And that is pyromaniacs.
These are people who love to set things on fire,
( raspy voice ) just to see how it will burn.
They may be stupid, but they're very entertaining.
Both: It's time for...
( tune of "Ring of Fire" )
All right, here's how this is gonna work.
We're gonna look at a video of someone
who is about to light something on fire.
We have to guess between two options
of how exactly that thing will burn.
We're gonna be working together as a team
so we have to agree on our prediction of what's gonna happen.
If we don't get the majority of these right,
we will be punished with our very own
- bag of flaming dog poop. - Whoo!
All right, let's get going with the first one.
Okay, we have them on cards here 'cause we have no clue
what's coming, but the first one is
"A pyromaniac who decided to light his balls on fire."
- Okay. Good. - Seriously?
"YouTube channel, The Action Lab,
uploaded a video where he attempts to set fire
to a bucket filled with 100 ping pong balls."
- Okay. Let's see it. - Okay.
( loud rattling )
Lighting our 100 ping pong balls on fire.
Okay, three, two, one...
Nicely groomed lawn. The options that we are given to choose from
are, "A, is it going to disintegrate the balls
into tiny charred morsels like both of us after our vasectomies?"
- Hey, that's not what happened. - That's not how it works.
- ( laughter ) - It's a common misconception!
Didn't you watch the unedited video?
- I can prove it! - I know you did, Kevin.
It's awkward, but you watched it.
"B, slowly melting the balls
like Stedman once he started dating Oprah."
- ( laughter ) - Over time,
- she's just melting his balls down. - Yeah, yeah she is.
- She's hot! - Disintegrate into charred morsels,
or slowly melt?
Their--it's plastic. I've seen plastic burn before.
And it--it turns black.
- They eventually become-- - I thought they'd slowly melt.
they become tiny charred morsels at the end.
It seems like we're saying A and B. We have to choose.
I think they're gonna slowly melt. I don't think they're
- gonna disintegrate. - Plastic does melt. Okay, B.
- B is our answer. - We're going with B. Let's see what happened.
And there goes one...
We have some holes in the bottom to bring in the air.
- Man: Whoa! ( chuckles ) - Rhett:
- Link:
( blows at fire ) All gone.
I think that's tiny charred morsels.
Yeah, but they slowly melted at some point
before-- okay, whatever.
All right, we got that one wrong, that's on me.
All right, Round Two.
- Mm-hmm. - "YouTube user, Hard the Test,
bought a brand-new iPhone and strapped it
- to fireworks." - Okay.
- Great idea! Let's see what happens. - The old...
destroying a highly valuable object for views.
- Yes, we've never done that. - Love it. Goodness.
( lighter flicks )
( fuse hisses )
What? Uh, now a couple of observations right off the bat.
( splutters ) Did you see how close the camera was to that?
Before it cut to the camera, it was a camera filming the camera.
- And then it's three freakin' sticks of-- - It's not dynamite.
What--it looks like dynamite.
- It's fireworks. - Well, it looks like dynamite.
Here's the options: "Is this going to, A,
explode into a bazillion pieces like Mark Zuckerberg
when he was trying to understand human love?"
( sputters )
"Or B, remain mostly unscathed like Tom Cruise
in every 'Mission Impossible' movie,
no matter how many times his motorcycle explodes?"
Mmm. He is a resilient man.
Here's what I'll say-- this is not personal experience,
but I remember one of my teenage friends
when I was growing up told me, "Listen, as long as you don't
put your fist around a firework,
you'll be all right, man."
- ( laughter ) - Somebody told you that?
Yeah. Like a guy we went to high school with.
I don't remember exactly who it was, so I'm not gonna name any names.
But basically we were talking about people
who had lost their fingers in fireworks accidents.
He's like, "If you just hold it like this--"
It's a common conversation topic.
"If you hold it like this, nothin'll happen."
So because the iPhone isn't holding,
but it's just next to it,
I'm almost positive that it is "B,"
it is not going to break into a million pieces.
But that's just based on one redneck from Harnett Central.
- ( laughter ) - Not a million--
So, I could be wrong.
- And it's not a million, it's a bazillion pieces. - Yeah, yeah, yeah.
There's no way that could be broken into a bazillion pieces.
All right, I'm gonna go with you since I was wrong on the last one.
- B. Let's see. - Okay.
Aah!
Link:
Nope, it's right over there.
Rhett:
- Link:
- Mostly unscathed. - Well, except for that big black streak in the middle.
I'm tellin' ya, man, rednecks--you can trust a redneck, man.
They tell ya something about fireworks,
you can take it to the freakin' bank!
- We got that one right! - What else we got?
Let's move on to this next one. Our prompt is...
"YouTuber, Mr. Gear,
decided to put a blowtorch against an unopened bottle
of champagne." All right, let's watch it.
Ah, so like concentrated fire...
- I love the internet. - ...in one spot.
That's one thing I'm reminded of.
- Because you--okay, here are our options. - I love that this stuff
happens on the internet.
"Is this champagne bottle going to, A,
blow its top and crack like Gordon Ramsay
when the stuffed pork tenderloin was raw in the center?"
Hmmm.
He's a volatile person.
It's all an act.
"Or B, tip over and fall to the ground
like that guy who's been drinking alone
at the TGI Fridays bar since two in the afternoon?"
Tip over?
- Uh...I think-- - So what you're saying is--
I don't think it's going to build up enough pressure
to pop the top-- well, of course, he has unfurled the top.
It doesn't have a cage on it anymore.
I hope it blows its top. And cracks.
Because it's going to start to boil the champagne?
Is it going to melt the glass or... boil the champagne?
- It's not going to boil the champagne. - Before it melts the glass?
Is it gonna increase the pressure of the champagne such that
the pop tops off? The top pops off? Whatever.
- A. - Yeah.
- That's what you're saying? A? - I'm hoping it's A.
So, I hope this is wish fulfillment. Is it A?
- Rhett:
- Link:
And then it made the hole in the side after it bursted.
So that's it. We got that one right.
- That was a bottle of Odessa Gold. - Odessa.
- You know I-- - Can't believe he "dessagrated" it.
My poppa had a sister named Odessa.
- Are you making that up? - No.
Oh, wow. Did she start a champagne company?
Why would I make it up? It's not even worth making up.
Well...
- Okay. - ( laughs )
"There is a thing called a 'fire extinguisher ball'
which is something you throw into a fire to help it...
- go out." - Have you heard of this?
- Uh, naw. I'm just reading off of this. - ( laughter )
I know, but I had not heard of that.
"The guy behind the YouTube channel, What's Inside!--"
- I've seen that channel. - Cool.
Always cuttin' stuff open.
"...lit one on fire while holding it in his hand."
- Open hand, redneck fashion? - Well, let's see.
I'm just waiting for it to blow up right now. ( chuckles )
"Is it A, going to split open and release
streaks of foam, like my uncle Daryl
after doing the Tide Pod challenge?"
- ( laughs ) - Oy.
"Or B, explode like my uncle Daryl after challenging himself
to eat 20 Jack in the Box tacos?"
- You know uncle Daryl. - I think it's gonna release foam,
- because that's what's gonna extinguish the fire. - Yeah, yeah.
- It's supposed to come in contact with fire. - It's not going to explode.
- I'm pretty certain about this. A. - A.
- But it's kind of crazy he's holding it. - Yes.
Rhett:
Link:
- ( applause ) - Link:
- Child: You did not-- you didn't lose any fingers. - No, it felt like
someone smacked me so hard, though.
- Great work, Dad. - ( laughter )
We got the kid on the camera? What in the world?
That's a model father if I've ever seen one. And who am I to talk?
So we are 50/50 leading into this one.
"YouTuber, 76hotrodF250--"
- That's a good user name. - ( laughter )
I like it.
"--took his frustrations out on a Tickle Me Elmo"?
( chattering )
- He's putting a lighter in his mouth. - Oh, my gosh.
- Ah, he deserves it. - "Is this Tickle Me Elmo
going to burn and A, make loud popping noises
and spark all over the place like that time I accidentally
made Jiffy Pop in the microwave?"
Yeah, don't do that.
"Or B, keep on talking and laughing even in the face of death,
like that annoying co-worker with no self-awareness?"
Just let me get my work done, Jessie!
- Huh. Jessie. - You work with my wife?
- ( laughter ) - I don't know. That's they wrote.
You and my wife got a business together I don't know about?
- Yeah, we're a...um... - 'Cause she's the only person named Jessie!
We take two-sided tape, and we make it just tape.
- Okay. - ( laughter )
I don't think that's gonna work.
Um...
- Loud popping noises-- - I mean, it's got electronics in it,
so loud popping noises is sparking all over the place.
I think these things-- Elmo is so annoying...
that I think that that is the kind of thing that would just break through
any sort of hardship.
I think he's gonna continue to laugh and talk
as he disintegrates.
Sparking and that? That's for the movies, man.
- That doesn't happen in the real world. - Good point.
Both: B.
Link:
- ( electric whirring ) - ( laughs ) Elmo's got it!
If Elmo doesn't get his nose back,
Elmo has to talk like this all day.
( laughs )
( farts ) Excuse Elmo.
( laughs )
( crackling )
- Woo-hoo-hoo! -
( sizzling )
- Wow. He-- - ( laughter )
He kept going!
- That-- - That was satisfying to watch.
That--
- I don't like Elmo, man. - I don't--I'm not--
I'm not comfortable being around someone
who relished so much in that. That was wicked!
Elmo does not have a friend in me.
- No, no, no. - Well, I'm just saying
it was like--I mean, he like farted and said "Excuse me."
Were things coming out of him that without the fire
- he wouldn't have said? - I don't think he knew he was on fire.
- I don't think that's how it works. Okay, Link... - Oh, gosh.
- One more. If we get this one right... - Yes!
we don't have to expose ourselves...
- to that flaming dog of-- - ( laughter )
flaming bag of dog poo. Okay.
"The 386th Expeditionary Civil Engineer Squadron
conducted a burn to dispose of 18,974 pieces
of unserviceable ammunition."
- Let's see what happened. - Oh, no.
Link:
How is this a good idea?
- What are our options? - I should've never left civil engineering.
Okay, "Is it going to end in a very underwhelming display
like the night I got married?" Oh, come on!
( laughter )
( laughs )
- "Or put on--" - It's well-documented.
"Or put on--" ( chuckles ) No, it wasn't documented.
Thank goodness. "Put on one heck of a firework show
like Aunt Debbie after she's had one too many vodka cranberries?"
Well, it says "unserviceable."
So they wouldn't be burning it if it would go up,
but they wouldn't put it at the end of this segment
- if it was a dud. - Oh! Now you're playing the psychological game.
- The producer. The producer. - How they're thinking about it.
So even though I was gonna think that they're just inert--
'cause I think that they're out in the desert
and this thing's gonna go kaplooie.
Why would they burn that much ammunition
if it was unserviceable. Why don't you just--
That's a question for them that we are not gonna be able to answer.
I don't think that it's a fireworks show.
- I think it's-- - It's a fireworks show, man!
Because of what? Because of the producer in you?
Yes.
- Okay, if-- - I wanna see it bad.
How 'bout this, how 'bout this?
Whoever is wrong has to stick his nose in the dog poop.
- That's fine. - Has to open it up
- and get your face in it. - That's fine.
I'm going with "It was underwhelming,"
and I'm willing to put my nose in there
knowing there's a good chance I'm wrong.
All right. Here it is, right here.
All right. Let's watch.
- So nothing happened. Nothing happened at all. - Whoa!
- Kaplooie, baby! - That's totally inert.
You put the right music underneath that,
and boy, it's almost patriotic. Which is odd.
All right, there you go.
- There's Flaming Hot Cheetos in there. - Kaplooie!
What? Dump it out.
Oh, gosh!
( clatters )
Ugh!
It's--
Flaming Hot Cheeto covered--
Ugh!
- What dog donated that? - ( laughter )
It's real poop, man.
- Oh, my gosh. - Nothing but the best for us.
- Ugh! - Okay.
You earned it.
Now stick around to see if we can tell the difference
between designer gowns and dresses from Forever 21.
Rhett:
We're taking the Tour of Mythicality to Australia in July.
Get tickets and details on the VIP package
at TourOfMythicality.com.