It's a huge misconception that more talking equals better communication. Well
I'm here to tell you that effective listening is often exactly what you need
to become a better communicator. So we're going to talk about six tips to make you
a more effective listener.
Hello again friends. Welcome back. I'm Alex Lyon.
If we have not met yet, this channel is all about helping you,
a rising leader, become a more effective leader so that you can bring out the
best and all the people around you. And today we're going after effective
listening skills. I have another related video that I'll link to in the card
above or the description below about the barriers to effective listening. But in
this video, we're gonna take it a step further and look at ways to build up
your positive skills. And the bottom line for great listening is feedback. You as a
listener are trying to give whoever is speaking positive feedback that will
help them know that you are listening. And by doing that and making that your
focus, you will become a better listener. So the first tip is non verbal feedback.
Now when people are listening closely to you, they're doing things like making eye
contact. They're nodding and they're showing you through their facial
expression that they're paying attention to what you're saying. Now I'm not
suggesting that you necessarily fake this but if you take a genuine interest
in what they're doing you want to make sure you show it. Now the alternative is
and you've probably seen this people give you like a stone face. They have
this neutral or blank expression on their face and it doesn't really seem
like they're listening. It seems like they're judging you. So you want to be
aware of your facial expression and you want to give positive nonverbals that
show that you are listening to them. That's good feedback. the second tip is
verbal feedback and you want to keep this pretty compressed. So as the person
is talking at the right moment you say things like I hear you or I know where
you're coming from or that makes sense. Some kind of short verbal utterance that
shows them gives them feedback, that you are listening to then. It could be as
short as uh-huh yeah. Even that alone gives them a cue
that you are paying attention to what they are saying. Now the next tip is to
listen to the big picture. This is a huge effective listening tip because a lot of
times we get so caught up in the details, in fact, this is a barrier to effective
listening in the other video I mentioned, but you want to listen to the
big picture and that'll help you stay focused on what they're saying, not the
details so much. And if you're in a content or a work-related setting, you're
listening for the overall idea the big- picture idea and if you're in a social
situation talking to a friend and so forth you want to listen to the big-
picture emotion. So let's say they're frustrated or they're happy you want to
connect with that emotion and when you're listening to that big picture
emotion you're going to show them that you're interested and be much more
focused and tracking with what they are saying. The next tip is you want to stay
on them. and what I mean by stay on them is keep the conversation focused on them
as a person and also focus on their topic. So you might have an occasion to
jump in and say something. Be sure that you don't take over the conversation and
all the sudden make it about you and make it about the topic that you really
want to be talking about. that's not good listening. Now, that might be good talking,
but in this video we're working on good listening. So stay on them. The next tip
is when you do have the occasion to talk make sure that you're talking turn is
concise. So you want to say whatever you have to say and it's completely
appropriate while you're listening to chime in and add a sentence or two here
or there but make sure it's concise, like limited to about a sentence and then
bounce it back onto them. Ask a follow-up question. Probe into something
they just said so you give your opinion then you bounce it and ask them another
question. That'll help the conversation stay on them. It'll make you a more
effective listener. And the last tip is like the gold star bonus tip of the
whole video. Take action. A lot of times people miss out on this easy opportunity.
If you're in a professional setting you want to let the person know what you're
going to do about it. They shared some information,
say okay I'm gonna follow up. And then follow up with an email or send them
something that they asked for. And if you're in a social situation one of a
really classy move that shows that you care about the person is you follow up
with them the next time. So then the next time you touch base with them or see
them you say, hey say by the way whatever happened with a situation at work? Or how
did that work out with your dog? Is she's still sick?
You follow up. Maybe you follow up by sending them a text may be followed by
sending them an email or something on social media. But that follow up is
really what's gonna take your listening to the next level because that shows
them that you care. That's feedback that shows them you were in fact listening
and you get a lot of credit for that follow up. So those are six tips to more
effective listening skills. Question of the day. which one of these do you
struggle with the most and which one of these do you think you're naturally best
at? I would like to hear both sides of that coin and I look forward to reading
your comments in that section below. So thanks. God bless. And I will see you in
the next video.