- Where'd you get those sunglasses?
Did they come with the car?
- These are from your mom.
(upbeat music)
Special occasion.
I eat fish.
- I understand you eat the fish.
But when you clean the fish,
you can't just leave the fish head and guts and (bleep)
in the sink.
Because the whole house smells like a bait station.
So you got to put it in the trash,
and then take the trash out.
Do you understand?
- Yes. I eat the fish.
- Mother(bleep)!
Jian-Yang.
- [Jian-Yang] Erlich Bachman.
Is your refrigerator running?
This is Mike (bleep).
- Hello?
- [Jian-Yang] Erlich Bachman,
this is your mom,
and you are not my baby.
- Not now, Jian-Yang, not now!
Go back into your room!
Have some compassion.
I mean, the guy rented his place
to some (bleep) kid tenant
who won't leave.
Jared is (bleep), Jian-Yang.
- He can go to court.
- Of course he's going to go to court.
You four-eyed turd.
But in America, the legal system doesn't work very well.
So it'll take at least a year for the proceedings
to even begin. Do you understand that?
- Yes. I stay here for one year.
I pay no rent.
You have no recourse.
- That's not always the case.
I mean, sometimes court systems can move faster,
especially if you have the money for it -
- [Jian-Yang] I'm going to smoke in my room.
Does anybody have an extra ticket?
My investor cannot pay.
- That's actually not true.
I think they must have misplaced the tickets.
- No, we have everyone's tickets here.
- Can you please check? Erlich Bachman.
E-R-I-C-A-R-
- That's not at all how it's spelt here.
- Let's go, Jian.
- Hey, Jian-Yang. How was last night?
- It was sad.
Erlich, he promised me dinner with a big meat.
- Big meat?
- Big meat people.
- Meat people?
- Then, people say no. You can't come in.
- Wait, so you guys didn't get in?
- We went to Taco Bell.
- [Erlich] Richard, I expect you off the premises
by end of day.
Monica.
- I'll see you later. - Okay.
- You know you can stay here for one year, free rent.
- [Erlich] (yelling) Jian-Yang!
- You're not seriously thinking of going to Tibet?
- [Bertram] You're broke.
- [Erlich] My great friends,
I figured we might pass the hat.
Just give whatever you're comfortable with.
- I'll pay for it. Whatever it costs.
- Well, it seems the smallest of us has the biggest heart.
Thank you, young Jian-athon.
Business class?
- Premium economy.
You fly one way.
- Don't you need a visa to go to China?
- Yes. I can call my uncle in Beijing.
He's a very corrupt. - That's what Big Head said.
This play has to do with the Oculus, right?
- No.
- But he said, that you said Oculus.
He said you kept saying it. Oculus, Oculus, Oculus.
- Octopus.
- No.
Octopus?
- It's a water animal.
- I know what an octopus is.
Just, what does your application have to do with octopus?
- Eight different ways to make a Chinese recipe octopus.
Question for you.
What's better than octopus recipe?
Answer for you.
Eight recipes for octopus.
- Go for Erlich.
- [Jian-Yang] Erlich Bachman, this is you as an old man.
I'm ugly and I'm dead. Alone.
- I'm going to let him have this one.
All right, well I'm sorry to hear that future me.
What a terrible thing. I'll talk to you in several years.
- [Erlich] This is the quite the baby shower.
What you think you're some big swinging (bleep)
now that you're getting invited to all these
fancy VC soirées?
- [Jian-Yang] Yes, my (bleep) is very enormous.
And my aunt made Raviga a lot of money.
And I still pay no rent.
- Nobody likes a braggart, Jian-Yang.
- Hey guys.
- Hello, congratulations. You're pregnant.
- [Erlich] No, no, no. No, she's, no. No, no.
- Stupid Erlich. Big mortgage, seven credit cards,
not even one with miles.
- (bleep) loser.
- Dinesh, you like this?
- Jesus (bleep) Christ!
Is that a dead pig?
- [Jian-Yang] Yes. It's just like Erlich.
My corrupt uncle sent a death certificate from China
but to send body is too expensive, so I cremate a pig.
Because a pig is the most like a fat human.
- Erlich Bachman is dead.
(heavy tub bangs on lectern)
- Mr Jian, there's absolutely no need
to display the deceased remains.
You can put that away.
- I have it.
- Yes, please put it down.
- Erlich Bachman is cremated into ashes
and I put it in bucket.
- Jian-Yang, what is going on here?
- All girls coding camp.
I support woman.
- Mr Erlich, I'm finished.
- This diet cream helped my husband lose weight,
he was fuck (bleep), now he not. Five star. The end.
- I wrote exactly like Mr. Erlich told me to.
- It's very good, Sophie.
Very good.
- You're using underage girls as slave labor
for a fake Amazon review farm?
- Yes.
- And you're using the Pied Piper name?
- Yes.
It's okay. I have money.
- Girls! Call your parents.
- You need to pay all of his outstanding bills.
- How much do I have to pay?
- Well, these debts can sometimes be substantial.
Would you characterize Mr. Bachman
as a financially responsible man?
- Erlich is gone.
This is my incubator now.
- What?
- Your things are over there.
- [Dinesh] What the (bleep)?
- Gilfoyle, you are racist.
And Richard, you are ugly.
The Erlich administration is over.
- What? - What the (bleep)?
You can't just kick us out, Jian-Yang.
- Sorry. You are victims of a circumstance.
(bleep) you, Erlich.