[One]
What do I do at 11 p.m. on the toilet every night?
Have a ****!
No!
[Music]
We have scoured the UK for what we think is your biggest fan.
Hello big fan!
Hello Steve.
Hi Gemma.
Steve, firstly I want to thank you for being a fan.
Sorry, I'm a bit nervous.
[Gemma] Don't be nervous, I understand. I'd be the same if I was talking to Madonna or Mariah Carey.
[Scott] It's exactly the same as that.
I know you're in shock, I know this is just
such a big moment for you.
I want you to take on me as a spirit animal right now
because this is a quiz of a lifetime.
You are playing it with your biggest,
you know...inspiration.
Are you okay Steve?
Yes.
We're going to do a quiz now. If you know the answer first you shout your name, which is...
Gemma!
And if you know the answer first Steve, you shout...
Steve.
[Gemma] Let's go for it Steve. [Scott] Okay, let's do it.
[Scott] Here we go.
What is the name of Gemma's podcast?
Steve.
Yes.
The Gemma Collins Podcast.
[Scott] Correct! [Gemma] Yes Steve, well done!
Shall I let Steve win?
No no you just... no.
Steve.
Yes?
[Steve]. I'm going to win. [Scott]. Okay, cool.
Next question, what does TOWIE stand for?
Steve.
Yep.
The Only Way Is Essex.
[Scott]. Correct. [Gemma]. Well done Steve!
Before Gemma appeared in TOWIE, what was her job?
Yeah, what was me job?
Steve. Avon.
No, I was a car sales extraordinaire.
Avon.
[Scott]. No, it's not Avon, no we've established that.
Finish this famous GC quote, "You ain't ever gonna get this..."
Candy.
You need to say your name first.
Steve. You need to say your name.
Yep.
Gemma.
Steve.
I'm so confused.
I want Steve to win though, it's Christmas.
[Scott]. All right, okay.
What was the answer Steve?
Candy.
Well done Steve!
Name five reality programs Gemma's appeared on.
Steve.
Yeah.
TOWIE.
Steve. Dancing On Ice.
Steve. Crimewatch.
Steve. Celebs Go Dating.
Steve. Splash. Five.
Here Steve, can I just ask, what did I do on Crimewatch me darling?
Steve. Masterchef.
[Scott]. Yeah, not Crimewatch. [Gemma] Yeah, I weren't on Crimewatch.
No?
No.
Celebrity Crimewatch.
[Scott] No.
Oh yeah, no I've not done that one me darling but don't worry, well done.
Yeah, okay next. What does Gemma do every night at 11pm on the toilet?
Steve.
Yeah.
Yeah, what do I do at 11 p.m. on the toilet every night?
Have a ****!
No!
Smoke a fag! That's all right.
You can't say that Steve.
Look, you are a superfan – no keep it in an bleep it out, it's funny!
[Steve] ***! [Scott] NO STEVE!
What was the name of Gemma's pony...?
Curls one out.
What shall we do? Okay.
What was the name of Gemma's pony from Celebrity...?
Steve.
Yes.
Tony.
Tony the pony.
What did Gemma say to Arg when they rekindled their romance in 2017?
Steve.
Yes, Steve.
Yep?
To be, or not to be, that is the question:
Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer
The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune,
Or to take arms against a sea of troubles
And by opposing
end them.
To die—to sleep,
No more; and by a sleep to say we end.
Okay Chris, stop now.
It's not a superfan called Steve.
You absolute ******!
Here I was... you *******...
thinking... beep this out...
that there was this superfan, that maybe was struggling with nerves,
worry, you know all them things
that people feel when they get to speak to me.
And I was being nice and I sort of just thought, nah!
I'm sorry, Gemma.
I was in shock but Chris...
But you've handled it extremely well!
Chris, do wanna come through and say hi? He's just next door!
Yeah, I'll come through and say hi.
Come on you sod!
Come on!
[Music]
Sorry! I've got to be honest, listen.
Not many people can fool me, but you did!
Take a seat.
At first I thought it was a superfan, genuinely.
I'm a superfan of sorts!
Nervous and stuff.
Yeah, well I thought you handled it very, very well.
It was the 'curling one out'!
I mean, I found that funny but because I know I'm being recorded I thought, best not laugh too much!
- Erm, well done Chris! - We've done it though!
For more great audio and video from the BBC, listen on Sounds watch on iPlayer. [Music]
[Music]