(bowl clangs) (egg cracks)
(pan sizzles)
(festive rock music)
- Hello and welcome to Sorted food.
It's that time of year again,
when retailers
are putting as much festivity into products,
as they possibly can.
Sometimes that brings wondrous joy to the world,
other times they just die hard.
- [Barry Mike And Jamie] Oh.
- Either way, I've gone and bought a whole bunch of them,
things that have intrigued us,
and we're gonna get our normals to taste test them,
and then we're going to ask them,
would you buy it? - He's never seen that film.
- True. I haven't. (all laugh)
Very violent isn't it?
- Can somebody explain the pyjamas?
- Well it's Christmas.
- Christmas pyjamas, mate. - Okay, cool, wicked.
Cool.
(festive music finale)
- Category number one, remove the blindfolds.
(bright festive music)
- It's Crisps. - Crisps.
- [Jamie] Crispmas. - (laughs) Crispmas.
I feel like I've had all the flavours of crisps already,
you know what I mean?
There's so many out there.
- Dozens.
(crisps crunch and munch)
- Ooh lovely.
- Guess the flavour.
- Stuffing flavoured? - Yeah.
- Try number B.
- Number B? - Try letter B.
(Barry laughs)
(crisps crunch and munch)
- Pigs in blankets?
- Pigs in blankets.
- It's a bit bacon-y.
- Powdery meat.
Yeah. Bacon-y.
- You could not be closer.
This actually has cooked meat powder in it,
as an ingredient.
Move on to C.
- [Barry] Salt n' vinegary, straight away,
in terms of, of the tang, but...
- More acidic. (crisps munch)
Mm. (munches) Tangy.
- Pure gut-feel,
point to your favourite,
if you could put one bowl out,
for your guests, this Christmas, in your household,
which of those three would it be?
- [Mike] Mine would be these.
- [Barry] Mine would be these.
- Interesting.
Very interesting. You're wrong.
(music ends)
Oh, posh as well.
(soft jangly guitar music)
- A was Turkey and Stuffing, by Iceland.
B was Iberico ham and fig,
from Waitrose.
- Is it? - Oh.
- Okay. We'll go back into that.
We did say bacon-y.
- Well it has actually got
cooked Iberico ham powder in it.
- Shut up. - Yes.
- C is Lidl's Lobster Cocktail.
- [Mike] Well, that is false advertising.
(Barry laughs)
- [Ben] It has actual crustaceans in it.
- They taste really nice. - Really nice.
- But they don't taste like lobster.
- So interestingly,
the turkey and stuffing flavour,
completely vegetarian and vegan.
It's just all of the flavours you associate
with turkey and stuffing.
- I find that so amazing that that's possible.
Like most bacon crisps, are vegan.
- The middle one,
the Iberico ham does have meat in it.
And the lobster cocktail does have crustaceans in it,
but A, the turkey and stuffing is actually vegetarian,
and is made in Scotland by Sally Taylor.
- Whoa. - Whoa .
Did not know she'd branched out that far.
(they giggle) - Wow.
- She lives on a farm with her husband, James-
- James Taylor? - and they grow
lady rosetta potatoes. And that's them.
- She even looks like your mum.
- (laughs) I know!
Mummy? (they laugh)
- Now we know that these are supposed to be the flavours,
they give a hint towards those,
those tastes, not necessarily those flavours.
And even with the lobster,
you go, okay. Yeah. I can kind of get
that it's quite lobster-y.
Either way. They're all,
They're all tasty.
- As it happens, the lobster cocktail,
they are 79p a bag, (register chimes)
Turkey and stuffing,
pound a bag, (register chimes)
and the Iberico ham and fig chutney crisps, £1.33.
So they're all pretty similar,
but actually from cheapest to most expensive,
they do double in price.
- Seeing as this is a review video,
and it's that time of year,
do we get to put a Sorted,
a Mike and Barry Sorted stamp of approval,
for Christmas crisps?
- Christmas crisp stamp of approval.
- So the Sorted Christmas crisp
stamp and seal of approval goes to,
Sally Taylor's turkey and stuffing crisps.
- You're welcome mum.
(jangly guitar music ends)
- Remove your blindfolds.
- Oh, hello. Yes.
- [Ben] Party's just started. - Oh-ho-ho-ho Merry Christmas,
Ebbers is here. - Very exciting.
- A B and C,
three festive offerings.
(Jazzy festive music)
- Oh, it's very sweet.
- [Ben] We've just served it over ice.
- It's very sweet.
- It's a liqueur. - Citrus-y.
- I think it's vodka.
Is it citrus-y or is it this?
- I don't know because- - Someone's put an orange-
- That's in my nose, when I drink it,
and it's confusing,
(orange slice slaps)
- [Barry] That really slapped. (laughs)
- I think it's orange-y, Clementine-y,
like that type of thing.
The type of thing that you would find
at the bottom of your stocking.
- Yes.
It looks like a stout or a Porter.
- Cheers. - Hmm.
- Oh. Hang on a second.
- Smells of chocolate instantly.
- Yup.
- It's almost cream soda-y. I like that.
- I quite like it. - It's fizzy.
- I could have this much.
- [Barry] Oh, okay.
- I wouldn't want any more.
- Cheers.
(glasses clink) - Cheers.
(festive jazzy music)
- I feel like this is
sparkling wine,
with Ribena added in,
so it's suitable for children.
- Do you think? - Mm.
- It's non, I feel like it's non-alcoholic.
- It could be non alcoholic,
or it's like dangerously imperceptibly alcoholic.
- Yeah. It tastes very sweet.
Like a candy.
- Yeah it's snakebite.
(they laugh)
Like it's kind of got that cider and-
- [Ben] Is it fancy snakebite?
- Honestly, that is so accurate.
- [Ben] A,
is a Clementine gin liqueur.
- Oh. Well played. - Gin liqueur.
- By M&S. - So close.
- [Ben] Now you wouldn't have got it in the glass,
but if you just tip it upside down,
carefully, not that. - Right.
Lid. - Oh.
It's gold infused is it?
- [Ben] And then tip it back up again.
You've got your snow globe,
and if you push the button on the bottom.
(all exclaim)
- It's even better.
That is good. Oh I like that.
- [Ben] B- - It's a Porter.
- Is Sainsbury's Christmas Porter.
So I chose a Porter because of its proximity.
Porter started, was kind of invented, in Shoreditch.
It's a very London based thing.
And this has got things like chocolate malt in it,
but also all sorts of Christmas spices.
- We got chocolate.
Didn't get like dark fruit, sweet plum.
- It's like sugar plum fairy,
meets dark chocolate.
- And C.
(bottle scrapes)
is also M&S' Let It Sloe fizz.
- [Both] Sloe Gin.
- Yes, that's exactly what it is.
It's sloe gin.
- [Ben] So it does have sloe in it,
but it also has strawberry, blackcurrant,
Blackberry and elderberry,
mixed with white wine and then carbonated.
- How alcoholic is it?
4%. Okay. - Nothing.
- It's a lovely worldly drink.
It's the sweetness and alcohol content
of kind of a fruit cider.
- Right. Okay.
- [Ben] Quick run across the prices.
The gin liqueur is £20 (register chimes)
for the bottle.
The Porter is £1.80 (register chimes)
and the sloe gin fizz,
with all the elderberries,
is £5 a bottle. (register chimes)
- Oh. - Super cheap and cheerful.
- I think they're all quite cheap and cheerful, actually.
I think the gin liqueur, at £20,
you can get a decent bottle of gin for £20,
but it won't light up.
(they laugh) - Yeah.
The Christmas-y angle actually adds to it.
It's not just novelty for novelty's sake.
Ebbers. We've made our decision.
It's pretty obvious,
but the Sorted seal of approval,
for Christmas booze category,
goes to the, oh, sorry.
The,
snow globe bedtime lamp.
That's also delicious Clementine gin.
- Liqueur. - Liqueur.
(bright festive music)
(festive mandolin music)
- [Ben] Next for the main affair.
- Ooh. Ebbers, what are we doing?
- [Ben] Turkey alternatives.
- Oh, straight away, I've got a waft of salmon.
- Take your blindfolds off.
You've got A, B and C.
- It's not.
- It is! - Is it?
- This one here. - Oh, hang on a second.
I thought there was three different things on this board.
No? Right, let me have a look across.
- Okay. Sure.
- Cheers.
- Apple stuffing.
Pork's the meat.
- Have some of the outside on its own,
'cause I'm also getting citrus.
I've been getting like orange-y
- [Barry] Orange-y. Yeah okay, I have that.
- Apricot with pork, pork stuffing.
- [Ben] I think fish is often associated perhaps more
with Christmas Eve, in this country,
but around the world,
fish is the main sort of centrepiece.
And if you're not necessarily eating meat,
white or red,
then fish might be an option. If you're a pescatarian,
- The white fish is almost sandwiching a piece of salmon.
Yeah, yeah yeah,
there's white fish either side of the salmon.
- I have to say, the cheesy sauce and the breadcrumbs
is really great.
I think this is a giant pig in blanket.
- Yeah.
- Tasty?
- Really nice.
You know, the ratio is not what I'm used to,
'cause usually, you get a lot more bacon to sausage,
but it's a very tasty sausage.
- It tastes of meat,
but I'm not sure whether it is,
because of the texture.
- [Barry] It's definitely meat,
I just think it's been filled out.
- [Jamie] It's bouncy.
- That a little bit on a plate of lots of stuff, I get,
but not as the star of the show.
- A, is Lidl's three game bird.
- That's embarrassing.
I said, turducken straight away.
And then you said pork,
and then I went, "No you're right".
- Duck breast, goose breast, Guinea fowl breast,
all rolled up with a pork apricot and apple stuffing.
You've got that bit right. Wrapped-
- That is not a victory.
That is not a victory.
- Wrapped in smoked streaky bacon,
and finished with a blood orange glaze.
- I mean. - It's definitely bird innit?
(they laugh)
- Of course, if we're being really fancy,
you could also roll it in the bacon,
Vac pack it, sous vide it, til perfect,
and then just like finish it in a really hot oven,
to keep that moisture in.
That's being really chef-y.
This is exactly that,
it's a very convenient hack,
that you can put on your centre table.
There's a trend this year,
to putting three things together,
because B is Iceland's three fish gratin,
with a white wine and cheddar sauce.
It has got lots of flavours,
all natural, like parsley, lovage,
mace, nutmeg, smoked haddock,
Cod and salmon.
- There's two very strong flavoured fish,
fighting each other,
and then a quite a plain one on top,
just for things work best in threes.
- (snorts) Things work best in threes,
and genuinely I think the sauce with it,
the cheddar, the white wine,
we've got some parsnip in there, mace, nutmeg.
These are really interesting flavours to pair with fish,
and maybe that's something we can take.
C is Asda's pig in blanket.
If that's the best bit of the meal,
why limit it to a side dish?
- I get that.
But I still think it's the side dish.
I think you could buy the big schlong of it,
and then cut it like we have here,
and serve everyone two or three of those,
instead of multiple pigs in blankets.
- And that's kind of what they suggest.
That is 10 servings.
Prime cuts of British pork.
- That's simple to make at home,
with sausage meat and you could therefore,
control the quality of your sausage meat.
- And if you wanted,
you could put some apricot and apple in it,
from A,
this should all be about,
what can we do this year, that's slightly different?
Working A to C on price,
they're all frozen items.
A is £9.99. (register chimes)
B is £7 (register chimes)
and C is five. (register chimes)
- That is very cheap.
That is ridiculously cheap, for three birds.
- With all of these supermarkets,
they have their own quality assurances,
and promises across their entire range,
of where they source their meat from.
It's all very transparent.
We're going to have to push you
for a joint Sorted stamp of approval
on the Turkey alternative this year.
- Out of the three products in front of us,
none of them get a seal of approval.
However, as concepts,
we are prepared to split our seal of approval,
across two catege...
(all laughing) - So formal.
- [Jamie] Two concepts.
- As a replacement for Turkey.
I think that the bird trio takes it,
but it's something that I'm, I'm going to make at home,
A pig in blanket.
(mysterious festive music)
- Oh, what a lovely looking package.
I wonder what it could be.
(paper ripping)
Well fa-la my la. (festive metal music)
It's only this year's Sorted Christmas gift.
That's 12 months subscription
to our game-changing meal packs app.
Sorted food apron,
and choice of one of our cookbooks.
And if that doesn't ding your dong merrily,
we've only whacked a festive discount on the lot as well.
There is very limited stock.
So if you want one of these in time for Christmas,
click the link below.
(festive metal music continues)
(festive jazz music)
- Final category, a little sweet treat to finish us off.
Lift the blindfold.
- Oh, okay. - Oh good.
- Oh, three very different sweet treats.
(chomping) Gingerbread,
and like caramel.
It's cinnamon-y. It's ginger-y.
It's a bit spiced.
- One of those Christmas-y-
- Mm. Spiced. - spiced lattes, you get.
- Gingerbread latte popcorn,
move on to B.
- [Barry] Really dark chocolate.
- It's nice dark chocolate.
Is it nicer than sort of a decent bar,
that I would buy from a supermarket,
of like 70% dark chocolate, 75%.
I'm not sure it is.
- [Both] Turkish delight.
- Oh that's a good Turkish delight.
- It's got nuts in it,
which you would associate with Turkish delight.
Look at it. Is it a pecan?
- A,
is Christmas pudding popcorn- - No it's not.
- by The Popcorn Shed
- Bit sweet.
- Oh, it's oh, I didn't know. Do you know what?
- Ah, crap, it is, isn't it.
- (laughs) Yes it is. - [Both] It's a mince pie.
- So it is the fruit, the alcohol,
the spices you associate with Christmas pudding.
- I hate my brain.
How did my brain do that?
- That's great.
- Sam and Laura,
cousins and founders of The Popcorn Shed,
they've been making it,
quite literally in a shed, since 2016,
have "always appreciated the humble popcorn snack,
and its power to enhance special moments with friends,
family and loved ones".
- Fair play. - I agree.
- And their Christmas pudding version
does exactly that at Christmas.
And again, you can make it yourself,
some caramel, some butter,
and all of those Christmas spices, you could DIY it.
- I buy quite a lot of- - That's brilliant.
- like gourmet popcorn,
and this is right up there with the leading brands.
It's very tasty.
- B is Love Coco's ginger bread chocolate.
You were bang on, it's 71% dark chocolate.
So you even got the percentage pretty much spot on,
but gingerbread.
- Okay. - No.
- If you eat the little bobbles, that's gingerbread, but.
- There's so much delicious,
quite fruity chocolate, occasionally.
- I've bought some stuff from Love Cocoa before,
It's great, because every bar you buy, they plant a tree.
- The founder, James Cadbury.
Great, great, great Grandfather was John Cadbury,
and he started the business a few years back,
to try and restart and re emulate the foundations,
and the good ethics that John Cadbury started,
over 200 years ago.
They planted over half a million trees last year.
- Yeah. That's cool.
- Um. What sort of business
did his great, great, great grandfather have?
- Cadbury.
- What do they make? - Chocolate.
- Well, now everyone knows.
(they snigger)
- C is Waitrose pomegranate Turkish delight with pistachio.
So taking away the rose water,
and adding in pomegranate, in a nice little gift box.
- Really, really nice.
Layers of pomegranate, yeah.
It's an intense pomegranate flavour.
- I'm not a big Turkish delight fan, but.
- [Barry] Neither am I, but I really like those ones.
That packs a punch.
- [Ben] Price wise,
the box of Christmas pudding, Popcorn Shed,
is £2.99. (register chimes)
The bar of gingerbread Love Cocoa chocolate,
is £3.20. (register chimes)
- Oh okay.
- And the Turkish delight, that is in fact, pomegranate,
is £6 a box. (register chimes)
Probably more of the gift market,
- Yep.
- From Waitrose.
- It's Christmas.
You might apportion a little bit more budget,
towards things that you wouldn't do
across the rest of the year, because it's Christmas.
And for that reason,
Are we going Sorted seal of approval on this?
- Yeah, I think so.
- Sorted seal of approval goes to-
- Christmas pudding popcorn.
- But tell your guests what it is before they eat it.
- (laughs) Which I think was exactly the same
with the crisps,
and arguably, the alcohol too.
And therefore it's over to you.
You know we love to hear what you think,
with those items in mind,
would you buy it?
Or would you DIY it.
- Plus, Ebbers has been buying
loads more Christmas food trends for us to try,
so make sure you check out the next episode,
in a few days time.
- And time is running out,
for you to grab your Pass It On: Live tickets.
We're doing three performances on one day.
It's the 16th of December.
Make sure you click the link below,
to get hold of your tickets,
because they are going fast.
- I would say, you're not gonna wanna miss this,
but I want to miss it.
- I want you to miss this,
because you don't want to miss this.
- Yeah. Yeah.
- Chaos.
(production card beeps)
- My favourite bit is when they take their blindfolds off,
try some food and then close their eyes.
(Ben and Jamie laugh)