Ladies and gentlemen,
getting to shoot an international travel show
that we call Conan Without Borders
has been one of the absolute highlights
of my career.
I love it. I really do love it.
It's also been a great way for me to hide my money
in banks all around the world.
Here are just a few highlights. Take a look.
These are everywhere.
This is a Cuban payphone that enables you to make a call,
and get your hair permed at the same time.
The only problem is it will only call
that phone.
You just don't see this anywhere else.
Whole row of just one product.
Vino Seco Sweet Wine El Mundo.
We cannot film here?
I don't need to, I was just wondering
if you had any um... um...
Vino Seco El Mundo. Do you have that?
Oh, here it is.
(singing in Spanish)
(speaking Korean)
Love you.
(speaking Korean)
This is my stick.
Are you going to do that with me?
Punish me with that stick.
Why you like it?
Stop it!
Stop liking it?
No, no. Stop.
You don't understand. My entire fantasy is a stern woman.
I don't like you.
Can I just say you're the best dressed soldier
I've ever seen in my life.
Yeah. Like a Janet Jackson backup dancer.
It's incredible.
He looks amazing.
You're in North Korea.
I'm in North Korea first.
I'm still in South Korea.
Oh, congratulations.
(Korean pop music)
Those gentlemen right there are sheep herders.
And I'm disappointed because they're dressed like bouncers.
From an East Indian disco.
(grandiose music)
See, this won't have that much drama.
Sona, your natural speaking voice
is driving them that way.
You're a great herder.
(children laugh)
Yeah!
Yes! He gets me!
What is your name?
David.
It was very nice to meet you.
If I'm done shooting maybe later on, I can come by.
You don't believe me?
Does your family know
that you meet strangers on the street,
and invite them up to your house for coffee?
Do they know about that?
I worry about you. I don't want you to do that.
I could be crazy, right? Look at me.
I could be crazy.
I see where this is going.
I'm okay with that.
The male echidna actually has
a four pronged penis.
Why?
Why not?
She's good.
[Announcer] Conan O'Brien!
Muchos gracias!
(speaking Spanish)
Trump said you would pay.
I will pay nothing. I put this.
Huh? No, you can't, no.
Oh Ghana, I want to wear a Ghana shirt.
What do you think?
Oh, it's too small.
Another big deal here in Ghana,
is having a fantasy coffin.
So this is someone who died of type two diabetes.
The great thing about this turkey coffin
is that you get to be the stuffing.
(men laugh)
Are you laughing because you like the joke
or just to be polite?
Polite.
(man coughs)
Oh, the cough at the end.
It's not the cough that carries you off,
it's the coffin they carry you off in.
I put in my special request.
A TV, so I can watch myself for all eternity.
Oh, thank you, death.
(German music plays)
Who hit me in the face?
What was that?
There are companies throughout Japan
that provides fake families
for people who are lonely.
I am back in my hotel room in Tokyo
and I have a family.
This is incredible.
Could you guys like ramen?
Yes, we do.
Not me. I like my men cooked.
Please tell them to laugh.
This is so much better.
I'm worried now that if I tell her,
oh I just came back from the doctor
and I only have a year to live.
(women laugh)
I'm here to buy your country.
Hi, here to buy your country.
Good evening, I'm Conan O'Brien
and I'm bringing you the latest weather report
here in Greenland.
(speaking foreign language)
There's cold stuff coming.
Limoncello!
When I'm walking around,
I like to yell out random Italian things, you know?
(speaking Italian)
You keep thinking it's offensive,
people just think that I'm Italian.
Ragu in a can!
Tell him I want a pumpkin spice latte.
What I like to do is drive around here.
I have very specific music that I like to listen to.
Guess what? I looked into it.
To play that music would cost us a lot of money.
I had the band make us up some music
that doesn't cost us anything.
(old time stereotypical Italian music plays)
You see, this sounds very stereotypical to me.
Almost to the point of insulting.
I brought some sound effects. You want to listen to those?
[Elephant trumpets]
But we can also have silence as well, if we want.
(crying baby sound plays)
Uh-oh. Oh the car stalled, huh?
Hold on.
(deflating slide whistle sound plays)
Can you stop the car for a second?
Stop it?
Yeah.
Just one other thing.
Yeah?
(fart noises play)
(epic music plays)
Two quick things.
When I did the weather in Greenland, that went out.
That was the weather report for Greenland that night.
And I walked around the whole next day
and people were like, what?
What was that?
That was a mess.
I really did run away on camera.
Cause I thought that was the only way out.
The other thing I wanted to mention is I went to Armenia
with my assistant Sona Movsesian.
I have to give Sona a big shout out.
She's been a big part of my life
these last 11 years.
And she is not working with us at the moment,
because any day now she will be giving birth to twins.
Oh! There she is!
Wait a minute! Wait a minute!
I didn't know you were here.
I thought you were being nice!
You told me you couldn't work,
but you can come out here and check the show out?
We love you Sona, and we're so excited for you
and thank you for everything.