People in Swellview start their careers early.
Did you get the job?
And Piper Hart is no exception.
This pedicure is over.
So let's check out the explosive career
of Swellview's most business savvy young woman.
I need to start posting better content.
Piper Hart has been a social media influencer
since day one.
Things are trending and I don't know what they are!
From pimple popping for views..
[groaning]
...to crashing exclusive photo ops.
You're going to get a picture of me with that wall.
Say, "Prune"!
Ah, doo doo bird!
No!
Did you get the pic? Tell me you got it.
Oh, we got it. Piper is one of the most dedicated influencers
in all of Swellview,
even if it results in some workplace injuries.
Doctor says she has text neck. It's caused by texting,
you know, looking down at screens all the time.
Piper's next big career move involved even more hazards.
Get your hands off Kid Danger!
[screaming]
It was here defending Kid Dangr from The Spoiler
that Piper proved herself
to be the biggest Man Fan in Swellview.
And now, I, Captain Man declare you Piper Hart,
the new president of the Man Fans.
[cheering]
And that's how she became the president
of the official Captain Man and Kid Danger Fan Club.
[horn blowing]
This meeting of the Man Fans can now begin.
Now, if you thought Piper's next job as life coach
would be less dangerous, you'd be wrong.
The secret is--
[groaning]
Why?!
I'm helping you learn to keep your secret by causing you pain
when you try to tell it.
And no, Jasper wasn't the only victim to her coachin.
You spanked me.
That's right. In life, sometimes you gotta just face your fears,
throw them over your lap and spank 'em,
like it's your job.
Not all of Piper's careers were so violent though.
Her next job was much more chill.
I'm Piper Hart. This is cold yoga.
I'm your instructor.
Let's start with a simple downward freezing dog.
Soon after, the City of Swellview granted
Piper a driver's license.
You can't keep this.
[scoffs] Yes, I can.
This came from the Swellview DMV to me.
So just stay out of my beazers.
That opened up a whole new career.
And how are you gonna get there?
I don't know.
I do.
Slow down!
Yeehoo!
Piper's driver's license would actually come in handy
several times throughout the coming years.
Lobby's right here. I just hit the truck he was in.
She saved my life!
[rock music playing]
[honking]
Get outta the way!
She hit me with her car.
Ooh, that's new.
Soon after her driver's license randomly arrived in the mail,
as did another job opportunity.
The problem is that I ordered a pink furry phone case
and you people sent me a spray tan gun!
Problem or profit?
What is happening in our house?
I'm giving people spray tans.
Why?
Because most spray tan places charge like 50 bucks.
Piper does it for 20.
That's right.
This was one of the many opportunities
that ended with a visit from the police.
It's illegal to run a tanning salon
without a license.
- Am I under arrest? - Yep.
Fortunately for Piper, her dad took the blame this time.
Piper eventually made her big break
when she was cast in a Fred Lobster commercial.
[speaking in a foreign language]
[laughing]
[speaking in a foreign language]
You sound weird on TV.
And when the commercial work didn't pan out,
Piper elbowed her way on to a game show.
[music playing]
No. Don't, don't do that.
[music playing]
Piper's game show hopes met a painful conclusion,
so she decided to dip her toes in the medical field.
You look like you're my age.
Yeah, well, um... I-I'm in,
I'm in the junior paramedics program so.
Cool.
Well, that was actually a lie
so she could fabricate a meet cute.
But hey, who's judging? That's not my job.
Hear me! Hear me!
As your Cactus Queen, I declare
the Swellview Cactus Convention open.
Piper's career took a pointed turn
when she became the local Cactus Queen.
You have to tap your staff on the ground... my queen.
Open!
[cheering]
Which begs the question, who doth giveth Piper a weapon?
Come at me, bros!
As with any entrepreneur/criminal,
Piper inevitably found herself
doing community service by court order.
You never should have stolen that baby elephant.
It followed me home.
Tell it to the judge, baby girl.
I did. She didn't believe me.
Combined with her curiosity,
Piper stumbled down a rabbit hole
that revealed Kid Danger was actually her brother.
[screaming]
Henry?
[screaming]
So seizing the opportunity of a lifetime,
Piper went to work.
Sorry I'm late. Traffic, am I right?
So is, uh, there assign seating,
or should I just grab any open desk?
Uh, we don't have desks.
Right, open workspace, very modern,
kind of a start up vibe. I like it.
Uh... [chuckles]
You don't work here.
Hey, yo, Piper, phone call
- for you on line two. - Wha?
- Take a message. - You the boss.
Sometimes you just can't take o for an answer.
Piper ended up being a critical tool
for the Man's Nest, maybe not in crime fighting.
What are you doing?
I'm trying to kick the laser out of his hand!
It's not gonna work.
Yes, it will!
I'm helping!
Any other task was fair game. Be it, back up photographer...
Great work, Schwoz. I'm on a five.
Whoo.
...Piano player...
♪ The tip job is not just For show ♪
...Or, of course, a personal driver.
- I'll drive. I have a license. - Established.
Dude, just stop.
In the end, Piper's resume took a pause when she decided
to pursue higher education.
I'm graduating too.
- Hmm? - Going to Florida State?
- Hmm? - Don't start.
You're my younger sister.
How could you be graduating already?
I did bad things, spent a lot of time
in summer school, ended up earning
enough extra credits to graduate early.
- Senior! - Seniors!
Senior!
Where she'd go from there, only time will tell.
Well, actually, only time travelers will tell.
I wouldn't hurt you, I'm your sister.
- What? - It's me, Piper.
- What? - From the future.
[everyone] What?
According to this version of Piper,
she goes on to lead the Anti-Robot Resistance.
They're going to send a terrible machine
to destroy me, Piper.
In the past, it's coming today.
This sounds pretty bad, dude.
This sounds like this lady's
watched Terminator too many times.
And if this bravery is any indicator,
we're in good hands.
Hey, aren't you coming?
No. I'm going to stay here
and try to buy Schwoz some more time.
It's not going to be easy.
That robot kid can't be reasoned with.
It doesn't feel pity or remorse or fear.
Okay. Bye!
Which of Piper's many jobs were your favorite?
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for more dangerous excitement from Swellview.
Money speaks louder than words.