♪ (jubilant rock music) ♪
- (squealing shrilly)
- It's pissing me the [bleep] off.
- NO!!! Why? You suck!
- (shrilly) I'm sorry!
- My shit comes out good.
- Oh no!
- (FBE) Now we're going to show you something... different.
- Different like how? Like nasty?
- (FBE) These videos, we're going to have you put something on.
- Okay... how sexy is it?
- Why the headphones? Is it going to be loud?
Are you going to scare me?
- Is this the new Lady Gaga single?
(caressing gently)
- (speaking gently) Good evening.
This video is... - This is weird.
- (woman) ...in combination-- - Am I going to get hypnotized?
- (woman) ...of the sounds... - Is this real?
Is she serious?
- (woman) ...especially... - (gasping) Yes, I love-- I love it.
- (woman) ...sounds that are very often requested.
- Oh my god, bitch. I'm turning this up.
- It's kind of turning me on.
- (woman) These sounds are quite intoxicating.
- Nope, a martini is.
- (woman) Take a listen to them forever. - I like your accent.
Where you from?
- I feel like I'm on some weird porn site
and she's trying to get me in for $9.99.
- (woman) So today, I would like to do... - I love this.
Am I yelling?
- (woman) ...relaxing sounds video. - Her voice is making me anxious.
- I'm aware of what this is. ASMR?
- Ah, this is one of those... gentle whispering.
(soothing noises)
- Oh, wow, that sound good when you move the tea like that.
(gently tapping box)
- This isn't very relaxing.
- What is this? (drumming table)
Like, that-- that doesn't annoy you?
- (laughing) Does she honest--
(cracking up)
It's so annoying.
- Aw, and people are loving this.
Someone out there's like, "(in ecstasy) Aaaah!"
- (squealing)
No! No! No! Don't touch the bags like that!
Aaaah! (rifling through bags)
Aaaah!
- I am getting a full on handjob right now.
Oh my god!
- At least her nails looked nice.
- It's like Chinese torture.
- I will turn on the sound before I nap
and I'll just lay there and I'll have it.
I love this.
- (speaking gently) I'm going to give you the ultimate scalp massage.
- So this is a thing?
- (woman) I'm going to get very close to you.
(whispering) I'm sorry.
- (cracking up)
- All right, come-- oh, I thought she was really here.
(rubbing microphone gently)
- This feels so real!
(rubbing microphone gently)
- Why does my scalp sound like a trash bag?
- To the left a little.
Oh, you doing the left. (laughing)
Yeah, that feels good.
- I don't like these feelings. (giggling)
- (woman) It feels good, huh? - This is so fricking weird!
I hate this. I hate this.
(gently rubbing microphone)
(tapping feet)
- You're so weird!
- (woman) ...this skin massager on you. - Uh-oh.
She's getting crazy!
- (woman) You can close your eyes if you want to.
- I'd rather die.
- All right, I'ma close 'em, but don't try no fancy shit.
- (woman) I'm going to use this on myself...
(soft brushing noises)
because it feels so good!
- This is getting weird! (laughing)
- (woman) ...because it feels so good.
- Yeah, she's scaring me.
- (woman) Last but not least...
(tapping brush softly) ...the purple...
- And some guy out there's like, "YES!
The purple brush!"
- (woman) Just going to use it to brush through your hair.
Okay?
(brushing against microphone) - Oh.
- Oh! I don't like that sound at all.
This is the worst one.
- (woman) Slow... - It's pissing me the [bleep] off.
(brushing against microphone) - (woman) Some more... enjoyment.
- Okay, wait, this is the best ear porn ever.
- This is for sure going to give me nightmares right away,
so thank you for that.
(scraping noisess)
- Oh, there's more? Oh shit.
- Different girl?
(scraping noises) - I don't like that.
I don't like that at all!
- (woman, softly) Soft. - Oh, these bitches are good.
- (woman) Tell me about your day.
- My day's getting better now.
- (woman) How was school?
- (incredulously) How was school?
- (woman) Don't worry.
- This is... - (woman) I'll be here.
- She sounds like a murderer.
- (woman) I'll be here.
- You'll be here?
No, I don't want you anywhere near me! (laughing)
- (woman) I'll be here.
- This one makes me uncomfortable. (laughing)
Thank God it's done!
- Is that the end?
I'm pregnant.
- That was amazing.
Let's not scroll below the table right now.
- Get this out of here.
I'm throwing this at you. Here, catch.
(grunting)
- (FBE) On the full episode of Celebs React.
- Oh my god!
That's what my hangover shits look like.
- (gentleman) I scream, you scream, plop, plop, baby!
(gleam)
- Why do I want to [bleep] this guy?
- (wheezing)
Ffffff-- [bleep] you!
- (FBE) We're going to show you one of your tweets.
- Oh no!
- No!
It's going to be really embarrassing.
- (FBE) How would you like to try your hand at some ASMR?
- Let's do it.
- (softly) Just the way you like it.
- AAAAH!!!
- (FBE) So you lost last time.
This is your chance for redemption. - Yeah!
Yeah! [Bleep] yeah.
I'm gonna do way better.
You're not going to make me laugh at all.
Let's go!
Nope. Nope. Nope.
NO!!!
Next video!
- Hello, lovely folks from YouTube.
I hope you enjoyed this clip.
- Thank you for watching here on the FBE channel.
You can watch the full episode on the Fullscreen app.
- New episode next week, so make sure you watch.
- Deuces, bitch!
Maybe not bitch, but Deuce is a good person.