I was thinking about you recently.
Cause we did a week of shows
in San Francisco just the other week.
You were thinking about me Conan?
And I was, yes, I think of you often.
In San Francisco?
LaBamba and I think of you constantly.
(audience laughing)
And I did a segment with your old friend, Bob Saget.
Saget, right.
And it's funny, (audience laughing)
but it's funny cause I realized at the time,
that you guys were both on the show, Full House together,
now both of you to come full circle
and you're both working on NBC.
Right.
He's on, he's working.
He's got a game show.
A game show.
One out of a hundred or something.
(Conan laughing) (audience laughing)
One versus a hundred.
I said those are your odds
of getting another job after doing a game show.
(audience laughs)
The guy busts my nuts all the time I mean, he comes
on here and just talks about me the whole time.
He is obsessed with you.
He's a little weird.
And then he calls me, (audience laughs)
he calls me saying "did you see me on Conan?
And I talked about,"
and then he makes me go to his house and watch him talking
about me on your show.
(audience laughing)
I swear to God.
Well, what is he like rubbing his chest
while it's all happening?
Yeah.
(audience laughing)
Seems pretty strange.
I want you to come over and watch me talk about you with me.
Yeah.
(audience laughs)
I didn't do it like that, you did it like that.
Mine was a more general.
Yours was very specific.
(audience laughs)
You got to get the nipples.
You got to, oh really?
I want to ask you about this picture.
It was just showed up in all the magazines.
What is it?
This is a picture of you and Zach Braff on the red carpet
and you, (audience laughs)
Best hug!
Yeah. you got best hug from some magazine.
It looks like you're going in for the kill on this one.
(audience laughing)
What's going on here, what happened?
You know that Zach Braff, right?
Yeah.
I was at the Golden, (audience laughing)
I hugged so many guys.
I don't remember which one it was.
(audience laughs)
It was at the Golden Globes
and I had just read some article that he was depressed.
He said he was having, so I went up and gave him a hug.
I said, "don't be depressed
You know, we, you know, we have a good life."
and then I saw the picture I got depressed.
(audience laughing)
No, he's a good guy.
Yeah, yeah.
He's a good man, I have to congratulate you.
ER, was having its troubles,
kind of on the ropes and then you enter the cast
and you've re-energized the whole show
and it's a, it's a big hit.
You must be excited and people, this is great!
Well, you know, it's an institution.
I mean, the show is honestly
the shows on the uprise before I came on the show.
It just started doing well last year
and in this season we've done great.
It's just been a blessing.
I think that show was living off Stamos fever right now.
That's what I think. (audience giggles)
No, no, no.
The show's great.
Well, one of the things
that you've added a lot of sex appeal to the cast.
Oh really, thank you Conan.
Yeah, not me personally saying that,
(audience laughing)
but women, people saying that.
Really?
But did you feel like they're constantly trying
to get situations where you
(audience guffawing)
(audience applauding)
Yes.
Were there any situations
where you've got to operate on this patient.
"Okay, but let me take my shirt off first"?
Is that happening a lot?
I'm not a shirt off guy.
But Selleck is a shirt off guy.
I used to be. (audience laughing)
But I don't know how, because I'm a scrawny little guy.
So I'm like pumped.
So I read guys, you know, like Brad Pitt
and Stallone, they pump up in between.
Did you ever do that pump up?
No, no.
And it showed, but
(audience laughing)
you do the thing.
So I'm hiding in the, I didn't know the cast very well,
so I'm hiding in this back room, like doing pushups.
You know, when I bang my head on a pipe or a toilet
or something and I'm pumped and I have a headache.
So you're self-conscious.
Why are you self-conscious about taking your shirt off?
Do you...
I'm just not a shirt off...
What are you getting at Conan?
(audience applauding)
I have, I actually Take it off!
(audience cheering)
But I actually, I have a very, this is not why,
because I could tape it, but I have a very strange belly,
I have a weird belly button, belly button.
What do you mean, you have a weird belly button?
When I was a kid, I had a hernia and they were,
they thought I had it, but they told my parents,
you have a hernia, and they went in to cut it open.
And he said, he's got no hernia.
Right.
And they sewed it up and it was Stevie Wonder,
was the doctor, so I had this scar.
My belly button looks like a small,
like a small nose, like it's not good.
Your belly button looks like a nose?
Yes.
What are you talking about?
It looks like a small nose.
It's just a horrible belly button.
I, you know, what am I going to say?
We gotta see it now, I think.
(audience cheers)
Don't you think we need to see it?
(audience cheers)
We gotta see it!
Even Selleck agrees.
(Selleck mumbles)
If I show you guys got to show, I'm not.
(audience cheers)
All right, let me see yours, let me see yours first.
(audience cheers)
All right, I'll go first.
Listen, listen.
I will, I will go first.
I'm cautioning people at home.
Adjust the contrast on your set
because this is like nine layers of makeup.
What you're about to see is actual Conan O'Brien skin tone.
(audience cheering and laughing)
That's good.
Mine is, mine is awful.
Oh no, you should save yours.
You going?
Yeah, let's save yours til the end.
Selleck your next.
This is ah..
(audience cheering)
Oh, no!
Max, can we have a drum roll please?
(drum roll)
This is mine, it's terrible.
(audience cheering)
(audience laughing)
It's, that's,
It's not,
It's, it's not good.
Yeah!
I had, I had an ex who wanted to pierce it.
(audience laughs)
Which woulda been weird.
You know, you could put a Magnum mustache on that.
(audience cheers)
(audience laughing)
Okay then.
Now put it on.
Ahhh!
(audience laughs)
(Tom laughing)
What kind of show is this?
What kind of television show is this?
I don't know?
I love trying to segue into a plug now.
Very good, the ER,
the ER season finale airs this Thursday night at 10 on NBC.
It's a great show, watch it.
It's a great show, watch it!
John Stamos, everybody! (audience cheering)