Okay, here we go
♪ One is a little guy hiding in a tree ♪
♪ Two are together and they're swimming out to sea ♪
♪ Three on a Ferris wheel ♪
♪ Four at the zoo ♪
♪ Five in my pocket ♪
♪ Six in my shoe ♪
♪ Seven on a mountain top ♪
♪ Eight in a park ♪
♪ Nine in a gondola ♪
♪ 10 in the dark ♪
♪ It's everywhere you go ♪
♪ Everywhere you look ♪
♪ Everywhere you find an antisemite. ♪
There he is!
(kazoo music)
♪ I feel charming, oh so charming. ♪
♪ Its alarming how charming I feel. ♪
Move you're ass dip shit!
♪ And so pretty that I hardly can believe I'm real. ♪
♪ La la la la la la la la la la ♪
Burn in hell!
♪ See that pretty girl in the mirror there ♪
♪ What mirror where? ♪
♪ Who could that attractive girl be? ♪
♪ Who which one where hum? ♪
♪ Such a pretty face ♪ ♪ Hum ♪
♪ Such a pretty dress ♪ ♪ Hum ♪
♪ Such a pretty smile ♪ ♪ Hum ♪
♪ Such a pretty me! ♪ ♪ Hum ♪
Yes!
I see London.
I see France.
I see my golden underpants.
Now that's high quality H2O.
(guitar music)
A ferrari!
Tesstarossa!
Magnum P.I. me baby!
I got the mustache!
But you forgot the gun!
This is incredible!
It's a fantasy for everybody!
It doesn't open!
Come on, underneath.
Underneath.
Pull, pull, pull.
Oh my God.
What the- Oh are you kidding me?
Oh I'm so sorry.
I don't know what to say.
Oh go, go go!
You like to insult people?
(slapping)
Was that your feet?
(slapping)
Yes it's the feet.
The feet uppercut.
(hitting)
Here comes the double foot.
This is good.
Smell it.
Now take it.
That's for you.
Did you call him?
Yeah, I called him.
What'd he say?
What'd who say?
The guy you called.
Who did I call?
The guy from the young comedians special.
Oh yeah no, I gotta call him.
So you didn't call him.
No, I called him.
No you didn't.
I thought you called.
Sandy, you're making even less sense then usual.
Nah, I'm not.
Somethings off.
Off how?
I don't know.
Different.
Did you dye your hair or something?
I don't think so.
Maybe it's a brain tumor?
Maybe it is.
Smelled like you could use a shower, stinky.
Listen, you can think what you want
about my personal hygiene
but please don't waste any water
that's bad policy.
If you need to amuse yourself at my expense,
then just rough me up or something.
Fair enough.
Okay, Okay!
(sighs)
Let's go Waterboy!
Ow!
Dick pic, that's a weird thing to do
there's no reason for me to do it.
I'm fucking married but,
all my friends do 'em so I'm like
what the fuck.
At least I can be part I can be part of the
conversation when they're talking about they're
dick pics.
"Oh yes, definitely."
(laughing)
So, I did my first dick pic and I look back at it
and there is a ghost in the background.
So there's a ghost in the image.
And I'm like I live in a fucking haunted house?
I had no idea.
I want to show everybody.
Cause, what are the chances of catching that?
But, my dick doesn't look as good as I want it to look,
in the image.
Plus the fucking ghost was really tall,
so he made my dick not look exact-
Plus the fucking ghost was holding a ruler next to my dick.
I was like, "What the fuck is your problem" to the ghost.
The ghost was like, "I live here too, I like to have fun."
Young man.
Look what I found here.
A nice balloon.
Do you want it?
It's right here.
You know you shouldn't jump around when this nice woman
holding a sharp pair of scissors.
If you move, she could slip and
slice your jugular main on accident.
There is no where to stitch the jugular.
All of your blood will be on the floor in 4 minutes.
I've seen this.
I've done this.
You don't want this.
(crying)
(thump)
(crying)
Well then, at least it's a good time to shave
his neck.
I would get him quick.
(jazz music)