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[David] Mary Sardelis is about to visit her mom.
I'm excited and I'm scared.
[David] Scared because this visit could lead to her arrest.
You know, we'll probably walk in and everything will be normal
because it'll be unexpected.
[David] Mary's been banned from entering her mother's
retirement home in Ottawa...
..for almost a year.
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[David] Restricted on most days to waving at her mom,
Voula, from outside.
316 days will never be made up again.
She's got dementia.
[David] You didn't get to see her on Christmas?
-Not on Christmas Day. -What about Thanksgiving?
-No. -What about for her birthday?
No.
[David] The home says Mary was banned for being aggressive to
staff, but Mary says she was just speaking out about
intolerable living conditions at her mom's home.
The owner came out of nowhere and he said,
"I need to talk to you."
He didn't like the sound of my voice.
He said, "I'm calling the police to remove you."
I said to him, "My mom's a resident here,
"she pays rent," and I said, "Why are you banning me?"
And he said, "I should have done it a long time ago."
[David] And Mary isn't alone.
Across Canada, retirement and long-term care homes are handing
out no-trespass orders.
In Ontario, they don't even need to go to court.
Just write a letter or give a verbal warning,
enough to ban people permanently.
Thank you all for coming and telling us your story,
although I wish you didn't have to tell your story.
So do we.
Yeah, you're not the only one.
[David] All three of these women face restrictions to visit their
parents' homes.
It hurt.
And I not only missed my parents,
I missed what I was giving to the family of other residents
as well.
[David] Tanney Kennedy watched Mary get banned and she believes
asking the owner why may have cost her, too.
He banned me.
He sent a formal e-mail saying I'm not allowed on the
property anymore.
[David] The home says Tanney was told to leave for being abusive
to staff.
She rejects that.
I've never once yelled, never once aggressive,
never once assertive.
I was a thorn in the side of the managers of the place,
and they threatened, on several occasions,
to not allow me to see my mother.
[David] At a different home, Susan MacCauley says she faces
consequences for speaking up.
There appears to be a message to visitors.
It would seem so.
-And what is that message? -You're not welcome.
Silence required.
-Shut up or put up. -Silence required.
[David] As Susan sees those restrictions coming,
she warns her ailing mother.
When I thought it was really going to happen,
that I wasn't going to be allowed to see her,
I was having tea with her and I said,
"You know, Mom, if I don't come, it's not because
"I don't want to.
"It's because somebody is stopping me from coming."
It was just-- it was so sad, you know?
I thought that if they stopped me from coming to see her,
she would never know why I didn't come.
[David] The home only lets her visit during the two afternoon
hours when her mother is normally asleep,
restrictions that remain for 18 months until she dies.
You have a mother who's 97 years old.
I know. Time is not on her side.
[David] Mary worries she's now on the same path.
A ticking time bomb.
Will she make it?
It's horrible.
We've seen people out of homes for years
and not visiting people.
[David] Elder advocate, Jane Meadus,
says in Ontario the law says homes can't ban visitors for
speaking out.
We don't think that there's any time they should be using those.
[David] And yet they keep coming.
We get calls all the time about this.
-All the time. -All the time about this.
It's usually a family member calling saying that they've been
in the home, they were upset about something.
They often will admit that they became upset and raised their
voice, and it's often for very good reasons.
They've been telling the homes not to do certain things or to
treat their parent in a certain way.
They're advocating for Mom or Dad.
Advocating for Mom or Dad.
Things are going not well, and the home says that's it,
we're just not going to let you come in.
And not only is it illegal, they're also often the
substitute decision maker for that person,
so they actually have to be there to see what's going on to
make decisions.
So they're playing on people's fear of interacting with law
enforcement, of getting arrested,
getting charged. -Right.
[David] And that is exactly what Mary plans to do.
I would have to go in and provoke an arrest to bring it
before a judge.
[David] Holding protests with other families isn't enough.
She wants to challenge the trespass order.
Otherwise it just will keep going on and on and on.
So it's a matter of knowing I've challenged it by saying,
all right, arrest me.
Like, do it. Are you going to do it?
Do it so I can bring it before a court.
[David] The home isn't budging, still won't let her in,
so she goes in and the home staff calls the police.
They charge me.
They charge me under the Trespass To Property Act.
Which means you have to go to court.
Which is exactly what you were hoping.
Which is what we were hoping just to get justice.
[David] No choice but to break the law to challenge it.
I won't stop.
I will not stop to get justice for her.
I'll do whatever it takes to make sure it doesn't happen to
anybody else.
Because she doesn't deserve it.
She does not deserve it.
It's not just happening to you and it's not just happening to
you and it's not just happening to you.
That's right.
It's happening right across the country.
Yes.
Do you think it should be allowed to happen?
No, that's why it needs to stop because they're paying
the price.
The reason that people are banned is so that nobody is
there to report the neglect and abuse that's happening.
And so the neglect and abuse continues on.
[David] The owner of Mary's mom's home won't talk to us on
camera but says Mary was verbally warned about her
behaviour towards staff and says it has the right to ban
aggressive visitors.
Back at Mary's mom's home...
..she's won a victory.
Prosecutors drop the trespass charges.
But will the home threaten her again?
She's about to find out.
Hi!
[David] Mary makes it inside her mother Voula's room,
first time in nearly a year.
But staff are still threatening to call the cops.
I did not expect that they were going to call the police
on me again.
[David] But the police never come.
How do you feel waiting and not knowing if,
in fact, the police were going to be called?
Angst.
Frustrated.
I felt like my stomach was coming up to my throat,
because I thought here we go again.
[David] After our visit, the home tells us they're letting
Mary back in if she follows their rules.
Do you feel like this fight has been worth it?
Absolutely.
And the more and more I find out about how other people are
affected and how far more atrociously people have been
affected, no, it's definitely worth it.
Someone had to do something.
[David] Do you have a story to share about your seniors' home?
E-mail us, marketplace@cbc.ca.