I have a lot of clients in my private practice that have suffered from this
I have heard from a lot of you on tumblr, on twitter, on my website, that you've either known or you do suffer
from this. And what I'm talking to you a little bit about today is cutting. I know some of you are thinking [gasp] eurgh,
I don't want to talk about that. And some of you are thinking oh my gosh, I've been suffering from that for years,
what do you have to say about it? And others are thinking, oh, my best friend does that. I need tips; how do I help?
What do I do? Well, today's video is just going to give you a little bit of a therapeutic view of cutting.
And, to kinda start off, I want to let you know that, first of all, cutting actually and unfortunately is not in the DSM as an
actual diagnosis. It's kind of something that comes along with other diagnoses. They have it listed under things such
as Borderline Personality Disorder, uh, a lot of it comes along with eating disorders...
Obviously, I know some of you may suffer also from an eating disorder as well as self harm behavior.
And, another thing that I want to address right away is that I'm in no way condoning this behavior. Everything that I
say today isn't meant to glorify, nor shame, any of these behaviors. I just want to shed a little light on something that
isn't really talked about, the same way that I'm doing with eating disorders. Does that make sense?
And I also will not approve any comments below that say, "this is how I do it," "this is a better way," I do not promote
that kind of content. Nothing that I do... I don't want to promote any self harming behavior. Whether we're talking
about actual self harm like cutting and scratching, things like that, or eating disorder behavior.
I'm trying to promote wellness, right? "Healthy mind, healthy body," that's kind of where we're going.
So that's just a little disclaimer because I know that this topic comes with a lot of heat, okay?
So, cutting... Some of you may do it yourself, some people might know someone who does it... Why do people do it?
The quick answer - the, like, you have 30 seconds, tell me what you know - would be that it's almost the same reason
that we have eating disorders. We use the cutting and the scratching, some people even bang their head on walls and
things like that, we use that behavior as an outlet for unwanted emotions. Right? I've said that before when it
comes to eating disorders. And the strange thing about cutting is that it has the same feeling to a lot of people
that, for anorexics, when they're in a starvation mode for, y'know, who knows how many days on end, and for bulimics
or binge eaters when they're binging. It's that same kind of out-of-body, lack of any sensation, you're kind of not even
yourself. You're almost watching over yourself, watching yourself do that. Remember when I talked about that in my
bulimia and binge eating videos, when I talked about that out-of-body experience? A lot of people that I've worked with
before who've done self harm behaviors explain it like that. And, I know for many of us who don't engage in that
behavior, we can think, "oh my gosh, that has to hurt so bad, why would anybody do that? ugh, I hate scabs and
bleeding and eurgh," It's not about the pain. It's not even about the blood, to be honest. It's actually a release.
When someone actually cuts themselves, because they're in control of the self harm behavior, when they're cutting
themselves, there's no fear, like when we fall and scrape our knees, we have that fear reaction, ahh! We don't want to
hurt ourselves. We don't want to scrape or bump or break a bone. But for them, they're in control of it.
So, it's a very different experience. A lot of people get confused with that. They think that it's a fear they're
recreating, or, I don't know, maybe they've been cut by a parent... It's not anything to do with that.
And it's not attention seeking because cutters usually hide all of the wounds and the scars that have built up, they
usually cut in places that are easy to hide with clothing, like upper arms or thighs. You might have someone in your life
that's doing it that you don't even know is doing it. So why do they do it? If they don't really do it for attention and it's
not about the pain, then why would anybody choose to cut? It's the same as an eating disorder. Nobody chooses to do it.
I'm not condoning the behavior either, I don't want anybody going out back home and trying this. This isn't something to
try. This is a really difficult thing to get over. It's like somebody saying they want anorexia. "Oh, I wish somebody
just gave me anorexia." Or somebody saying "oh, I've always wanted to be a bulimic." No you don't.
And you know, if you've suffered from an eating disorder, you're like, like hell you do! This is the worst thing that's
ever happened to me. I can't get out of it! I'm caught! Right? Same with cutting.
It's just as bad, it's just as hard. People tend to do self harm behaviors kind of to seek normal. I know many of you are
thinking, "what the heck do you mean 'seek normal?' Nobody cuts! What?" It's a recreation - and this is the
therapeutic mind, y'know. Just humor me for a little bit while I explain how therapists talk about this. This is, let's say I'm a
little girl. I have parents who aren't really helpful. They're not around. They kind of abandon me, but not in the real sense
of the word. They're not there, maybe my mom is drugged out all the time or drinking, maybe my dad is sexually abusing me.
It doesn't have to be sexual abuse, but, just for this example, let's say my dad is sexually abusing me. And it's painful.
So I'm recreating the pain. That pain, as sad as it sounds, is almost a comfort. Does that make sense?
I know that's really hard to fathom, but, I mean, that's just one example. Many of you, I'm sure, have a ton of other
examples and experiences with self harm behavior and why you do it. I would encourage you to share, maybe how you've worked through it, what you've noticed and
learned from your experiences. Because that's what I'm more into cultivating here is us learning from one another so
we can move forward. But, the truth behind cutting is that a lot of it has to do with a comfort.
It's a release. It's the same way we use our eating disorder. I don't know if any of you can kind of make that parallel that
I'm trying to draw, but what we're really doing, and that's why I say it's not about the pain. It's like somebody saying an
eating disorder is about the food. It's not about the food! It's about a lot of other things. We just choose to focus on the
food, right? So they choose to focus on the blood and the scabs and the scars and the cutting and... It's all about
hiding; it's very sneaky and it's very shame-filled, the same way an eating disorder is. And, that's kind of just scratching
the surface, no pun intended, I'm sorry. [giggle] But we're just getting into this in a way so that we can begin talking about this.
Because just like eating disorders, cutting and self harm behavior isn't talked about enough. It's not even recognized
as a real diagnosis in the DSM, which really frustrates me. It's only listed as like a subset of other diagnoses.
But we know that it's a huge issue. It's a problem. The same way that eating disorders is a problem and nobody really
talks about them that much. And that's why I created this video this week, so we can begin talking about self harm behavior.
And I would encourage you to leave your comments below. And the comments that I would prefer to be left are things
like, "this is what I did to help myself get better," "these are things that I've learned from my therapist or through my own experience."
Like I said, this isn't a playground for "these are better ways to do self harm behavior..." That is not what I wanted to create.
Let's help each other. If you have a workbook that's really helped you, that you've worked on with your therapist, let us
know about it! Y'know, put the link down so we can find it. Let's help each other as we work harder because these
issues, eating disorders and self harm behaviors are really difficult and I want to create an environment and a community that is supportive.
And don't forget to subscribe to my channel, 'cause this is only the beginning of our conversation about this.
And so when I post another video, you'll hear about it. And don't forget my website, katimorton.com.
There's a lot of great feedback on there, a lot of journals - feel free to vent about things that are going on with you -
people post art, whatever you need and you want, it's on there, so definitely check it out. And keep taking these steps
with me as we work towards a healthy mind, and of course, a healthy body.
Subtitles by the Amara.org community