- Which ingredient makes pizza the most pizza?
- Let's talk about that.
"Good Mythical Morning"!
- Today is about pizza, not smoothies,
but just bear with me.
I make the same smoothie every morning
without fail,
but sometimes,
I do fail to put everything in it.
I get distracted.
I leave something out.
It's usually the frozen blueberries
and it turns out that frozen blueberries
are pretty important.
They make my smoothie cold and purple
instead of warm and barf color.
- Okay. Yeah.
- What I'm saying is
frozen blueberries, I think,
are the most important ingredient
in making my smoothie my smoothie.
- Okay. I think I follow.
You ever done that with pizza?
- I don't like blueberries on pizza.
- What about pissert?
- Good point.
- Well, today we are gonna do that with pizza.
It's time for
"Oh, Pizza, My Love. Where Do I Start?"
Is it your crust or your cheese
that cements a place in my heart?
Well, what is the most indispensable ingredient
in a pizza?
We're gonna find out by trying four versions of pizza,
each one, missing a key ingredient,
but to determine which ingredient
does the most to make pizza pizza,
we have to find out which versions are the most forgettable.
- Yeah, so after we taste each weird version
of an almost pizza,
we're gonna be ranking the missing ingredients behind us
from most important ingredient
to least important.
- So, at least important,
boi, pie,
not really pie type,
pie think I'm in like with you,
and pie will always love you.
- Like the Dolly Parton song.
- Yeah.
- I like how this one has an explanation.
Like boy, bye.
- Well, we are middle aged men.
It's like sometimes,
sometimes we do need the explanations.
- All right, whichever ingredient comes out on top
will be named the MVE,
the most valuable element in pizza.
- But first,
we have to sample some good old fashioned
unadulterated pizza.
We just have to.
- I mean... - You know?
- We can't not eat real pizza.
- Now, this pizza,
homemade by Nicole.
- Thank you, Nicole.
This is my specifications here.
- Yeah, this is
my specifications. - I like a nice sausage
and you like...
- A bigger piece than you.
I like pepperoni, black olives, and mushrooms.
- 'Course it's got everything on it.
Just eating pizza,
realizing how great it is when it's all there.
- It really works when it all comes together.
- Yeah.
So, let's take it apart and get weird with it.
- Okay.
All right, we've got our first experimental pizza here
and our sauce over here.
No sauce here,
'cause it's all over here.
- My jar.
- None of it's left here
and entered here.
- Right.
- So, let's try this sauceless pizza.
- Now, I gotta say,
this looks good.
It looks like pizza.
- You might think it's just a normal pizza.
I'm very self-conscious of the way I say pizza,
'cause I'm saying it so much
and I'm putting in a T in it.
- You know, you're saying it,
a double Z has a T sound.
- Oh good.
So, I'm right. - You want it to be
pee-zah?
- I don't know. Something about saying it so much.
I'm like...
- If you said pee-zah,
I wouldn't be a friend.
- Pee-zah.
- Pizza.
Double Z has a T sound.
- In Italy,
that's how it works, right?
It's a T sound.
- Okay, two bites into this.
- No one here is Italian.
- I might not even think that I was eating
a different kind of pizza.
Just to be honest.
You know, I don't,
I don't have a super sensitive palate.
I just kinda just eat.
I'm like a bulldozer
just gonna a job site
where like, we gotta turn this building down.
That's how I think about my food.
- It's kinda like a cheesy bread
with meat on top. - A flatbread.
and the other thing is
E.T.
- All right, we can E.T. it.
Kind of early in the episode for something like that.
- It took 20 seasons for us
to finally touch fingers like this.
- We've done it before. - We've done this?
- We've done it before. - I forgot.
- It was special.
- There's other kinds of pizzas.
Like sometimes, people will put pesto.
- Yes. - Barbecue sauce.
- Yes. - Ranch.
- That tells you that it's malleable
and what if it just disappeared?
- Yeah.
- You know, I think we're learning
sauce is not that important.
If it were really important,
it would go over here
and if it were not,
it would go on this grease stain
over here. - So, let's hold on.
Something else might be worse
or better or less important.
Less important, really,
is what we're going for.
- I would've thought this was one or two,
but we're already at three.
- I was on three or four.
- I'm surprised
and I do like this.
- Oh, sorry.
Here we have pizza without cheese.
- And here we have cheese.
- This is gonna suck, y'all.
I mean, I'm just...
- Well, hold on. What are you saying?
It looks great.
- It looks like a normal pizza.
You don't have to dab it,
'cause it doesn't have a lot of the grease.
You're a dabber.
We've had a lot of pizza together
and especially,
if we happen to be in New York.
Man, I wanna go back to New York.
It's been so long.
- Just to dab pizza.
- But I like,
the grease is just part of it for me,
but you go three, four napkins deep, sometimes.
- So, this right here might be right up my alley.
Maybe I'm lactose intolerant for other reasons.
- But also, how well do the toppings hold?
- I mean, that's pretty good.
Nicole, you did.
Well, that was extreme, right?
- I guess. - A little bit extra.
I just don't know how to look at it.
It's like I need to look away.
- Do you know how to say it?
Pizza. - Pee-zah.
Yeah. Pizza.
- Pee-zah.
- It's nice to know that you've been saying something right
this whole time.
You know?
To realize for years you've been saying something wrong.
- Well, and you know how you've got friends
and there's like one or two words
that they all say wrong.
Like, every friend has one or two words
they say wrong.
Like, we had a friend that said flustrated
for a long time.
- Yeah, until he wasn't our friend anymore,
- We were like it's flustered or frustrated,
but flustrated is not a word.
A smart dude,
always said flustrated.
It flustrated me a lot,
but I never said anything about it.
If you had a friend who said pee-zah
every single time you had pizza.
- I mean, I think I would have thought
he knew something I didn't.
- He must be saying it right.
It is a double Z.
There's no T.
- This is not bad, my friend.
- I don't like it at all,
because I know what it could be.
- Yeah.
- I mean, this is coming from a man that likes cat food.
- It's sauce bread.
I mean, coming from a man who doesn't like tomatoes,
but tomato sauce is different
and I don't want you to try to convince me otherwise,
because don't do that to me.
- It tastes like a...
- But it's not... - It's more like a
breadstick dipped in marinara,
which again, is not a bad thing,
which I will enjoy on occasion.
- It doesn't look right. - But not when there's
pizza to be enjoyed.
- So, we're gonna take this cheesy
and it's more important than the sauce, easily.
It may be number one,
but we're just gonna leave it plopped down at...
- I'd really like to just grab a cylinder
of cheese like that.
- I'm like with you. What?
I think I'm in like with you.
This is why I don't read these.
- Yeah.
Okay, before we try our next bastardized version of pizza,
we wanna remind you that tickets for
"Good Mythical Evening"
are on sale now.
- Ooh, what is that?
If you ever wanted to see
what a live and uncensored version
of "Good Mythical Morning" would look like,
anything can happen,
then you don't wanna miss it.
It's happening on October 28th.
Tickets are on sale now
at goodmythicalevening.com.
- Only buy a ticket if you're ready for it.
- Yeah.
I don't know if I'm gonna buy a ticket for it.
Yes, I will.
Well, no, I'm not.
I'm just gonna be there. - Just be there
- Do I have to buy a ticket?
- I think, technically.
What is this here in front of ya?
We've got a pizza without toppings,
because all the toppings are here
and I just, I don't even know where to start, honestly.
Yeah. - It's like...
- What is that? - What is happening here?
- Is this a five-year-old's birthday party?
I hate kids
and I really hate kids' birthday parties
and kids who just eat cheese pizza,
don't even talk to me.
- Hold on.
- What?
- You're right.
- This is the most popular form of pizza.
- I think this is just cheese pizza.
Oh!
- See, my body won't even accept it.
- Right.
- Like it's like, my hands are like,
no, we do not take this!
We're not children.
- You reject... Here's another piece, man.
- This is kinda like a Little Dino's.
Remember Little Dino's would have the big bubbles?
- Yeah, I do.
Dink it. Sink it.
Takes me back.
There's crust, there's sauce, there's cheese.
- I mean, this is fundamentally pizza.
- This is cheese pizza.
- Oh really? - Yes.
- As much as I like toppings
and I think that they make a pizza a pizza,
I don't really believe
that they are the most important ingredient
or these are the least important ingredient.
- I think they're the least important ingredient.
- Easily the least
important ingredient. - We're gonna go out
on a limb here and say,
I think this is still pizza.
- And it tastes good
and the cheese is good,
the sauce is good, the bread is good.
You're gonna have a good time.
- And sometimes,
when I've been eating pizza with toppings,
then I feel like I can go over to the kids cheese pizza
and eat that and it doesn't count.
- Less guilt.
- I love it. - Yeah.
- And finally,
pizza without dough.
Crust.
You know that crust is just dough that's been cooked.
- True. - This is the
most visually...
- Puzzling. - Concerning
one so far.
- Well, think about it as like a pizza Uncrustable,
but like... - Oh, they should do that.
- Completely.
Should they do that?
- It would just be a packet of cheese
and it wouldn't be this in a plastic bag.
- I mean, we need to taste it.
- Just like Go-Gurt.
- Can I get a,
oh, there's,
look at what...
The way that Nicole did it, there's...
- There's still sauce underneath it.
The sauce is still underneath,
but there's just no...
- You sorta gotta pinch it a little bit.
- Oh, you're doing a pinch.
So, now I just... - Is there a reason
it's still cold?
- I just wanted the cheese to be able to be picked up
by you guys.
I didn't want it to be too messy.
- Well, I appreciate that, Nicole.
- You're welcome.
- I mean, I don't...
- You're having a lot of trouble over there.
- I'm afraid I'm gonna bite a finger.
- This is clear evidence
that you have never done exactly what's happening right now
and I have regularly done this.
You talk about going out...
- You made one of these?
- You talk about going over to the cheese pizza
to feel less guilt about eating more pizza.
I just go to the pizza
and just grab the toppings
and just eat the toppings.
Like, if we get down to a couple of the pieces of pizza
and no one else wants anymore,
I'm a topping grabber.
I'm living that keto life
every once in a while. - I get that.
- Right at the end,
right at the end of a pizza binging session.
I can be a little bit keto right now.
Yeah, it's nice to get back into
your meal plan while still eating pizza.
- Yeah. - I get it.
So, but it's kinda like that magic trick
where you pull the...
- Oh, see if you can do that.
The table apron.
What's that called?
The table apron out from under the stuff?
- A table cloth?
- Pull it real fast. - Table cloth.
See that?
- It surprisingly got nowhere.
- It kinda worked.
Morgan was impressed.
- Now, because this is a little bit cold.
- Hanging around newborn lately, though.
It's easier to impress him.
- Yeah, right.
Because this is a little bit cold.
- Look what a full human can do.
- This is not,
this isn't indicative of what,
like again,
I usually am just taking hot sauce
and cheese off of the top
and it's an enjoyable experience.
This is not the same thing for me,
but I'm not gonna hold the temperature against it.
Clearly, if you serve this to somebody
out of all these things that we've served up,
this is the one thing that people would be
most disappointed in
and you could also go as far as to say,
well, if there's no crust there,
it's not a pizza, by definition,
from a structural standpoint,
but you know what?
I thought I was gonna be a structural engineer
and I took that class
and I was like, this is boring.
I don't wanna do it.
So, I don't care about structure.
I care about taste.
- This is fun.
I think I'll add that.
You know, it gives you permission
to just go with what you want the most.
- Yeah, so I mean,
unless you have any opposition to this,
I feel like because it's important
and it does make a pizza a pizza,
in a lot of ways,
it's at least number two.
Right? - Right.
So, then, we're moving...
Here, we gotta really get in sync here.
Oh, you're saying...
- Do you feel what I'm saying?
- Okay.
Oh. - Yeah.
- That's a bold move.
There's nothing basic about that choice.
- Right, and I mean,
lactose intolerant people maybe have a problem
and I used to think that I was lactose intolerant.
but I wasn't.
I was mistaken.
We all have our cross to bear,
but let's not bear other people's.
I'm good with that.
- Yeah. Listen.
I'm sorry, y'all,
putting your vegan cheese
and your other things on pizza
and calling it pizza,
'cause again, remember...
- You're missing the most important ingredient.
- Remember this?
You think this doesn't look like a pizza?
Well, it looks more like a pizza than this,
I think.
- You gotta have cheese.
I think, too.
You gotta have cheese to have a pizza.
There you have it.
The definitive list.
The most valuable ingredient,
is that what we're calling it?
- Yeah, MVE, baby.
Most valuable element.
Ingredient with an E.
- I can spell ingredient with an E.
Is cheese.
Pie will always love you.
There, definitively, we figured it out.
- Way to go, cheese. - You're welcome.
- You're the champ again.
Let us know in the comments
how stupid that you think you were before we schooled you.
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You know what time it is.
- Hi, I'm Joe.
- And I'm Asia.
- And this is Silas.
- And we just spent our first night in our new house.
- [Both] And it's time to spin the wheel
of mythicality.
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