♪ Naija told me, don't say this ♪
♪ And if I do, I'm going to hell ♪
♪ But (beep) it ♪
♪ I know that I'm short, but have y'all seen her ponytail ♪
- Oh, my God.
♪ At the family reunion ♪
♪ Who we introducing ♪
(audience cheering)
- [Nick] Get 'em, Bobby J.
He definitely need a booster seat.
(audience laughing)
(hip hop music)
♪ Your girl ain't me ♪
♪ Came to my house and I let her (beep) my meat ♪
(buzzer dings)
♪ Aye, they know I'ma get it ♪
♪ I be dripping water and his chain look like liquid ♪
(buzzer dings)
♪ Aye, they know they can't abandon ♪
♪ I be from another world, no, another planet ♪
(buzzer dings)
♪ Aye, they know I got (beep) ♪
♪ Your girlfriend know I'm always on top ♪
(buzzer dings) (audience cheering)
♪ The 'Bama, your girlfriend know ♪
♪ I'ma hit her with the hammer ♪
♪ Aye, your girl know I- ♪
(audience cheering)
(buzzer dings)
♪ Why you bullspittin', why you bullspittin' ♪
♪ Okay, yeah, y'all know I do my thing ♪
♪ Hitman, take off your hat, your head super clean ♪
- [Audience] Aye!
(buzzer dings)
♪ You know that I'ma G ♪
♪ I sting (beep) like a (beep) bumblebee ♪
(buzzer dings)
♪ Aye, (beep), I hate those, I got chips like potatoes ♪
(buzzer dings) (audience cheering)
♪ Aye, they know I got the belt ♪
♪ I'm doing this (beep), not for my health ♪
(buzzer dings)
(audience cheering) ♪ I got it out the dirt ♪
♪ (beep) with the team, you gonna get yourself hurt ♪
(buzzer dings)
(audience cheering)
♪ Why you bullspittin', why you bullspittin' ♪
♪ Why you bullspittin' ♪
(audience cheering)
♪ Why you bullspittin', why you bullspittin' ♪
♪ Why you bullspittin' ♪
♪ You know my flow nice ♪
♪ Your girl came to me because I'm so precise ♪
(audience cheering)
(buzzer dings)
♪ Uh, I be killing you, one-on-one, girl, I'm an original ♪
(buzzer dings)
♪ It gets hectic ♪
♪ When I get on this bull, y'all know it's gonna be epic ♪
(audience cheering)
(buzzer dings)
♪ Yeast, on this bull, I'm a beast ♪
(audience cheering)
(buzzer dings)
♪ I'm killin' it, Quintez, you so innocent ♪
(audience cheering)
♪ (mumbles), activist, alchemist ♪
(audience cheering)
(buzzer dings)
♪ Heat, if I get your girl, I'ma make her cheat ♪
(audience cheering)
(buzzer dings)
♪ Ain't no stopping me, you know I'm a G ♪
(audience cheering)
♪ Why you bullspittin', why you bullspittin' ♪
(audience cheering)
- Legs.
Legs is the word of the day.
Need y'all to repeat after me when I say legs.
What's the word of the day, legs?
- [Audience] Legs!
- Now that they know, let's go back to my house
and finish spreading the word.
(audience laughing)
(buzzer dings)
- [Nick Cannon] Okay, okay.
(audience cheering)
- Have some.
- Okay.
(chips crunching)
- I just shared a snack with a snack.
(audience laughing)
(buzzer dings)
(audience cheering)
- All right y'all, I'm gonna need your help for this one.
The word of the day is soda, okay?
I need y'all to say that with me, say soda.
- [Audience] Soda!
- You know why that's the word of the day?
- Why?
- Cause you up here looking so delicious.
He he he.
(audience laughing)
(buzzer dings)
(audience cheering)
♪ No more, I'm boo'd up ♪
♪ This right here my girl, Marie ♪
♪ I swear that she's a super freak ♪
♪ She show me what the (beep) do at least once a week ♪
♪ And even though I'm bite-sized, she don't use her teeth ♪
♪ I ain't lonely no more, I'm boo'd up ♪
♪ I ain't lonely no more, yo, who's up ♪
♪ This right here my boo, Kim ♪
♪ And I swear she's super fly ♪
♪ She cook the best fried chicken ♪
♪ So I don't care that her weave is dry ♪
(audience laughing) ♪ I ain't lonely no more, I'm boo'd up ♪
(buzzer dings)
(audience clapping)
- Your pairing is DJ D-Wreck and Nick Cannon.
(audience laughing)
(audience cheering)
(Bobby J clears his throat)
- You know I'm about to fire your ass, right?
(audience laughing)
- As bad as a DJ I've been, what's taking you so long?
(audience laughing)
- You filled out any nursing home applications?
- You know, I DJ at a nursing home every Tuesday.
(wrong buzzer sounds)
(audience laughing)
(buzzer dinging)
(horn playing)
(audience cheering)
♪ I be in your house, but not at night ♪
♪ See something you like, 'cause I lay pipe ♪
♪ Bathroom tub next to the bathroom sink ♪
♪ And if my crack hanging out, I hope my ass don't stink ♪
- A plumber
(audience cheering)
(buzzer dings)
(audience cheering)
♪ You talking flow jobs, well I ain't got no job ♪
♪ Joc, that's a nice chain ♪
♪ You the first (beep) I'm gonna rob ♪
♪ Nah, I'm playing, but (beep) I might ♪
♪ If I really was good at this, I'd steal some height ♪
(audience laughing)
♪ Steal some height, I'm short, I need it ♪
♪ I'ma steal it, I'ma take it ♪
- Oh, a robber?
(buzzer dings)
- Exactly.
(audience cheering)
(audience clapping)
- Um, waiter, can I please get that booster seat for my son?
I just adopted him.
(buzzer dings)
(audience laughing)
- Aw, ladies, make some noise for Negro the Grouch!
- Shut up!
(buzzer dings)
- [Nick Cannon] Leave him there!
- Ah, I need help, oh (beep).
I am okay.
(audience laughing)
- I'm saying, like, you gonna give me the box or what?
(buzzer dings)
(audience laughs)
(audience cheers)
- [Charlie Clips] Move around, for real.
- [Emmanuel Hudson] What- You- What-
(object thumps)
(audience laughing)
(wrong buzzer sounds)
(audience laughs)
- Lil chocolate piñata, okay.
(audience laughing)
- (beep), shawty said she want smoke,
I rolled her a blunt taller than me, hell you talking about?
(buzzer dings)
(audience cheering)
♪ It's my birthday ♪
(audience cheering)
♪ It's my birthday ♪
♪ My name is Bobby, yeah ♪
♪ I keep it G, yeah ♪
♪ I need a blunt, yeah ♪
♪ As big as me, 'cause it's my birthday ♪
(buzzer dings)
♪ It's my birthday ♪
♪ Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, it's my birthday ♪
♪ My name Conceited, yeah ♪
♪ I know I'm small, yeah ♪
♪ But he so short, yeah ♪
♪ It make me look tall, 'cause it's my birthday ♪
(buzzer dings)
- The topic is "Tag Team Matches".
♪ Hey, now you wild out ♪
♪ Throw me off of the rope, throw me off of the rope ♪
♪ Throw me off of the rope, now you wild out ♪
♪ We dropping bows on 'em, we dropping bows on 'em ♪
♪ We dropping bows on 'em, now you wild out ♪
♪ I'm slamming 'em down, I'm slamming 'em down ♪
♪ I'm slamming 'em down, now you wild out ♪
♪ Got your mama in the middle, your mama in the middle ♪
♪ Your mama in the middle, now you wild out ♪
(audience cheering)
(buzzer dings)
- You (indistinct) my mama?
- Your topic is "Black Power".
♪ Pick up and kill it, and kill it, and kill it ♪
♪ Talking black power, what does that mean ♪
♪ If that's what we doing, shout out black queens ♪
♪ I love them black queens, they do they thing ♪
♪ But we can't forget about the black kings ♪
♪ Talking black kings, is that what we after ♪
♪ This is important, black lives matter ♪
♪ Black lives matter, yeah that's what's up ♪
♪ One more thing, (beep) Donald Trump ♪
♪ Pick up and kill it, and kill it, and kill it ♪
Your topic is "Disney Shows".
♪ Pick up and kill it, and kill it, and kill it ♪
♪ Talk about Disney, I know that you mad at me ♪
♪ Got your girl sticky, like "The Proud Family" ♪
♪ Like "The Proud Family", I really ball ♪
♪ My money is tall like Wizard Kelly, y'all ♪
♪ Wizard Kelly, y'all, that's amazing ♪
♪ You haven't grown since "That's So Raven" ♪
♪ "That's So Raven", all right, I ain't knocking you ♪
♪ But don't he look just like Ron Stoppable ♪
(audience laughing)
(buzzer dings) ♪ Kill it and kill it ♪
♪ Pick up and kill it ♪
- The topic is "Being Naughty".
♪ Pick up and kill it, and kill it, and kill it ♪
- Uh oh! ♪ Pick up and kill it, and kill it, and kill it ♪
♪ Yo, well my name is Big Rock and I'm in my 40's ♪
♪ I see the crowd and it's a lot of naughty shorties ♪
♪ Naughty shorties, well I do that, too ♪
♪ I got some (beep) in the middle of the school ♪
♪ Well, you in the school, but I'm so old school ♪
♪ And I do this like I do ♪
♪ You do it like you do, well I do, too ♪
♪ You may be old school, but the new school true ♪
♪ Well let me tell you something, you little (mumbles) ♪
(Big Rock chuckling)
I'm out.
(buzzer dings)
♪ Pick up and kill it, and kill it, and kill it ♪
(audience cheering)
- All right, Nick, my boy.
We go back, man.
- Facts.
- You know, I've been knowing you for a while.
You known to get some bad bitches close to you, baby.
I know about you, okay?
I just got a question about
two of your closest bad bitches, right?
We gonna have a bad bitch contest
and see who's in first place.
Now, will it be exhibit A?
Con?
(audience laughing)
That's some very bad bitches.
(audience laughing)
- Or will it be exhibit B, give it to me.
(audience laughing)
Now, D-Wreck was doing duck lips back in the 90's, baby.
(everyone laughing)
We want to know who's in first place.
- I plead the fifth.
(audience laughing)
(buzzer dings)
- [Bobby J] Jason Lee, which one is a badder bitch to you?
I just want to know your opinion.
- I ain't gonna plead the 5th, I'ma take Con.
(audience raving)
(buzzer dinging)
(audience cheering)
- Did you see Cortez body?
(audience laughing)
Wait no, Cortez, come here.
Now Nick, I know you done seen a stray dog.
(audience laughing)
I know you done seen stray cats.
(audience laughing)
This (beep) is the world's first stray stretch mark.
(audience laughing)
- I look like a sexy squid,
y'all better stop playing with me.
(buzzer dings)
- The original song goes something like this, y'all.
♪ The itsy bitsy spider climbed up the water spout ♪
- Aye, D-Wreck, man, drop that beat for us.
- Remix!
(horn playing)
♪ Turn me up, there we go, come on, come on ♪
♪ Let's go, come on, aye ♪
♪ Okay, the itsy bitsy spider ♪
♪ Came straight up out the south ♪
♪ Tell that boy to smile, he got golds in his mouth, aye ♪
♪ Diamonds in the rain and he got a big ass chain ♪
♪ The itsy bitsy spider just pulled up in a Range ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah, I'ma pull up in a spider ♪
♪ I be smoking on fire, aye, aye ♪
♪ Dropping bombs, Al-Qaeda ♪
♪ Might spend a check if I like her ♪
♪ My boy, Spider, fresh out the track ♪
♪ He in the Range and he got the pack ♪
♪ He hit me up like mack a sack ♪
♪ And I hit him back like copy that ♪
- ATL, turn up.
- [Audience] Turn up for what?
- 'Cause Tahiri said she gonna put me in her pocket
and take me home with her.
(audience laughing)
(hip hop music)
- [Nick Cannon] What?
- Aye, that would be a wonderful thing.
I don't know what you're talking about, I mean.
(buzzer dings)
- [Emmanuel Hudson] ATL, turn up.
- [Audience] Turn up for what?
- 'Cause my boy Bobby, here, finally tall enough
to babysit himself!
(audience laughing)
(hip hop music)
- [Audience] Aye, aye, aye.
(buzzer dings)
- ATL, turn up.
- [Audience] Turn up for what?
- 'Cause I went to the doctor
and (beep) said I'm still growing.
(audience raving)
(hip hop music)
♪ Get tall, get tall, get tall ♪
(buzzer dings)
♪ Hey, y'all, how y'all doing ♪
♪ This right here our cousin Clyde ♪
♪ His hairline so far back ♪
♪ That we can see what's on his mind ♪
♪ At the family reunion, who we introducing ♪
♪ This my cousin John, I swear he got the baddest chick ♪
♪ But he only got her 'cause he lied ♪
♪ And said he was Kaepernick ♪
♪ At the family reunion, who we introducing ♪
♪ This my cousin Whitney, and she's single as can be ♪
♪ Her last (beep) left 'cause she got a chest just like DC ♪
♪ At the family reunion, who we introducing ♪
♪ Who we introducing ♪
♪ This my cousin Brandon, and he is really funny ♪
♪ I don't care if we on Wild'N Out, Bobby give me my money ♪
- And I'm not playing, like I'll fight you for real,
I don't care nothing about this show,
I don't care about no work. Give me my money.
- Do something.
♪ At the family reunion ♪
♪ Who we introducing ♪
- [DJ D-Wreck] Security.
♪ This ain't my cousin, but he related to somebody we know ♪
♪ With this big ass head, this beard, and these glasses ♪
♪ He gotta be some kin to Chico ♪
♪ At the family reunion, who we introducing ♪
♪ Who we introducing ♪
♪ This ain't my cousin, but I know who you are ♪
♪ Aye Nick, why you ain't tell nobody ♪
♪ You invited Bruno Mars ♪
♪ At the family reunion, who we introducing ♪
♪ Naija told me don't say this ♪
♪ And if I do, I'm going to hell ♪
♪ But (beep) it, I know that I'm short ♪
♪ But have y'all seen her ponytail ♪
- Oh, my God.
♪ At the family reunion ♪
♪ Who we introducing ♪
- I need the Old School to step up.
- [Nick Cannon] Old School, step up.
- New School, step up here, I need you here.
(audience cheering)
Give me Bobby J, I need you here, Bobby J.
(audience cheering)
Give me Justina.
- Okay, let's go, what's up?
(audience cheering)
- Justina, you ready?
- You damn right.
- Bobby J, you ready?
- I'm ready.
- Runner roo!
- I see they set the ball real low.
Bobby, it looks like your mom got pregnant off pre-(beep).
(audience laughing)
- Aye, ain't she built like
one of the strippers in Grand Theft Auto?
(audience laughing)
Aye, hold on, let me see you move like this.
(audience laughing)
Let me see you move like this, let me see you do it.
(audience laughing)
- Bobby!
- You.
Out!
- [Audience] Got damned!
(buzzer dings)
(audience cheering)
- Okay, let's see what we got.
Give me Carlos Miller on the Old School.
(audience cheering)
New School, give me Bobby J.
You, here, Bobby, I need you here.
Carlos, you ready?
- I'm ready.
- Bobby J, you ready?
- I'm ready.
- Runner roo!
(audience laughing)
- Ladies, this is what happens when you only
take half of the Plan B pill.
(audience laughing)
- Aye, don't Carlos look like that old man
that be trying to (beep) your girl? Aye, nephew, that's you?
That's you, huh, that's you nephew?
(audience laughing)
I like that, nephew.
- Boy, if you don't get your baby body, grown man feet,
look like you ain't going nowhere fast,
ninja turtle face ass little boy.
(audience laughing)
- Work shaky, work shaky.
- Aye, aye, Carlos looks like he should be
on the front of a Black n Mild box like this.
(audience laughing)
(Bobby J and Carlos laughing)
- You.
Out!
- [Audience] Got damned!
(buzzer dings)