♪ (upbeat techno intro) ♪
- (React) So, I have a riddle for you. - Oh, okay. Oh, no. Okay.
- Ooh. Okay, Gollum, give it to me.
- (React) So, today, I'm gonna show you something happy,
but it might make you cry. - Oh, goddammit!
- (React) It's scary, but it's also a cause
for celebration. And it's something that all of us
in the LGBT+ community do at one point in our lives.
Do you know what it is? - Uh...
is it coming out? - If it's all of us,
it's going to be coming out. - Is this a coming out video?
- (React) Yes. - Awesome.
- (React) So, have you ever seen anyone come out on TikTok?
- Yes! I've seen a few. - And I look at it as a parent
now watching it, and so I just see how scared they are,
and that makes me sad. But they're incredibly moving
and incredibly touching. And I just wanna hug them.
- (React) Did it inspire you to wanna come out
when you're watching these types of videos?
- Yeah, definitely, 'cause I actually came out twice,
being like, "How do I tell my parents?"
Not that I thought my parents were gonna disown me or anything,
but, you know, it's scary. So, I came out to them
the first time, and they were like, "Cool."
And then, I came out a second time.
They were like, "Yeah, duh. We knew." (laughs)
- (React) Anyway, so there are tons and tons and tons
of people coming out on TikTok. - I'm interested to see
the ones on TikTok. I feel like they're gonna
be a little more creative perhaps. And I think you're right.
I think I will cry, so let's see.
- (React) Let's watch kinda the first one
that kinda started the whole trend.
- Okay! - (React) And I know this
is really hard to see, but it says, "Surprise, I'm bi."
- I thought so. I thought-- I was
kinda reading that a little. - (brother) Want me to come?
- Stop. - (Tatiana) Sure.
Well...
- (mom) "Surprise, I'm..." - (dad) Bi.
- (laughs) - (mom) You are?
- (dad) Racial?
- (mom) You are? - (dad) Racial?
- Biracial! (laughs) - (Tatiana) No, bisexual.
- (mom) Awww! - (dad) Is this a joke?
- (Tatiana) No. - (brother) Does it look
like she's joking? - (mom) Well, good for you!
- (Tatiana laughs) - Ahhh, yeah!
- (mom speaks foreign language) This is good news.
- (dad) Awww. We love you no matter what.
- Dad was a little slow to catch up, but he got there.
He got there. - (mom) Aww.
- (laughs) That's really sweet. The mom is super sweet.
- They're so supportive! - (React) And that's her brother.
- I was gonna say, that's her brother filming!
- (React) So, that was Tatiana's coming out. What are your thoughts?
- Oh, it seemed like it went really well.
- (React) How do you feel about her using a cake to come out?
- I think that's really cute, especially if you're nervous.
- If you put it externally on a cake, then they could
regard the cake, and it takes the pressure
off of you a little bit, and they just look at the message.
And the worst case scenario is that they get cake.
- I was already living with my wife at the time,
and I had gone shopping with my mom,
and went to lunch at Taco Bell. They thought we were roommates, right?
And "What are you gonna do if Laura meets someone
and you have to move out?" I'm like, "Oh, it'll be fine.
I'll figure it out," blah, blah, blah.
And she kept going and going and going.
I said, "Mom, we're together. I'm gay."
- (React) So, Tatiana's video and videos like Tatiana's
inspired a lot of other LGBT+ people on TikTok to come out.
Let's take a look at another one. - Yay!
- (React) I'm just gonna explain kind of what you're seeing
when you first see it. - Okay.
- (React) On the right, that is Jamie.
Jamie is non-binary. That's Jamie.
And Jamie's pronouns are he/they.
- Okay. - (React) But it's a duet.
So, on the left side of the video is Jamie
on right with Jamie's sister on the left reacting to the video.
- Okay. - (Jamie) I wish I were a boy.
♪ (soft ukulele music) ♪
Not all the time, just sometimes. I wish I could put on eyeliner
and glitter and actually look good and have girls whisper
about my bookshelves, 'cause I look like a character
from their favorite book. And I wish I were a boy
with dark, fluffy hair that I love to mess up
and shake and makes everyone stop and stare.
And I wish I were a boy, so I'd finally look cute
in dresses and skirts and pants and suits.
And I wish I were a boy with a deep rock and roll voice
that makes people stop in their tracks,
but I don't have that choice. And I wish that I did,
'cause every song I write for myself never sounds right,
because it was meant to be sung by somebody else.
I'm happy being me, but sometimes I wonder
what I would be like as the opposite gender.
Would I finally be happy being me, because I like being a girl?
But...
- That was the most perfect,
accurate, descriptive, educational song
about a non-binary person I think I have ever seen.
I am shooketh. I feel like I am seen.
- There was production value in that! - You can tell that they're definitely
an artist, and he put so much thought into it.
And it was very much their emotion as well.
- Ukulele in the background and kind of vocalizing
all these things that you've been thinking.
That's a super creative way of coming out.
- Although I am out and proud and everything and I am,
you know, not afraid to show who I am,
sometimes it's nice to see other people
like me and the trickle down effect of all the categories
under the rainbow. And I love that.
That's exactly how I feel, you know? Some days, I do want to be
quote, unquote, "girl," more so aesthetically and mentally
than anything else. But also, there's days
where I'm completely fine with being a guy.
I feel like if somebody ever came up to me
and asked me "What is non-binary?" or "What do you mean?"
I'd show them that video. - (React) So, not every coming out
is planned in advance, though. - Yeah. (chuckles)
- (React) Sometimes it happens by accident.
Let's take a look at Sir Carter's coming out story.
- Okay. - (Sir Carter) My coming out story
was not as cute as some of y'all's, let me tell you.
I see y'all making little rainbow cakes
with "I'm gay" on it, little five-paragraph poems
just explaining-- that shit's cute!
But you wanna know how I came out? You wanna know?
I was at a restaurant with my parents, and there was this FINE--
when I tell you this, FIIIINE-ass boy at the table across.
And I was just eating my food, like, looking back...
- Like, just stare. The... - (Sir Carter) ...flirting
with the eyes a little bit, giving the little Debby Ryan look!
And I was just looking-- and the last time,
I just... Just a little glance.
He got his ass up, walked over to the table.
I was like, "Oh, [censored]. What the [censored].
What is he doing, bitch?" And he comes over.
He's like, "Hey, I thought you were cute,
and I just kinda wanted to get-- I wanted to get your Snap!"
And I was like, "Ooh." And I looked at my parents.
I was like, I have a decision. I can either risk it all
for the [censored] and come out or have to turn
this fine-ass man away. Guess what I did?
I got the Snap and I came out, period!
- Good. - (Sir Carter) And do you wanna know
what my parents said? They said, "Good for you.
He was cute." - Awww.
- (Sir Carter) [Censored] king and queen right there, [censored]!
- Nice. Nice. That's my coming out kind of story.
I like that story! - Yeah, that's a--
(smooches) It's mwah. Chef's kiss.
Chef's kiss reaction of like, "He was cute.
Good for you." - (React) What would you have done
if you were in his shoes? - I'd give him the Snap. (laughs)
What it boils down, my parents love their kids.
I'll take a couple months of them being pissed
and da, da, da, for that, you know what I mean?
- Yeah, sometimes it takes a little time, I think,
sometimes for parents to wrap their heads around it.
- My relatives, again, very Catholic, very conservative.
You know, those things are not really disgust.
But we have figured out a way to come out elegantly,
where it's not an issue. And that is, if you talk
about your partner, you just mention their pronouns.
And that is usually enough for people to go, "OH!"
And then, if they're ready to discuss, then they'll say,
"So, how long did you know?" And then, that's when you know
you can talk to them about it. - I remember when I first came out
to one of my girlfriends. I was working this job
at a fashion show, and one of the male models,
this really tall, super hot Brazilian guy,
kept staring at me. I was like, "There's no way
he's looking at me. Whatever. In my dreams."
Plot [censored] twist: Within the next hour,
he's following me around like a puppy dog.
Next thing you know, I have his number.
It was because of that sort of spark and just natural desire
that I had to tell my girlie about it. I went over to her house,
and I was like, "I am so into this guy."
And she was like, "Okay, so you're into him."
And it was never like, "So, are you gay? You're gay?"
It was just, "All right."
- (React) Coming out doesn't always need to be
a big production or an accident. - Yes.
- (React) It can also just be super, super simple like the video
I'm about to show you. - Oh, I'm gonna cry.
I'm already choked! - (teen) Hey, Mom,
there's something I wanna tell you. - (mom) Yeah?
- (teen) Mom. - (mom) What?
- (teen) I'm trans. - (mom) Okay. Are you?
- (teen) Yeah. - (mom) Okay.
So, what does that mean for us? - That was a great question.
"Okay, what does that mean for us?" - (teen) I'm a boy.
- (mom) Okay. All right.
So, new name? - (teen) Oliver.
- (mom) Oliver. Okay. - That's awesome.
- (mom) ...with Dad when we get home and...
and figure out how to make that happen for you.
- (Oliver) Thank you. (laughs) - (mom) You're welcome.
- (Oliver) Oh my god! (laughs) I was so nervous
this entire car ride. - Aww, don't be nervous.
Honestly, I always wonder what the parents think
watching their kid cry or afraid to tell them.
- That was like [censored] textbook.
- I love that. I love how casual that was,
the mom just being like, "Okay, cool. What's your name?
Okay, we'll get the process going." - She asked for the name,
which was amazing. - And also, the music behind the video
was perfect. I felt like it was a gospel, like,
♪ Hallelujah ♪ - But I'll tell you what, man,
that woman NAILED that reaction! Nailed it! Mad props.
- (React) There's probably, you know, a lot of people
who are contemplating coming out. Maybe they're not quite ready
to come out, and that's okay too.
- Yeah. - (React) And I wanted your reaction
to this video. - Okay.
(knocking) - Hello?
- Oh, hey, hey, hey. I brought you some snacks.
You got a hanger on your head. Here, I brought you
some snacks, though. Here you go.
Just wanted you to know that take your time.
And when you're ready, you got a whole group
of people that support you. All right. See you later.
- Oh, that's so great! - That's really sweet. I love that.
- Yes! That's so good! Why did that one make me cry?
Although, it was kinda funny too. - I might copy that.
I'm gonna copy that sage. - (React) So, what advice
would you have for someone watching this, young or old,
who's maybe considering coming out? - As much as you wanna come out,
it's gonna depend on your circumstance,
who you're coming out to. You can sort of gauge
based off of previous discussions who might be a good ally.
- For anybody who's just confused in their self and their identity,
that's okay. You don't have to know.
If none of the labels feel right, that's okay. You don't have
to pick one of them. - Even before I came out
as trans, like, "I'm too old. I can't do this,"
'cause, you know, you look on YouTube and all these
trans YouTubers are like, "Oh, I started transitioning
when I was in high school." And I was like,
"I would've loved that!" But I've heard stories
of people in their 70s and 80s finally being like,
"Hey, I'm trans, and I'm transitioning."
And I'm like, (claps) "Yes!"
It's never too late to be authentic and live your truth.
- Whether you find love or not is always going to be up
in the stars, right? But ultimately, you look
for who respects you. And that is who your community
and family is. - Sometimes, your family,
as a queer person, isn't your immediate family.
It is your closest friend. It is the queer person
who works at the 7-Eleven that you frequent often
who has amazing nails and the coolest eyeliner
you've ever seen. And before you know it,
this video will be old, I will be ancient,
and you'll be like, "LOL remember when George was trying
to convince me to come out and now Kiking together
at all the gay clubs?" - But if there are people
in your life that you know you'd be unsafe,
that you know would cause you harm emotionally or physically or be that,
you don't owe them the explanation of coming out to them.
- Come out to yourself. Learn to appreciate you,
who YOU are. And once you can build that up,
then maybe you'll be able to get to the point where you feel so good
about who you are as a person that the other noise doesn't matter.
- I thought, "Oh, I'm bi. You know, that's a good label for me."
And then, I went to my first Pride, and one of the most fiercest women
I have ever met in my life, she explained to me what queer was.
It's an umbrella term that encapsulates the fluidity
of gender and sexuality. So, when she explained what that was,
I was like, "Oh my god. That's me." And that Pride weekend,
I came out to my close group of friends.
- Don't feel pressure if you're not ready.
And if you are ready, then know that there's a huge community here
that will love you endlessly. - Don't let any person
on this planet try to dim your shine or tell you that you aren't valid
or you don't get to exist, because, baby, you are here
and you are [censored] queer!
- (React) And on that note, I have kind of a scripted
little moment, where we can tell our viewers
about the Trevor Project. - Great.
If you're feeling sad or alone-- I'm gonna cry!
Wait. I'll do it. I'll do it. (clears throat)
If you're feeling sad or alone, there are people who would
love to talk to you. - Give someone
at the Trevor Project a call. - Or if you have a little bit
of anxiety with phone calls, visit their website.
- Or you can even text them. - They're available 24/7.
- The Trevor Project has some awesome coming out resources online.
I encourage you to check them out. - Remember, you are loved.
And coming out or not, you do you.