(bouncy music)
♪ Ian's house is haunted by horny ghosts ♪
♪ They're rubbing on his fridge ♪
♪ And they're (beep)ing his toast ♪
♪ Ian has to run from the ghost in his house ♪
♪ So who in the world will Ian live with now ♪
- Hey guys, Ian here.
So my house is infested with horny ghosts,
and I can't ask them to leave
because they're kinda into that
which is, you know, our, I won't say it's weird.
I'm not going to kink shame,
but I do have to find another place to live
until they decide to leave on their own accord.
Thankfully, Ethan, otherwise known as CrankGameplays
has agreed to let me stay with him.
Let's fricking go!
Let's go gamers!
♪ So who in the world will Ian live with now ♪
- All right. Got Ian, coming over.
He's a little weird.
He might do some weird (beep), but it's fine.
He's a good friend.
And I gotta be a good friend back.
So just be accommodating.
(banging on door)
- [Ian] Ethan!
Ethan, it's Ian!
- Geez, okay.
Hey.
- Hey, Ethan!
- How's it going? How are you?
- Here's my stuff.
Thank you so much for letting me stay.
- This is really light.
- Yeah, there's nothing in there.
Just before I stay here,
you don't have any like talking furniture
or anything that might kill me?
Any crazy cats or anything like that?
- No.
What?
- Don't even worry about it.
Hey, do you mind if I just go to sleep right now?
I'm very exhausted.
- If you go to sleep right now?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Sure.
- Yeah. Can I sleep there?
- Come on over.
- [Ian] Awesome.
- I only have this blanket.
It's kinda small.
I think it shrunk in the wash.
- Oh no, no, no.
That's perfect. I only get the freezies on my legs, so-
- Oh, okay.
- So you just put it there on my legs.
- [Ethan] Put it-?
- [Ian] Yup, here on my legs.
- There you go.
Night-night Ian.
- Wait, Ethan.
Can you tuck me in?
My mom's not here so I need somebody to do the tuckies.
- I'm not going to do the tuckies.
- Tuck me in Ethan.
- Okay. You've got it.
I'm an accommodating host.
- (yawning) That's perfect.
- Have a good nap.
- Yes, that's great. Thank you.
We'll hang out later or whatever, do a collab or something,
but I got to sleep now.
- What is happening?
Who are you?
(Ian snoring)
(knocking at door)
Hello?
- Hi. Are you Ethan from CrankGameplays?
- Yeah, the one and only.
- I am Agent Carp from the IRS.
You're being audited.
- Jesus Christ, what? Why?
- You applied for a child tax credit
when we have no proof of you ever bearing a child.
So I need to run an investigation and if you're lying,
you're going to jail.
- (beep), what's the streaming situation like in jail?
- The wifi is (beep).
- (beep), okay listen, my kid isn't here right now.
He is at kid school.
So you might just have to come back later.
- But Damien you said you'd help me count to 10.
- But isn't that your kid?
- Him?
Yes. Yes!
That is my, that is my son, Ian.
Come on in.
Come and meet my son, Ian!
- Hi little guy.
It's okay, I like nap time too.
- Yeah. Naps are the best in you just ruined it!
- Hey buddy, Ian son.
It's all right.
- No, the bad lady ruined my nap.
- I'm so sorry.
Can I get you a snack?
Maybe some PB and J?
- I could do some sushi.
- That's our code for appy slices and milk.
- Oh, okay.
(gentle music)
- Appy?
- No thanks bud.
You eat all those yourself.
- I got to say this scarf is pretty cool.
- Wow, his language skills are very advanced.
- Thanks, I make funny videos.
- Oh, that's so fun.
- It is fun.
- Ian, drink your milk.
- Oh, I can't, I'm lactose intolerant.
- Ian, drink your milk
or you can't go play in the sprinklers later.
- Gosh, (beep) I love playing in the sprinklers.
Okay.
- Good job, bud.
Nice.
Here's your Cocoa Melon.
- Okay. I don't know how you knew this,
but I fricking love Cocoa Melon.
I hope this is the last hamster song, I love that one.
♪ Come on, let's have some fun ♪
♪ Co-Co-Come on, let's have some fun ♪
(notification dings)
Aw, shit!
Ethereum's down!
I'm gonna lose everything!
I shoulda holdeld Doge.
- Wait a minute-
He could be a very tall baby
who's very aware of cryptocurrency
or you're scamming the IRS!
- Me. No!
- Bro, you trying to scam the IRS?
That's poggers.
- This isn't even your baby, is it?
- Hold up. Ethan.
You told her I was a baby?
That's so freaking embarrassing, man.
- Shh!
He wants to be called a big boy.
- No, no, no!
This is not okay. I am not a baby!
I am a grown adult!
No, this makes me so mad!
It jut makes me (groaning).
(Ian farts)
Oh...
Oh God.
- Ian.
- What?
- Did you just (beep) yourself?
- No.
I didn't (beep) myself.
- Ian, we can all smell it.
You just (beep) your pants.
- Well, it looks like I stand corrected.
No adult man, would ever rage-poop their pants.
Ethan, you're in the clear.
(gentle music)
- Thank you so much.
And thank you so much for coming by!
- You have raised a very smart and healthy child.
Ian, please save our poo-poos for the potty.
- [Ethan] Yeah we do, we do.
- [Agent Carp] Take care.
- Thank you so much.
Come by any time.
We're always down for a play date.
All right, except for on school nights.
All right, safe drive home.
Dude, thank you so much for forcing out a poop like that
just to pretend you're my kid.
I was this close to going to jail for tax evasion.
- Yes.
Yeah. I did it on purpose to save you from jail.
- Yup, that's what I just said.
- I pooped myself on purpose to save you.
- Yeah.
Thank you, I appreciate it.
- I am your hero.
- Yeah.
You could say that, I guess.
(Ian farts)
- Oh, I thought I heard her coming back.
- Okay.
- So...
So, what now?
(uplifting music)
(high pitched beep)
- I'm not going to tuck you in, Ian.
- Ethan, my mom's not here.
(Ethan laughing)
- I'm so sorry.
- It's okay.
- Just, "Ethan."
(high pitched beep)
(banging on door)
- [Ian] Ethan!
Ethan, I'm here!
It's Ian!
Hey buddy.
- I started laughing.
(all laughing) (high pitched beep)
(gentle music)
(Ethan laughs)
- That's so (beep) stupid, Ian.
- [Crew Member] You know you caused a scene, right?
- Yeah.
- [Crew Member] Okay, good, as long as you know.
- Oh I know.
- [Crew Member] As long as you know.
- The feet. - I can't, dude.